My high school bully still takes my lunch money.

But on the upside, he makes great Subway sandwiches!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
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*This is a literal Dad Joke my father used to tell when I was a kid about 30 years ago. He's almost 80 now and it still makes him laugh.* - So, there was this man named James Fart. Everybody made fun of him since he was very young. "James Fart! James Fart" the bullies used to make him cry...

He came of age among this suffering and at 21 was finally able to legally change his name. He arrived at the government office where he presented himself:

-I'm James Fart and I want to legally change my name!

Of course they laughed at him (everybody did) but eventually they all settled and came around to the situation.

-Ok, so... your current name is.. Β·chucklesΒ· James Fart... I'm sorry, I just...

-I know, everybody has been laughing at my name since as long as I can remember.

After a long and tedious process, everything is ready.

-Very well, sorry for the delays but you know how hard this protocols are. The good news: you are no longer "James Fart", what name do you want instead?

-Charles Fart.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gone11gone11
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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You really shouldn’t bully people that have iron deficiency.

After all, they can’t stand up for themselves.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JammerJake2005
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
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Why did the Books bully the online dictionary?

Because it is spineless

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TexasWegieee
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
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I was on a train when I noticed a bully nearby who were harassing another guy sitting next to me. The bully then shoved the other guy, who bumped into my hand. I got up, punched the bully and said "Not on my watch...

..it's a brand-new Rolex."

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wIXMamamama
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
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My high school bully once drew a zero on my face with a magic marker

He really did a number on me

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PygmeePony
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
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I used to bully someone in high school...

Now I'm the one with eczema face.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FranticFurret
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
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What happens if the average number of bullies at a school goes up?

The mean increases.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/timoteostewart
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2018
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First time doing this please no bully
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yycts
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
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What do you call a potato that bullies all the other potatoes?

A dick tater.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/7113dEv
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
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Dont worry if a tree tries to bully you...

They're all Bark and no bite

πŸ‘︎ 63
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πŸ‘€︎ u/InkJetPrinters
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2018
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Why do they bully me
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2019
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A man in a wheelchair stood up against a bully.

Everyone called him a liar.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Iliketrains4576
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2019
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Where do bullies like to hangout?

In the meantime...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tru-Queer
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
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When I went to culinary school, the bullies used to cover me with chocolate and cream, and then put a cherry on my head.

Life was tough in the gateau.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2018
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How did the 8th grader deal with the bully that wouldn't let him enter the restroom?

He had to fight. For his right. To POTTY!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fo_eyed_dog
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2019
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What do you call a bully alligator?

An Instigator

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SiLifino
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2018
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I was on a train when I noticed a bully nearby who were harassing another guy sitting next to me. The bully then shoved the other guy, who bumped into my hand. I got up, punched the bully and said "Not on my watch...

..it's a brand new Rolex."

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wIXMamamama
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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To this day, the boy that used to bully me at school still takes my lunch money.

On the plus side, he makes great Subway sandwiches.

πŸ‘︎ 147
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πŸ‘€︎ u/skylly100
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2019
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What happens when the average bullies in a school goes up.

The mean increases..

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CHEEZY_21
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
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What happens if the average number of bullies at a school goes up?

The mean increases!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2020
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What happens if the average number of bullies at a school goes up?

The mean increases!

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
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