The doctor looked at me with a concerned look on his face and rasped, "Sir, I'm afraid your DNA is backwards."

I screamed, "AND!?"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 24
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 19 2019
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With trembling hands, my doctor looked up from my x-ray and stammered, "This is exactly what I was afraid of." Gripping my chest, I rasped, "What?"

Eyes wide, he whispered, "Skeletons!"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 380
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/madazzahatter
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 03 2018
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Which fruit has the hardest time saying anything?

Rasp-berries!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/darkanine9
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 29 2020
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I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you donโ€™t.โ€ And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town canโ€™t be buried here.โ€ I was really confused so I asked why?

He rasped, "Cuz theyโ€™re still alive!"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 86
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/madazzahatter
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 26 2020
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We once were questioning a perp who wouldn't say anything without his coarse file with cutting points instead of lines. After getting it, he immediately confessed...

He talked with a rasp.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 30 2020
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An Australian is walking over to a friend to say hi.

All of a sudden, his friend pulls out a gun and shoots him. As the Australian is bleeding out on the ground, he rasps, โ€œgood aim, mate.โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Undercover-Cactus
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 21 2019
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I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you donโ€™t.โ€ And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town canโ€™t be buried here.โ€ I was really confused so I asked why?

He rasped, "Cuz theyโ€™re still alive!"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9k
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 28 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report

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