Bill Gates meets Arnold Schwarzenneger at a party and asks him if he's upgraded to Windows 10 yet? Big Arnie replies.......

"Ah still love Vista Baby....."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 11k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ipoointhepool
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 22 2021
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Why havenโ€™t aliens visited our Solar System yet?

They looked at the reviews... only 1 star

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Belpix0
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 09 2021
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Kevin James Franco in his best role yet!
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/FFPOE
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 11 2021
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I was standing in line waiting to have my hair cut, when I noticed that no one had started a fire yet.

I thought, "This is a shit barber queue."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 42
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 16 2021
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We donโ€™t have any vegetable jokes on this Subreddit yet...

So if you do, lettuce know.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 32
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thedudenamedjay
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 12 2021
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Has anyone read the prequel to Hamlet yet ?

Piglet!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 22 2021
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A family is flying to Japan on vacation. The son ask "dad, are we there yet" the dad replies "not yet son"

A few hours later the plane lands in japan. The dad looks at his son and says "okinawa here"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 71
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Trees_and_bees_plees
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 23 2021
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Dad: *Watching cop show with daughter late at night* Dad: Time for bed kiddo! Daughter: Iโ€™m not tired yet though!

Dad: Pretending to be a dispatcher Yeah, sheโ€™s resisting arrest

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Echo_The_God
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 19 2021
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An unintended yet still intended pun
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 13
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ATMiceli
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 16 2021
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Yet another job lost to machines
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 81
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/BlazeMrk
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 24 2021
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My son's not even one yet, and he's Walken already.
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 46
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/awesome_smokey
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 05 2021
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My best pun yet
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 21
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Habeto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 23 2021
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The furniture store called me back yet again

all I wanted was that one night stand tho...

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 28
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/shaystibelman
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 25 2021
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Yet another from my 10 year old: What do you call a boomerang that doesnโ€™t come back?

A stick

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 18
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Angus-Mackenzie
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 13 2021
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Given that a case of the sniffles means staying home from school, we give my daughter a daily allergy medicine. My wife was giving her breakfast before school, and when I walked out, I asked if sheโ€™d had her medicine yet.

My daughter said yes, and I replied, โ€œSo youโ€™re de-Claritin that youโ€™ve had it already?โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 43
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/bpcombs
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 17 2021
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Have y'all been to the new sausage restaurant yet?

To be quite Frank, it's the wurst.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/majestic_walrus1
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 03 2021
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Twenty Twenty won, and we're not out of the water yet! 2022 is Twenty Twenty too!
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/CallMeCarrie
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 02 2021
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So Iโ€™m at dinner with the fam, telling the joke about what the kid with no arms got for Christmas (we still donโ€™t know because he hasnโ€™t opened them yet)...I set it up...a friend of mine at work has a kid...no arms...and deliver the punchline...

And my 10 year old son, completely deadpan, tells me

โ€˜Dad, I knew that story wasnโ€™t real because you donโ€™t have any friendsโ€™

๐Ÿ‘ป๐Ÿ‘ป๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€โ˜ ๏ธโ˜ ๏ธ It took me a solid 5 minutes to stop laughing.

I have achieved Dad level 10 at raising my kids

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 20
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/themeatspin
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 10 2021
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I just got my husband with my best one yet

I said, โ€œwhat have I told you about leaving the power tools out where the dogs can reach them?โ€

He looked really confused and said โ€œWhat? I didnโ€™t leave anything outโ€

โ€œbecause the dog is over here sawing some logs!โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/jaxinthebox14
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 08 2020
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I haven't seen many Thanksgiving puns yet

But I'm sure more may flower in time.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/E420CDI
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 25 2020
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I can't believe chickens haven't come up with a new sound yet

Maybe they should start thinking outside the bawks

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 41
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Da_Brootalz
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 16 2020
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Why havenโ€™t aliens visited us yet?

They saw the rating- only one star.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 81
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/SZT2
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 04 2020
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My coworker asked what itโ€™s called when you ask something but havenโ€™t gotten an answer yet.

I told him thatโ€™s an outstanding question.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/zachpledger
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 07 2021
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I don't think the coast is clear just yet
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 680
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ohsureyoudo
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 30 2020
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In a field with lots of sheep and lambs roaming around, a giant wolf appeared and swallowed whole a baby lamb. The lamb whined and yelped nonstop for hours on end. After a while the wolf started getting sick, and yet the lamb yelped and whined ever louder.

Finally the wolf died and the baby lamb walked out of the wolf and rejoined itโ€™s momma in the flock of sheep. Turns out the wolf died of internal bleating.

All credit goes to my coworker.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/robertmmoore143
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 09 2020
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I made this. Do you hate me yet?
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 32
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Lianrhod
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 05 2020
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Knot finished with this format yet
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Extrahub
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 11 2019
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Does anyone know if we can start taking showers yet?

Or are we still just washing our hands?

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 368
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/hirsty19784
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 16 2020
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This isnโ€™t mine and I donโ€™t know who made it, but itโ€™s been on my phone for so many years and I havenโ€™t seen it on here yet. I hope you all love it as much as I do.
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 75
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/DarkRune23
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 15 2020
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hopefully this wasnt posted here yet; found this on r/memes
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 36
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/RedLeader11037
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 26 2020
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Have I not yet told you my summary about the history of clocks?

Well, it's about time.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 80
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/JustHumanGarbage
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 18 2020
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I saw yet another fence joke but this one seemed a bit out of line

So I offered to repost it

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/codeninjaking42
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 07 2020
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Has this been posted here yet?
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Mythoclast-
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 01 2019
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I swear I ordered the sirloin, yet they brought me a t- bone

Apparently I have been mistaken.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ManicMuncy
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 17 2020
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Envelope: โ€œare we there yet? Iโ€™m worried weโ€™re not going to make it!โ€

Mailman: โ€œIโ€™ll keep you postedโ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/dandan_56
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 07 2020
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Are the Americans awake yet?
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 25
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/TelepathicPsych
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 23 2020
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Trump and Pence were preparing to leave the Whitehouse for a big rally. When the helicopter arrived, Trump wasn't ready yet, so Pence asked: "Do you want me to wait for you Mr. President?" ...

"No Mike, you fly on ahead and I'll catch up later".

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/KW-DadJoker
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 15 2020
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Iโ€™m drawing a picture of a zoo animal, but Iโ€™m not finished yet.

Itโ€™s just a rough giraffe.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/FinalCaveat
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 30 2020
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During the quarantine, my 4 year old has been learning Spanish. Yet, he still canโ€™t say please.

Which I think is poor for four.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 78
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/donkeyknuckles
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 14 2020
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Are we there yet?
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 56
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/SCBeauty
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 16 2020
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I thought this belong here to (hope nobody posted it here yet) /r/Jokes/comments/ifow41/โ€ฆ
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/plap12
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 25 2020
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Why haven't aliens visited our solar system yet?

They looked at the reviews, but we only had one star

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 19
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Termin201
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 19 2021
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Why haven't the aliens visited earth yet?

They read the reviews... only one star

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 101
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Tawzeeh
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 30 2020
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Why havenโ€™t aliens visited our solar system yet?

They looked at the reviews first...... only 1 star

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 56
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/callmekrusty
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 20 2020
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