No one ever addresses the elephant in the room.
They were all Baroque
They fired all Naan essential staff.
I guess what I'm trying to tell you is that Gandhi was a super fragile, calloused mystic suffering from halitosis.
Poor guy turned to a life of mime.
I asked her if it was going to be full color or just a sketch.
Some might say it's a harey situation.
My income is low-er and this maybe my career's financy low-year.
Unless you are a cannibal lion
I'm having a hard time getting this off my chest.
He was well-armed.
is between 7 and 9, average and mean.
You always have to start from scratch.
I had to sell my air guitar collection on ebay
They served Wookie steaks on the Death star.....they were a little Chewie...
Boy, do I miss her
All the ese-curves mean you gotta be on your toes.
... you might say it was exhausting 💨
Being tired and weary, the lawyer-onion isn't sure whether to go, but decides he needs cheering up.
So he dresses smartly, puts on his favorite aftershave and heads over to his friend's.
He gets to the party to find it quite a packed affair and heads over to the bar - fighting through crowds of reveller-onions - to get a drink.
As he gets to the bar, he notices in one corner a slightly out-of-place female onion.
She looks a bit sad and being the compassionate onion that he is, he heads over to talk to her.
This is quickly affirmed as a good move, as they hit it off immediately; she was abandoned by her friends shortly after arriving and had been minding her own business ever since, but over a night of drinks and talking, they quickly fall into an infatuation and soon end up spending an oniony night of passion together.
When they awake in the morning, they don't find it awkward and a steady relationship between the two is struck.
This lasts a good while, having its ups and downs like any college relationship, but eventually the day comes when they both graduate.
The two couldn't be happier!
They both get jobs close to one another and move into an apartment together.
One day, the partner-onion is anxiously awaiting the lawyer-onion at home.
She's been ill all day and checking has confirmed her suspicions.
She tearfully - and joyfully - breaks the news to the lawyer-onion; they're going to have a tiny baby-onion together.
A shallot, if you will.
A few days later, this prompts the lawyer-onion to propose to his heretofore girlfriend-onion.
They are soon wed, having a fantastic wedding-day and husband and wife-onions are on top of the world.
The day comes of the birth and no complications - a tiny, healthy baby onion is born to two proud parents.
Seeing this little bundle of oniony love in their arms causes them to fall deeper in love than ever.
Over the next few years, husband-and-wife-onions' lives are fantastic.
He's prospering at work, she's really enjoying taking some time to raise the baby-onion and over time the baby-onion grows into a hale and hearty toddler-onion, who then becomes a child-onion.
One day, the idyll of the onions' lives is shattered when tragedy strikes.
The lawyer-onion (now a partner-onion in a prestigious law firm due to chance and hard work) is at work, and mother-onion is washing dishes and watching her child play in the yard.
She glances away to take another plate and turns her vision back to
... keep reading on reddit ➡... was draining 💦
I’ve never heard him complain
I wouldn't mess with him lads. He's a cycle path.
but hay... It’s in my jeans.
He can’t seem to deal with the aftermath.
It makes a little dino sore.
...they hang out in crowbars.
Let the little shits be someone else’s problem.
People applauding because you got hit really hard.
Sorry for the Saab story.
0 Degrees.
It's hard to find thyme for it.
Believe me, I'm not lion.
Son (age 5): I don't want scrambled eggs for breakfast!
Me: What do you mean? You love scrambled eggs!
Son: I used to like them more but we've had them so much I don't like them anymore.
Me: Sounds like you're having... an egg-sistential crisis.
Son: ... what?
Me: Never mind, eat your eggs.
and I said I DON'T LIKE CHANGE, MOM
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