Want me to tell you water puns?
A pun is the humorous use of a word or phrase so as to emphasize or suggest its different meanings or applications, or the use of words that are alike or nearly alike in sound but different in meaning; a play on words
Water pun
R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist
Where do mansplainers get their water?
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it...
My friend said that he couldn't afford to pay his huge water bill....
So, I sent him a 'Get Well Soon' card.
My neighbour and I became good friends, so we decided to share our water supply.
How do you make a water bed more bouncy?
Someone asked me to name 2 structures that hold water.
If H20 is water, what's H2O4?
Dear Optimist, Pessimist and Realist. While you were arguing about the glass of water, I drank it.
Spilled some water in chemistry class today
My wife was making gravy for dinner, and she added some corn starch, but it got too thick. To thin it out she added some water, but then it was too thin again. It went back and forth a few times before I said...
Ahh. I get it. It’s a viscous cycle.
Look! I'm a water Bender!
What vessels sail the waters of the Chinese internet?
What pokemon shoots holy water?
What letter holds the most water?
C.
(My eight-year-old just told me this and got me.)
my friend just told me, 'I hope you die in a deep hole filled with water'.
what did the depressed water park attendant think of at the top of a high rise building?
Condensation really isn't the best way to water your lawn...
Instead of water, I accidentally put RedBull in the the back of my coffee maker this morning.
I was halfway to work before I realized I forgot my car.
Why do Dogs float on water?
Because they're good buoys.
(This may be a classic but I still like it)
A German tourist jumped off to the freezing water to save my precious dog who was drowning.
After he climbed out he said, "Here is ze dog, dry him off and he vill be fine."
I said, "Are you a vet?"
To which he replied, annoyed; "Vet? I'm fucking zoaking."
How do you tell the sex of an ant? You drop it in water. It sinks: girl ant. It floats:...
My wife just yelled that I should fall in a pit or hole sunk into the earth to reach a supply of water and die.
Which weighs more, a gallon of water or a gallon of butane?
A gallon of water. Butane is lighter fluid.
My friend keeps saying “Cheer up man, it could be worse. You could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.”
I've just found out my dog floats on water...
I had a friend join at cult that believes when they die they become water vapor
I told him they will be mist
So proud of my daughter for this one... "Why do fishes swim in salt water?"
Because pepper would make them sneeze!
She's six. She's awesome.
EDIT: Woo highest rated post, thanks to my kid. Also, I never said she wrote it! She just told it to me. So there.
Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?
He had a very esteemed colleague.
Why did the pony ask for a glass of water?
Because he felt like he was a little horse.
Do you know why scuba divers flip backwards when going into the water?
Because if they flipped forward, they'd fall into the boat.
I added water to our bread machine
I don’t know if it worked, but it kneaded it.
You can spell water as "hijklmno"
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill
So I sent him a "get well soon" card
My friend in the country couldn’t afford his water bill...
So I sent him a ‘Get Well Soon!’ card.
How do you make water bed more bouncy
My friend couldn’t afford to pay his water bill.
I sent him a “get well soon” card.
How do you make a water bed more bouncy?
How do you make holy water?
You take water and boil the hell out of it!
How do you make a water bed more bouncy
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it
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