The doctor looked at me with a concerned look on his face and rasped, "Sir, I'm afraid your DNA is backwards."

I screamed, "AND!?"

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2019
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With trembling hands, my doctor looked up from my x-ray and stammered, "This is exactly what I was afraid of." Gripping my chest, I rasped, "What?"

Eyes wide, he whispered, "Skeletons!"

πŸ‘︎ 380
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2018
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Which fruit has the hardest time saying anything?

Rasp-berries!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/darkanine9
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
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I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don’t.” And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can’t be buried here.” I was really confused so I asked why?

He rasped, "Cuz they’re still alive!"

πŸ‘︎ 86
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
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We once were questioning a perp who wouldn't say anything without his coarse file with cutting points instead of lines. After getting it, he immediately confessed...

He talked with a rasp.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
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An Australian is walking over to a friend to say hi.

All of a sudden, his friend pulls out a gun and shoots him. As the Australian is bleeding out on the ground, he rasps, β€œgood aim, mate.”

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Undercover-Cactus
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2019
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I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don’t.” And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can’t be buried here.” I was really confused so I asked why?

He rasped, "Cuz they’re still alive!"

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
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