My friend asked if i was getting an Oasis with my meal.

I said maybe

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ps_arya
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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I was at a restaurant the other day and ordered the Oasis soup because

You got a roll with it

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Towsey-
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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Two cowboys walking through the plains, no food or water, death imminent. When through hazy vision one of them spies a tree, covered in bacon by an oasis of pure clean. One cowboy hide behind a rock, as his confused friend runs to the tree... only to be gunned down by some bandits.

The second cowboy is relieved to be alive, and thankful that he knew that that was no bacon tree.

It was a ham bush

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MafiaCub
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
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Just been to Noel and Liam Gallaghers new restaurant and had Oasis soup

You get a roll with it.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stoatwobbler
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
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My wife asked me to stop listening to Oasis

I said maybe.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Costabza
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2019
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My kids want me to stop singing Oasis songs.

I said maybe.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/I_pund_you_n00b
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
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My son keeps asking me if will I ever stop making Oasis jokes

I said maybe

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paoerfuuul
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2019
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Why did Liam Gallagher (Oasis) order the soup?

Because you got a roll with it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Otistetrax
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2017
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My wife said she'd leave me unless I stop constantly singing Oasis songs…

I said maybe.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2016
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I ran into my sibling while exploring the Sahara Desert.

I yelled out, "Oasis!"

Edit: My first ever attempt at a dad joke, and i never thought i would get anywhere this much upvotes. Thank y'all so much!

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/redneckvet
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend angrily asked me if I would ever stop singing Wonderwall

I said maybe..

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wildezgaming
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Don't be sad.

Because sad backwards is Das. And Das no good.

πŸ‘︎ 79
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jbab1968
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2017
🚨︎ report
Two guys were stranded in a desert.

The first guy was named Jim and the second guy was named Joe. They were starving, and dying of thirst. They kept walking in one direction hoping that they would get out of the desert before they died. They had been lost a long time, and it wasn't looking good.

Then, in a stroke of good luck, they found an oasis. In the oasis there was plenty of water and trees growing. On the trees, was every kind of bacon imaginable. Crispy bacon, soft bacon, even Canadian bacon (even though it doesn't really count). Joe says, "I'm going to go eat some bacon."

So Joe goes and gets some bacon out of a low tree.

Just as he takes his first bite, a gremlin jumps out of the foliage, and stabs him in the back with a knife.

Joe is laying on the ground dying, and his friend Jim comes up to him. Joe says in a warning, "Jim run away. It's not safe here!"

"Why not?" Jim asked.

"This oasis isn't what it seems! It isn't a bacon tree, IT'S A HAM-BUSH!!!"

And he died.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xnightshade2
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2017
🚨︎ report
His friend went to Africa

Dad: Did I tell you? One of my co-workers went on a vacation to Africa a little while ago.

Me: What? No, that's awesome!

Dad: The resort was in the style of an oasis, so when he looked out the balcony he could see the rolling desert for miles! He told me there was wildlife everywhere out there too. Said a big group of elephants went running by one night.

Me: Really? That's crazy, I'm so jealous!

Dad: Yeah. He said another went by the next day wearing a pair of sunglasses.

Me: Wait... what?

Dad: I asked him if it was the same group and he said, "I couldn't tell, they were wearing sunglasses!"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/macswishbliket
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2013
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me to stop quoting Oasis

I said maybe

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gimel182
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me to stop singing Wonderwall by Oasis

I said maybe.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tylarias
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2016
🚨︎ report
My son asked me to stop singing Oasis songs in public...

I said maybe

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/outofoffice247
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife demanded i stop singing that Oasis song.

I said, "Hey now!"

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ganders81
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2017
🚨︎ report
What was so good about Oasis Soup?

You got a roll with it.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HideTheGarlic
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2017
🚨︎ report

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