What do you call an amusement park ride that's completely made out of iron?

A Ferrous Wheel! :D

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fafnir_19
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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A family is in an amusement park and comes across an animatronic display of Al Gore playing the drums.

The mother says, "Hey everyone, look at that. Isn't that amazing?" The father, unimpressed, replies, "It's just an algorithm".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mgrasso75
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
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Me (feeling discomfort while at a North Atlantic bird-themed amusement park):

"Well, this is Auk-World...."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pj566
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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How do you know an amusement park isn't fake?

When you see the ferris wheel.

(Made this joke after a 10 minute argument with my 5 year old niece. She pointed out the ferris wheel and I kept saying "I know... the fair is real.")

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFifthStep
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2020
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At amusement parks, when the line splits, we never pick the right line.

We always go left.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/masterzeus2
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
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Did you ever hear of the girl who got dumper at the amusement park?

It was an emotional roller coaster

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigggdaddie
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2018
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My friends were arguing about which roller coaster to go on next at the amusement park. When they asked for my opinion, I told them I didn't care.

I was just along for the rides.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBuccaneer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2017
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Dad jokes at the old amusement park.

First day of summer vacation, pack up the family and bring them to Canobie Lake Park, a local amusement park.

We all get on the Ferris Wheel and the listen to the instructions:

Operator: "Please keep you arms and legs in the cart at all times, remain seated until the ride comes to a complete stop and please NO ROCKING!"

Me: "Awwww man, I was just abut to crank some AC/DC"

My family and the family in line behind us: ::audible groans::

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MikeTheBum
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2016
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The Foo Fighters should have their own amusement park ride called the "Rockin' Grohlercoaster"

I just picture Dave Grohl riding the coaster car in his throne with his leg in a cast rocking out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tubachris85x
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2016
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Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the amusement park?

He sued them for funfair dismissal.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wizzix
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2017
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Taking a car load of kids to amusement park today. One kid screams "Please tell me that's Knott's Berry Farm." ...

I reply, "It's Knott."

Kids in unison "Awww."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Papa-Dam
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2016
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Saw a guy riding an amusement park ride alone today.

I wonder if he still said "weeee!", or if he said "meeee!" instead.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/igdfr
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2016
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At an amusement park when I was younger

Me: Come on Dad, pick up the pace!

dad: Why? Did you drop it?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tetraporc
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2013
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When I found out crayola had a amusment park I was colerfuly suprised.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFlom
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
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I need help from all the dads out there...

You are tasked with making an advertisement for an amusement park, however you want to make it to STOP people from coming to the carnival... I'm curious to see your advertisements, also try to keep the jokes under 50 words.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brilliance79
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
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Pretty proud of my son ; wife isn't so much

This last weekend we went to an amusement park. Everything we went through the little things that spray water on you, my 9 year old would say, "Mist me." Every single time. My wife and daughter's reaction became more and more aggravated, but I felt pretty good about it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sineofthetimes
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2016
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My Dad finds away to make everything funny.

I was in line for a ride at an amusement park with my family and boyfriend, when my dad saw a sign just like this one http://imgur.com/3dGi1hU.

He takes one look at it, and without speaking directly to anyone in my family he says "Miracles this way? Must be one hell of a ride."

Then he just looked at me with the biggest smirk on his face, like he had just said the funniest thing anyone could ever say. I love that man.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/reddicted9313
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2014
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Punny names of Dark Souls 3 bosses.

For reference: Link to wiki

Some of these are done in a kind of "news headline"-style:

  • Choir leader fired after using too much sexual innuendo; "Lewd Ex Cantor."

  • Video on demand about a street where nothing happens; "Vod of the Boring Alley."

  • Man's brutal cousin turns out to be a great bloke; "Raw-Ted, Great Dude".

  • Panic spreads as toilet facilities take over the world; "Cry! Stall-Age."

  • A man orders a book of basic letters to look after his daughters belongings while he looks after the others; "ABC, Watch Her's!".

  • Sams brother cheats a dude; "Dean Cons the Peep."

  • A ride in the amusement park offers a wide range of emotions; "High! Low! Woo! Nah."

  • A weird and hard to describe new dessert; "Cold Lemon Thing."

  • A new star in stand up rises! Come see "Puntiff Sulyvahn."

  • Pirates start eating fava beans and a new drink is required; "Yo! Ho! The Chianti!."

  • A Long lived man has an unusual apetite for fish; "Old-Rick, Devourer of Cods".

  • In Bacteria-Town, a devastating disease strikes one inhabitant working at a hotel; "Cancer of the Borrelia Valet".

  • Roman god Cubid is ordered to take a woman to cave and kill her; "Drag and Slay Her Amor"

  • Osiris's statue has been in way too many marriages and people have started to call it; "Osiris the Consummated Thing."

  • The choir leader from before is transformed into a mushroom; "Champignon Cantor"

  • An english man becomes the leader of a Polish airplane company and gets nicknamed; "LOT-Rick"

  • An impatient tree person attacks a random mythical hunter; "Antsy Ent! Why Hern?!"

  • Horse named Elvis keeps making noise and a man shouts;"Neigh Less King!"

  • A child opens a chocolate egg and a white spirit jumps out; "Soul of Kinder"

Sorry about the possible typos.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dralnu22
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2016
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Almost got splashed by the water.

One hot day, my friend and I were at the amusement park. We were just about to walk through the splash zone for a water ride when we saw the come down the track and spray water everywhere. By the time we reached the splash zone, all that was left in the air was a light mist. "I wish we would've gotten hit with the water, but it mist."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mbrdfld3
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2016
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Holy Cow

So we're on vacation in Florida at Silver Springs (this is a kind of zoo amusement park place). I'm walking around with my dad and we see this massive turtle. I look at the turtle and say "Holy cow!" My dad turns to me and says loud enough for everyone around us to hear: "No Sam, that's a turtle."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/steven_scramkos
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2015
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dadjoked at the german market

a friend was in line for a ride at an amusement park and saw a german sausage stand.

"wouldn't mind a german hotdog after this i'm starving"

"we're not getting sausages from over there."

"why not?"

"they're the wΓΌrst."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gmanji212
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2014
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Dad joked on the way to Universal Studios Florida

Driving up to the amusement park and pass a sign reading "Universal Parking."
Dad says, "do you think this is the parking for everybody?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/K_Fred
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2014
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Managed to get my cousins today

We were at an amusement park and getting thirsty. I suggested we stop for a drink, they wanted to go on one more ride. Afterwards one of them said:

"I'm thirsty, lets get a drink" to which I replied "I said it first. Guess you can say I'm firsty".

Facepalming and groaning ensued. I laughed like a maniac.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirSvieldevitchen
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2014
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Is this amusement-park big wheel made of iron?

Yes. It's a ferrous wheel

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sawrce
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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What is Ironman’s favorite ride at the amusement park?

The Ferrous Wheel!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andeargdue
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
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