"What part of your body would you get rid of?"

"My spine. It holds me back."

πŸ‘︎ 161
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
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Today I met a man who was holding a cage full of bees.

Confused, I asked him, "Hey man what's up with the bees?" And he suddenly said, "You're ugly."

Affronted, I said, "Ugly?!! And what do YOU know about looks!"

So he told me, "Beauty is in the eye of the beeholder."

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rogue2555
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
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At work, I was talking about the Weather Channel

Coworker: you're the weather channel

Me: you're right.... my name isn't 'Not_Mr_Manager', it's always been 'the weather channel'. It was all just... a front.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Not_Mr_Manager
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2016
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