We were all excited about our mountaineering trip, but then our friend Max chickened out.
He has always been an anti climb Max.
I joined a two-man mountaineering team and my wife wasn't happy.
She said she was leaving me after seeing other people behind my back.
What game do mountaineering rabbis like to play with their kids?
“So what’s it like living in the mountains?”
It’s got it’s ups and downs
The local bartender moved his pub to the summit of a mountain and the quality of his drinks improved
He really raised the bar on that one
Mountains are not just funny...
This mountain just installed a new CPU and processor into his pc.
It's now running on peak performance
Which mountains have the best nuts?
Disclaimer: this is my 5 year old son's joke. He is a dad in the making. "Everest is the biggest mountain. Mount Fuji is the prettiest. Which mountain is the stinkiest?"
What's the difference between a gymnast jaguar, and a meth-head mountain lion?
One is an acrobatic cat.
The other is a broke, addict cat.
Why did they build the university on a mountain?
It was a place of higher learning.
Lost on a mountain, you can collect rainwater to drink during storms.
Otherwise, you just have to make dew.
Why are people that live on mountains smarter?
Because they have high-schools
Can you believe people actually eat mountain oysters?
Why do mountains make good comedians?
Because they're hill areas...
Don’t ever go to the local mountains and try to rent skis.
You can only get snowbored.
I built a model of Mt.Everest and my son asked, "Is it to scale?" I replied "No."
What did the mountain say to the funny highlands?
What do you get when you cross a bear and a mountain lion together?
Mountain lions are very rarely spotted in the wild...
That’s because mountain lions aren't spotted, cheetahs are!
Anyone listened to the mountain joke?
If not u should cause it’s hil-arious
I enjoyed hiking up mountains, until I arrived at the top.
From there, it's all downhill.
The reason the mountains are hill areas joke gets reposted so often is
I saw a mountain with a lot of cows hanging out on it.
Must've been Mount Heiferest.
My co-workers and I would suffer from wrist pain when we would drive through a mountain on our way to work together
We were diagnosed with carpool tunnel syndrome
What did one mountain say to the other after the earthquake?
True story: I was a kid, watching TV in our living room. My dad was outside using the grill. All of a sudden he bursts in the door hopping on one foot yelling “I stepped on a Bee!”
I was so concerned I jumped up and ran over to him...
Earlier that day my friend and I who were really into mountain biking had been using really sticky letters to put our names on our bikes. We were working near the general area of the BBQ.
Apparently I had dropped one...
Stuck to the bottom of my dads foot was the letter B....
A legendary dad joke from a legendary dad.
A mountain makes the best jokes.
The nation of Iran lies between the ancient lands of Babylon to the west and the mountains of Afghanistan to the east...
In other words, it’s between Iraq and a hard place.
I was really scared when I got lost climbing some mountains recently, but I found a map, a topographical map...
What do you call a group of sightless mountaineers?
I got so tired while climbing a tall mountain in Nepal.
I did not think I would Everest.
Why are you bringing me to this mountain river after our couple therapy session?!
Our therapist said I need to valley date you.
Sad to report the death of the founder of Dulux paint. He died this morning from hypothermia on top of a mountain.
It's been reported he could have done with another coat.
After a long hike to the top of a mountain, my wife asked me, “So what do you think of The View?”
I said, “Whoopi Goldberg is ok, but I don’t like the other women on the show.”
What do you call it when a mountain makes a joke
mountains arent just funny...
The mountains aren't just funny, they're
Why are mountains so funny ?
Because they are hill areas.
I explained, "You see son, mountains aren't just funny…"
mountains aren’t funny, they’re hill areas 🥸
Mountains aren’t just funny
Mountain ranges aren't just funny...
I built a model of Mount Everest and my son asked, “Is it to scale?” I replied, “No…”
I explained, "You see son, mountains aren't just funny…"
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