Ima start spelling weed oui’d cos I can’t say no to it
πŸ‘οΈŽ 366
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/shpam-
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 21 2021
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I had a friend who smoked weed on Mount Everest.

He told me he was really high.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 112
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RedShirtCashion
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 31 2021
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What do you call a couch potato that smokes a lotta weed?

Fries

πŸ‘οΈŽ 30
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/boombotser
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 20 2021
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I smoke my weed on the toilet

I'm high on pot

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/spartan2024
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 15 2021
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I once watched a couple of cows smoke weed and play poker

I guess the steaks were pretty high

πŸ‘οΈŽ 62
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Durty_Rick_Sanchez
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 03 2021
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A farmer noticed some cows smoking weed and playing cards

The steaks were getting pretty high

πŸ‘οΈŽ 51
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/yoru
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 29 2021
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I'm fine with alcohol and weed, but cocaine is where I draw the line !
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/M_Arslan_Tahir
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 16 2021
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What do you call a Scotsman who smokes weed ?

Highlander!!! 😊

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RestlessBoredMonkey
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 29 2021
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How do you know if a cow takes weed?

The steaks are too high.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Eissaphobia
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 06 2021
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Grandpa took my weed so I took his wheelchair!

Ain’t nobody rolling shit around here

πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FlintTheDad
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 07 2020
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This helps weed out the weak.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 6k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/chocolaterush
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 04 2020
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I started drinking weed infused vodka

It keeps me in high spirits

πŸ‘οΈŽ 54
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Flazdude
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 18 2020
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Two gambling cows ate some weed.

The steaks were high.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 105
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/daddyflextape
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 23 2020
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The police say they burn all the weed they confiscate.

That would explain the doughnuts.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 13 2021
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My dad confiscated my weed so I stole his plane ticket.

I guess neither of us will be getting high.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 23
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 16 2020
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Why did the hippo want weed for Christmas?

He was a hippo pot a must. This is so dumb...I apologize now to all of you ha ha ha.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/catonmyshoulder69
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 05 2020
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What do you call a catholic leader that does weed?

A dope pope

πŸ‘οΈŽ 39
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hewbard
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 23 2020
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This is dope. (Yes, weed is illegal in India)
πŸ‘οΈŽ 126
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/golubeerji
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 18 2020
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I used to share weed with my friend

You could call it a trance-plant

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Schrodingers_liar
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 24 2020
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What did the weed say when confronting the piece of paper?

Im gonna be blunt with you,

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kneegears1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 23 2020
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My son was just arrested for possession of weed.

I told him to cut the grass not keep it in his pockets.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SkyCrossXD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2020
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I was surprised when I caught my son smoking weed upstairs...

I never imagined my house would have a drug attic.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 158
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/skeeball
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 06 2020
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The female janitor in my building asked if I would smoke some weed with her.

I said no; I can't deal with high maintenance women.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 155
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Indigo_Samurott
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2020
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What's your opinion on permitting coastal birds to smoke weed?

As I for one think that we should Seagullize Marijuana

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cnuttyforehead
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 08 2020
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What happens when two weed companies merge together?

They become a joint venture!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 23
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/maraudershake
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Are you smoking weed in this pandemic?

Coweed-19

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/amankhaan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 09 2020
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Yesterday I combined weed with yeast.

The Pot Thickens..

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Peanut_Butt3r675
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 19 2020
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What did the student do after smoking weed ?

Higher Studies.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/yaduteemon
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 29 2020
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"I don't have a single weed in my garden"

They're all married with children.....

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PhotographsWithFilm
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 02 2020
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I used to think toking weed and snorting lines of coke made me a cool guy

but it was all just smoke and mirrors.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 96
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 13 2020
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What should you do if you're addicted sea weed?

Sea kelp....

πŸ‘οΈŽ 49
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ElderHallow
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 18 2020
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Students can now enroll in weed-growing classes.

It's a high school.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DoomRulz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked a friend to help me weed my herb garden today.

He declined, well, it was probably the wrong thyme.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rahastes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 11 2020
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My wife told me to watch her plants when I sprayed the weed killer.

I've been watching them for an hour now and I don't see what's so interesting about them.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LetterZee
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 05 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend and I are starting a weed farm

It's a joint operation

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thats_awkward_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 07 2020
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Someone on weed said I look good.

It was high praise.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/13toycar
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My son got mad after I called his weed stupid

I said "Jeez cant you take a toke ?"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/datdragonfruittho
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Someone stole my weed...

I'm feeling very dis-jointed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
There was a fire in the illegal weed farm which trapped some cows.

The steaks have never been higher.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Team_Pineapple
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Thinking about opening a hotel for weed smokers.

I’m gone call it Swisha Suites. Lol!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MLSlate1324
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 20 2020
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What is a mexican fish's favorite weed?

Si weed

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/edgydonut
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 18 2020
🚨︎ report
The janitor lady just asked me to smoke some weed with her

I turned her down I don't like high maintenance women

πŸ‘οΈŽ 1k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/KillRespectively1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Grandma took my weed so I took her wheelchair.

Neither of us is rolling.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 39
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/johnreese421
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 20 2020
🚨︎ report

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