Aggrade Puns

is currently listed on market, willing to negotiate price
https://steamcommunity.com/id/mat_pac

New hat, new effect, fresh unbox, still untradable until the 12th.Currently listed on market.

Also accepting dota 2 items and key offers.

[Screenshot]

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

The nurse asked the rabbit, “what is your blood type?”

“I am probably a type O” said the rabbit.

Mentos

(I will see myself out)

The doctor says it terminal.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Mathematical puns makes me number

We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

He lost May

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Said if she ever hosts a gender reveal party, when it comes time to pop the balloon she'll spray everyone with water.

Gender is fluid.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

But let me give it a shot.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

He’s the new temp.

Via HLDS:

• Fixed an exploit related to players impersonating other Steam accounts
• Updated custom player sprays to be disabled for players by default
• Players can opt-in to see custom player sprays on community servers in the Advanced Options menu
• Custom player sprays and other temp files will be deleted when disconnecting from a server
• Fixed an exploit related to creating unnamed Normal quality items
• Removed the disconnect reason when a player leaves the server
• Fixed the Fireproof Secret Diary not cloaking
• Fixed the Medic's weapon not hiding during the High Five taunt
• Fixed the equip_region for the Crocodile Dandy
• Fixed taunt_medic_heroic.wav not playing during case openings and trade-ups
• Fixed the Heavy being able to crouch and jump while stunned
• Fixed overhead player icons not drawing while connected to match servers
• Fixed Dragon's Fury projectiles not passing through tf_generic_bomb entities
• Updated the tf_generic_bomb entity to allow passing the activator in the OnDetonate output
• Toggle this feature using the Pass Activator option. Default is No.
• Updated several of the Summer 2021 cosmetic items to add item_type_name descriptions
• Updated the Coffin Nail warpaint for the shotgun to add the missing "has team color paintkit" attribute
• Updated material for the Hazard Headgear to fix problems with painting and using minmap
• Updated item schema with community fixes from Andrés S. (rabscootle)
• Updated Spy invis materials with community fixes from Liam Stone (boba)
• Updated description of the "Strange Part: Player Hits" item to match its name
• Updated materials for the Time Out Therapy taunt
• Updated the material for the RED dueling icon to match the BLU dueling icon
• Updated backpack images for the Mislaid Sweater and Mr. Quackers to fix size and centering issues
• Updated the description for the Backpack Expander
• Updated the Resonation, Aggradation, and Lucidation unusual effects to fix a problem when taunting
• Updated Golden Wrench, Saxxy, and Golden Frying Pan kills to use the Australium background for death notices
• Updated the link for the New User Forum button in the main menu
• Updated/Added some tournament medals
• Updated the localization files
• Updated cp_snakewater_final1
• Minor visual fixes
• Minor clipping fixes
• Slightly increased spawn time when attacking last
• Fixed some jumps being made impossible in previous update
• Made some areas like resp

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Amy

Put it on my bill

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi