What has 2 syllables but hundreds of letters?

Postman

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Elbobby89
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between a stressed and an unstressed syllable?

Vacation.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PeeSeaBayBee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
🚨︎ report
How many syllables does the word gloria have?

Christians: 18

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Puns for the name β€œLierin”? (Lee-air-in)

At my high school there’s a tradition for the seniors to get sweatshirts with punny names on the back. I’ve already thought of mine but my friend is at a loss. Her name is Lierin, accent on the second syllable, pronounced β€œLee-air-in”. any ideas?

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Because it’s true
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mister_Aitch
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
🚨︎ report
what rhymes with orange

no it doesn't

πŸ‘︎ 63
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ineedapapaya
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Let’s just ignore the fact that would cause mass traffic
πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife said, "Nothing rhymes with orange"

I said no

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyesboyee
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2019
🚨︎ report
β€œHey Watson, is that mud on your boots?”

β€œNo, shit, Sherlock.”

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Pun with numbers
πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Igknightor1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2018
🚨︎ report
I just love haikus.....but sometimes they dont make sense

Refrigerator

πŸ‘︎ 880
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FreshTatarSauce
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I wrote a poem

Time to learn haiku Syllables? Five seven five? Fuck it i give up

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kleefish
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that Gandhi never wore shoes? And due to his fasting he was very weak and had awful breath?

He was a super-fragile-calloused-mystic-hexed-by-halitosis

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Uchi_mata18
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
No gender differentiation here
πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/id_fuck_me_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2013
🚨︎ report
I got fired from my job at the pasta factory

I made a fusilli mistakes

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ropach
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2015
🚨︎ report
My boyfriend is gonna be a great dad one day.

I saw him picking up a quarter off the floor.

I said to him, "Is that where you keep all your quarters? That makes a lot of sense."

He says, "Yeah, 25 cents." then laughed for 5 minutes to himself, then kept laughing about it sporadically throughout the day.

Edit: I just wanna say thanks to my s/o /u/rainbowdongs for being so hilarious. <3 Happy anniversary! Love you!

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cruelhag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2014
🚨︎ report
Dad and daughter come into the restaurant I work at. He was crackin me up the whole time.

They are looking through the menu and the dad points to the falafel appetizer.

Dad: How do you pronounce that one?

Me: Falafel?

Dad: No actually I feel great! Just a little bit hungry..

Daughter: (Face palm)

.

EDIT: falafel sort of sounds like feel awful.

.

and again..

.

Dad orders his daughter a slice of cake for dessert.

Me: (to daughter) Here's your dessert. and (to the Dad) I brought you a fork in case you wanted some too.

Dad: Thanks! I love fork! (begins to pretend to eat fork)

Daughter: (absolutely mortified face of embarrassment.)

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Riggy60
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2013
🚨︎ report
Dad holds baby son.

Baby laughs and starts to coo.

β€œHai ku, I am dad.”

πŸ‘︎ 90
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bigjuicymelons
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2017
🚨︎ report
Those of you who've been to a Disney Park will get this... Dad Jokes: The Ride
πŸ‘︎ 99
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Zwitterions
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2013
🚨︎ report
Why did the two punsters get a divorce?

I reckon syllable differences.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ohitstuesday
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2016
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.