Why did the scarecrow get the job promotion?
He was outstanding in his field.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 21 2021
My wife was a captain in the Army Reserve. She told me she had a promotion and asked me to attend the ceremony. I donβt know much about the Army,
...but I understand this promotion was a major ordeal.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Apr 05 2021
I walked into my boss' office to tell him I'd like to be considered for a promotion.
I sat in the chair and said, "Boss, I want a higher position."
"Well, if you push that lever," he said, pointing by my legs, "the chair will go up."
π︎ 5
π
︎ Apr 02 2021
Gatorade should run some kind of charity promotion where they raise funds to help preserve endangered species of alligator.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Feb 23 2021
Why did the sporting goods employee get denied a promotion?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Feb 14 2021
I got a promotion at the crematorium.
My boss told me I urned it.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jan 11 2021
Sorry for self promotion.
π︎ 30
π
︎ Nov 05 2020
My local bakery has a martial arts promotion going on
They allow you to take-one-dough.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Sep 29 2020
I was wondering if this group could help me come up with puns for my husbands promotion watch. Itβs an omega speedmaster. He loves puns and I am truest bad at them.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 09 2020
Shameless self-promotion
π︎ 13
π
︎ May 26 2020
My buddy Jesus got promoted to a supervisory position and I got to choose the music for his promotion party.
I went with "Your Own Personnel Jesus"
π︎ 5
π
︎ Mar 17 2020
I was all set to celebrate my promotion at work when my son came home and said he was voted king of his class...
He really reigned on my parade.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Jan 18 2020
Somebody give a promotion to the person writing these descriptions.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Mar 28 2019
I got a promotion at the ladder company
You could say Iβm stepping up in the world.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Oct 28 2019
A French guy was telling his American friend how he just had got a promotion...
"Nice" - the American guy said. Then the French guy replied:
"What does my hometown has to do with it?"
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 17 2019
I got a big promotion! I'm now the Electronic Innovation and Entertainment Information Officer for Elderly McDonald's Agricultural Enterprises.
I can't wait to put E.I.E.I.O. on my resume!
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 02 2019
Why did the milk bottle get a promotion?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 22 2019
Our neighborhood roofing business is having a great promotion right now.
If you buy a roof, itβs on the house.
π︎ 18
π
︎ May 31 2019
I just got a promotion as Director at the Old MacDonald farm.
π︎ 9
π
︎ May 06 2019
I was going to receive a promotion at work soon so I bought the book "What to Expect When You're Expecting" to help me find out what to expect.
It turns out that the book was not what I expected at all.
π︎ 17
π
︎ Jan 06 2019
A colon got a promotion at work.
They call him the ascending colon.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Feb 19 2019
To attract new visitors, the Museum of Natural History ran a promotion where they gave away actual dinosaur vertebrae from their collection.
Everyone was taken aback.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Oct 20 2018
Did you see the new 711 promotion?
bring a gun and everything is free.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 03 2019
Did you hear about the monkey's promotion?
He's the new branch manager
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 11 2018
My friend just got a huge promotion at the pickle factory...
Turns out, he's a pretty big dill.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Feb 20 2018
I'm happy I'm getting a promotion at work, but sad I'm going to have to shave my beard.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Aug 17 2017
Today I got my dad and a job promotion.
>Me: Dad, I just got a new job and the only applicants were me, myself, and I.
>Dad: So you were the best candidate.
>Me: Well no, Me and Myself declined the job, so of course I took it.
I am to young to be a dad.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Feb 27 2015
Why was the scarecrow given a promotion?
Because he was out-standing in his field
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 18 2015
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
π︎ 72
π
︎ Nov 09 2020
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
π︎ 79
π
︎ Dec 19 2020
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
π︎ 25
π
︎ Oct 18 2020
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was out standing in his field.
π︎ 37
π
︎ Oct 22 2020
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
π︎ 13
π
︎ Aug 22 2020
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was outstanding in his field......
π︎ 10
π
︎ Jun 25 2020
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
He was outstanding in his field!
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 29 2020
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Cause he was outstanding in his field.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Aug 30 2019
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
He was outstanding in his field.
π︎ 16
π
︎ May 21 2019
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jul 24 2019
Did you hear about the scarecrow who got a promotion?
He was out standing in his field.
π︎ 46
π
︎ Oct 01 2018
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was outstanding in his field
π︎ 9
π
︎ May 11 2019
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
He was outstanding in his field.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Apr 06 2019
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
He was out standing in his field
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 12 2019
I got a promotion at the farm
π︎ 26
π
︎ Aug 06 2018
Why did the cow get a promotion?
Why did the cow get a promotion?
She was outstanding in her field.
π︎ 65
π
︎ May 27 2014
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
π︎ 42
π
︎ Jun 17 2017
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion at work?
He was out standing in his field
π︎ 31
π
︎ Oct 17 2013
You know why the scarecrow got a promotion?
Because he was out standing in his field.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jun 19 2016
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
He was out standing in his field.
π︎ 74
π
︎ Jun 28 2013
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