I get a charge out of sharing puns (from /r/funny) reddit.com/r/funny/commen…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Captain_Nerdrage
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2012
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Two women were sharing the same ID card

Sharon is Karen

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MomsSpoghetti
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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Do you know what’s wrong about sharing COVID dad jokes?

It may take you two weeks to get it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/furbiever
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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Why are hippies always sharing their joints?

Because they lead a doobie-us lifestyle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mynameistory
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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its not mine but i found this and thought it was good so i am sharing it
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FortraVox
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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Sharing this
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RogueDisciple
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
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No sharing
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ickniz
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
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What do you call the ride sharing lanes that cut through the mountains?

Carpool tunnel

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pure_evil1979
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
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My 8 years old invented this one and I am proudly sharing it with you all

Dad, do you know what an olive is? A sick grape.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ppmartins
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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Look out for cold sores when sharing candy this Valentine's day...

Mine went from Mounds of Joy to Herpes Kisses.

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
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In the spirit of sharing our kids attempts at dad jokes,

My daughter had to wire an essay about her hobby, which is softball. Her opener:

Pitcher this, you’re standing on a mound.

I was overwhelmed, and more proud than ever. She threw in some other puns too, it was an excellent essay, she’s giving me a run for my money, I batter watch out.

Edit: thank you u/PsychicGnome for the reminder that my kids are better parents than I am

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OnionShanty
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
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Two people fell in love as they were sharing Gems candy. What do you call their relationship?

Bond, Gems Bond.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madjholu
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2020
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Most definitely stolen and a repost but sharing anyway. imgur.com/28438Sk
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lord_Phoenix95
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2017
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I just created a word for sharing Sperm.

Cummunism.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SergeantPotatoes
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2020
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For over 30,000 years humans gave each other social "likes" by sharing beads made from ostrich eggs.

I guess you might call them emu-jis.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2020
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What do you call two monkeys sharing an amazon account?

Prime-mates

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SebastianLi1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
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behold the sharing-nyan
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BOTKhan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2019
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Did you hear that the singer Seal left a night club event because of the revellers sharing derogatory poems about him?

He was dissed by the prose at a rave.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yetanotherrob
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
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2 monkeys are sharing a bath

#1: ooh Oeh ah ah!

#2: oh sorry, is it too hot?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Absolute1790
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
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The FBI has been hunting me down for sharing their master passkey. It rhymes with approved and it’s spelled

[removed]

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GPyleFan11
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
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What do you call a male student's society sharing a common belief in a flat earth?

A flaternity.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/steelpan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
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Sharing chips isn't just funny

Its side splitting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eastwind45
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2019
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A disease has been discovered where musicians temporarily lost their ability to tell which notes are which when sharing an automobile with a stranger.

Medical experts have named it "carpool tonal syndrome".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thefizzynator
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2016
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Sharing is caring
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Relacrosse31
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2018
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I tried picking up this girl today by sharing my extensive knowledge of the Titanic, but she wasn't impressed.

I guess you could say it wasn't a very effective ice breaker.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Godredd
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
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Two eggs are sharing yolks, what does one egg say to the other?

I'm cracking up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/msaldierna315
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2018
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What do you call a dispensary and psychiatrist sharing rental space ?

Chronic Issues.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Failedcasserole
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2018
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Jake from Vsauce 3 just made a pun worth sharing. It's a shame his location wasn't "Toyko" though.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TimisD
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2014
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Why didn't the prawn like sharing?

Because it was a little shellfish.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kiwicanary
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2017
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Me sharing article: emoji snake takes 8 years to breed

Dad: Wow, that snake is so slow... It took me only a few hours to start breeding once I was married...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mewurby
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2018
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I've been sharing a ride to work and whenever we drive underground, my wrist hurts.

Doctor says it's carpool tunnel.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/edhere
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2017
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My first dad joke worth sharing.

My son asked me if I had any tissues left. I asked him if used the ones in the bathroom up as well. When he responded in the affirmative, I dropped this one on him:

"You really blow through this stuff, don't you?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hanktheskeleton
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2013
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My wife was talking about sharing absinthe with friends.

I observed that absinthe makes the heart grow fonder.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tard_farts
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2015
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My Dad finally said something worth sharing!

Me: So I'll see you tomorrow morning around 8:15?

Dad: Yup, be there or be an equilateral quadrilateral!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/alexl1
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2014
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If we're sharing foreign dad jokes.

This all happened in french so you none french speaking folk might not find this very funny. I saw /u/OHDEERGOAT post his Swedish dad joke and it reminded me of this. On a road trip a while back, I spotted some sort of bird of prey (means rapasse in french, which also sounds like repasse which means to return) so I tell my GrandPa about it. He says, "you know kid, bird of prey, Γ§a passe et Γ§a rapasse."

He's dead now, but we will all remember him for his sense of humour.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2014
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Been sharing it ever since

Dad: Have you heard about the concrete truck that hit the penitentiary up the road?

Me: No, I haven't.

Dad: 12 hardened criminals escaped.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/suedestacks
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2013
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