Got to stud-dee to get my de-gree in my fave subject, Pun-o-graphy !
Hot and fresh, made to order puns!
Do you need a pun? Just ask!
I can do puns with just one subject, puns that connect two subjects, pun pickup lines, and pun-chlines for jokes of the form "____ walks into a bar."
Just comment on this post with the subject you need a pun on, and I will get back to you as soon as possible.
I remember a time when plastic surgery was a taboo subject, but nowadays when you mention botox..
..no one even raises an eyebrow.
What's a bull's favorite subject?
Cow-culus.
(Courtesy of my 10 year old.)
My wife shouted, "You need to do more chores around the house!" Groaning, I pleaded, "Can we change the subject?" She smiled and calmly replied...
"Ok, more chores around the house need to be done by you."
My mates got cross with me for going on and on about how fun it is to drive stick. They suggested changing the subject.
I told them that I would shift as best I could...
What's a seal's favorite subject?
If you see an email with ground pork and processed ham in the subject line, don’t open it...
I asked my wife to rate my listening skills and she said, “You’re an 8 on a scale of 10.”
I still don’t get why she wanted me to urinate on a skeleton...
If anyone gets an email from me with the subject 'My meat', don't open it.
Guys, make your woman feel special. Place a framed photo of her in the kitchen...
....and write "EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH" on top.
What is a snake's favorite subject?
Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject
Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
The one subject I was bad at in school
What is a ghost’s favorite math subject?
My trigonometry teacher loves talking about unrelated subjects for a long time
I guess you could say that he sometimes goes off on a sin/cos
What's a witch's favorite subject?
If I had 50 cents for every maths Exam I failed
My kids got on the subject of lava & asked: “Can you drink it?!”
So I said, “Sure! But it’ll go right through you!”
What is a king's least favorite subject?
My least favorite subject in school was ancient history.
The teacher always tended to Babylon
My wife says I change subjects too often when I'm talking to people.
I'm glad it rained today so I don't need to water the lawn. Anyone else feel like pizza for dinner?
If I’m being subjective, the greatest sci-fi series of all time is Dr. Who.
If I’m being objective, it’s Dr. Whom.
Let’s start this off by breaking the ice. It’s a slippery subject, but I know we can crack it!
PSA: if you receive an email with the subject ding dong. Whatever you do, don’t open it.
It’s the Jehovah’s witnesses working from home
OPun (Open source Puns) database from my site released
Hopefully this post is allowed. 5 or so years ago, I decided to post puns that I either came up with or enjoyed a lot. My goal was to make it easy to find puns based on a topic or subject. So I heavily tagged all of the entries with relevant information. I've consistently uploaded new puns on at least a weekly basis, but usually every 3 days.
I've amassed a large collection that I've decided to open source. I've dumped my database into a JSON file that is open and free to use (with proper attribution).
Let me know what you think!
https://punatorium.com/opun
What is a fish's favorite subject?
Braille is a very touchy subject
My Dad told me he always struggled with three subjects in school;
Maths, and he couldn’t remember the other one.
On the subject of books, I also read one about the ocean.
What was the snake’s favorite subject in school?
why is life hard for the kittens who make the most adorable noises
they are subject to constant purr-so-cuteion
What subject does Dr Pepper specialize in?
What's Darth Vader's favorite subject?
Mechanics, Because it talks about the force.
Algebra was the easiest subject to learn in Ancient Rome.
I'm a primary school teacher and one of my kids got me in the lols with this one today... what's a witch's favorite subject?
Subject: weather
I’m curious as to how many puns can be fit into one comment before it no longer becomes funny.
I hate it when people say humour is only subjective.
Animals should be used to represent school subjects...
English should be a hawk, they have good eyes, and you need good eyes for reading.
History should be bowhead whales since they’ve lived through more than anyone else.
And finally, maths should be snakes, I hear they’re great Adders.
Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject?
Now you mention Botox and no one even raises an eyebrow.
My wife: You need to do more chores around the house.
Me: Can we change the subject?
My wife: Okay. More chores around the house need to be done by you.
What is a seals favorite subject?
My wife: You need to do more chores around the house.
Me: Can we change the subject?
Her: Ok. More chores around the house need to be done by you.
Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject?
Now you mention Botox and no one raises an eyebrow.
What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
What is a seal's favorite subject in school?
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