What do you call it when you shave outdoors?

Daylight shaving time

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dgml14
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2021
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Was in my local gardening centre looking at outdoor floor boards when the owner asked me if I wanted decking?

Luckily I got the first punch in.

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
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Aah the outdoors.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trooper_97
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
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Where do folks from Bilbao, Spain buy outdoor equipment?

The Basque Pro Shop

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mapguy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
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I went to an outdoor mall today and there was guy misting water at people as they walked by. My wife quickly avoided him.

Mister mister missed her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zedhead0628
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
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Did you hear about all the competition in the outdoor pickled cabbage contest?

It was a krauted field.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/citrusguy9
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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Why should people with heart disease avoid sleeping outdoors?

Because camping is in tents.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Y2KoNo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
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McDonald's now has outdoor seating again

Just wanted to give you that little nugget

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Andexm
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2020
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My 6 year old daughter has lined up all of her dolls towards the outdoor grill...

Looks like she’s preparing some kind of Barbie queue...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
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My boss said that an outdoor concert was fine this fourth of July celebration despite the forecast f rain...

Just so I cover all the bassists.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2020
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Do you know what the most intense outdoor activity is?

Camping.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
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Shopping at foreign outdoor markets

Is just bazaar.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Serinitatis
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2018
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In my town, there was a court case between a husband and wife about who owned an outdoor storage building.

In the end, the judge dismissed it because the only evidence was "he shed, she shed".

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
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Why don’t computer programmers like the outdoors?

Because there’s too many bugs

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WillieTplayz
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2019
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My friend caught hypothermia while painting outdoor scenes in Northern Canada.

Everyone thinks he needed a second coat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
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Walking around some outdoor shops yesterday...

...we passed by a decorative stone speaker playing some music.

My three-year old: "What's that?"

Not wanting to let the moment slip I simply replied:

"Oh, that's just some rock music."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MarkovManiac
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2017
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I always think about getting a job estimating crowd sizes for different outdoor events.

I wonder how many people are in that field.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2018
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The wife was nattering on and on at the outdoor maze, it was hard for me to say anything.

i couldn't get a word in hedgeways

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rethinkr
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
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When I was little, we went to an outdoor lecture featuring the original cast of Star Trek. I was especially excited to see Bones. Unfortunately, we were seated toward the side of the amphitheater, where huge oaks had been planted to frame the stage.

As a result, I couldn't see DeForest through the trees

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πŸ‘€︎ u/confibulator
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2018
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Ad appeared in personal ads section.... Middle aged outdoors man, avid bass fisherman looking for like minded single woman with a bass boat....

Send picture of boat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/manicmoose13
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
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I dont like outdoor markets

I think they are bazaar

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2018
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I called the police because a man was screaming about large bodies of water and outdoor storage units, but when the police arrived they couldn't arrest him, as he denied everything.

It was a real "He Said Sea Shed" situation.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maimonides_vii
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2018
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You know what my favorite winter outdoor activity is?

Coming back inside.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2018
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Got my friends at an outdoor restaurant

The wind was high and dirt blew on us. As everyone was rubbing their eyes I said "one day we'll all look back on this day fondly. I'm sedimental like that." Groans ensued.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/headexpl0dy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2016
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Why should people with heart disease avoid sleeping outdoors?

Because camping is in tents.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Y2KoNo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2020
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My 6 year old daughter has lined up all of her dolls towards the outdoor grill.

Looks like she is preparing some kind of barbie queue.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2019
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