Coming this fall to CBS, a new sitcom about a pair of actresses living in the 17th Century...
It’s called “2 Baroque Girls”.
I made a comment about an actresses short hair to my fiancée
Me: "Hmm, I wish I could pull off her short hair, I never could"
Him: "Aw, I'm sure you could. I'll hold her down while you yank it out"
Didn't see that coming.
Edit: thanks guys I didn't realise fiance/e has genders.
Naomi Watts is one of the most powerful actresses in Hollywood
Actresses are so cheesey these days..
Especially Gooey Bechamel
What are your best actresses/countries puns?
-
Cameroon Diaz
-
Jennifer Afghaniston
-
Japanne Hathaway
-
Panama Anderson
I told my wife my favorite actress is Allison Brie.
She disagreed, she thinks Allison is too cheesy.
I really like that actress in “House of Cards,” “Manhattan” and “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.”
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
Did you hear that one actress was stabbed? Reese something?
Wife: Witherspoon?
Me: No, with a knife.
A hot actress tried out for my play. She spoke the archaic version of "your" beautifully...
What do you call a devout Catholic American Actress?
Who is Goofy's favorite actress ?
Why do we say break a leg in the theatre?
Its because everyone in the play is in a cast
Did you know Hollywood awards shows aren't real?
It's just a bunch of paid actors and actresses in the audience.
What do you get when you cross a famous Hollywood actress with a meta punchline?
What do you call an actress that accidentally leaned on a barbecue?
How many shrimp does it take to make a famous actress?
I decided to sketch an actress, so I ...
Did you hear about the actress that stabbed her husband with a fork?
Joke teller: “it was Reese... ohh what was her name..Reese..”
Person: “Witherspoon?!”
Joke teller: “No I just told you it was with her fork!”
I read a famous actress is very excited to star as a pregnant woman in a motion picture
Personally I think she's just ovary acting.
The conceited actress was given a fancy trailer and liked to show off her dressing table
Her full vanity was on display
Who is the pastry chef's favorite actress?
I heard that actress Reese whatshername is in rehab because she is addicted to eating soup...
Witherspoon?
Dad: I assume so, but nobody knows for sure
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself. MOM: Oh my! Who!? DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something? MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way into town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way into town, apparently an actress just killed herself
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself. MOM: Oh my! Who!? DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something? MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
Dad: I was just listening to the radio, a famous actress killed herself!
Mom: oh no! Who?
Dad: Um, I can remember! I think her name was Reese or something.
Mom: WHITHERSPOON?
Dad: No, it was with a knife.
Actress just killed herself
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself. MOM: Oh my! Who!? DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something? MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!??????? DAD: No, it was with a knife
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself. MOM: Oh my! Who!? DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
An actress just killed herself...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself. MOM: Oh my! Who!? DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something? MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!??????? DAD: No, it was with a knife...
Dad: i was listening to the radio it says some actress killed her self
Me: OMG WHO
Dad: i dunno reese somthing
Me: WITHERSPOON
Dad: no with a knife
Sister: Did you hear about that actress who stabbed someone? Reese something or other?
Me: Witherspoon?
Sister: No! With a knife!
Did you hear about that actress who got stabbed last night? Reese something....
"witherspoon?"
"No, with a knife!"
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