Do you know what is used to provide vision at night at school playgrounds?

Recessed lighting!

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18
🚨︎ report
What do you say when you see / had seen a pirate version of saw holding a frozen buzzsaw on a piece of playground equipment?

I see/saw sea saw on a seesaw, with an icy saw

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 30
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Prisoner tunnels out of jail and emerges in a school playground shouting β€œI’m free”!

Little girl walks up and shouts β€œI’m four!”

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigpapastu
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28
🚨︎ report
My eggs went to the playground without my permission today.

But omelette it slide

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Leon_Waffles
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25
🚨︎ report
Why did the child cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jaymb90
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17
🚨︎ report
Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 92
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Detective Johnson and detective Smith were investigating a murder that occurred next to a playground. The only witnesses to the murder were four children, a brother age 3 and sister age 4, and a different brother (age 7) and sister (age 8).

The children all lived in a nearby apartment complex. The younger siblings lived in apartment 8D and the older ones lived in apartment 9D. Detective Johnson advised Detective Smith that she probably shouldn’t bother question 8D’s children about what they saw, since they’re too young to have a reliable memory. He believed that Smith would have a better chance of getting good information from the older children, since only 9D’s kids will remember.

πŸ‘︎ 393
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SausageOnToast
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04
🚨︎ report
My toddler was about to hit his head on a bar at the playground, so I told him to duck.

He quacked at me then hit his head on the bar.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/meatbag_289
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the little kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/caffene_migraines
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the four-legged semiaquatic carnivorous mammal cross the playground?

To get to the otter slide.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Squibblezombie
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I was supposed to build a playground for my little brother, but I accidentally broke it.

My dad said he'll let this slide for now.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sphmer1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
They’re building a park down the street from me that’s supposed to be done soon but they don’t have any playground equipment, trees, nothing.

They have a lot on their hands.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ystad31
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the hedghog cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BrewingBear
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the human child cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Two kids were on the playground, about to get in a fight. One drew a line in the sand and told the other, β€œIf you cross this line, I’ll punch you in the face.”

That was the punch line.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingInTheNorth57
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call an adult man playing on a playground in his suit?

A lawyer on recess

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jrbjordan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2018
🚨︎ report
What kind of witches like playgrounds?

Sandwiches!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/amurr88
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the boy cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gaeleng
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2018
🚨︎ report
I got in a fight at the park with a guy who was hogging the playground equipment.

He took a swing.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoeticQuality
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Spiders are a playground for dads

My dad and I were on a hike when I knocked down part of a spiderweb.

My dad: Uh oh, you just knocked out their entertainment room!

Me: what kind of cable do they have?

My dad: they don't have cable, they just stream it from the web

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Amessersmith109
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2017
🚨︎ report
What game do accountants play on the playground when they were kids?

Deduct, deduct, degooset.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zermie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2017
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/anitabonghit69
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16
🚨︎ report
Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MclovinCanada
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bilboisreal
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/td941
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/royaj77
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/otfjokes
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bwburke94
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 89
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πŸ‘€︎ u/skonen_blades
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2017
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/newtieTHEcutie
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/torg1982
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlocher92
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ImAHawkwardPerson
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2017
🚨︎ report
Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bayangan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2015
🚨︎ report

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