My dad: You know what they say... A Mayan is a terrible thing to waste. Me: Who says that?

My dad: Not the Spanish!

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📅︎ Feb 08 2020
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Running a Mayan school must have been difficult

After all you had to make sure the kids didn't sacrifice their principals.

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📅︎ Jan 05 2020
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Do you know why people still refer to the Mayan Calendar even today?

Because the alternative is too Incansistent.

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📅︎ Jun 18 2017
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Mayan Ruins

One of my physical therapy patients recently came back from a cruise, explaining one of his experiences at the Mayan ruins and pulled this one out, "I was walking around, Mayan my own business"

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📅︎ Feb 17 2016
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I could tell you a time travel joke...

... But you didn't like it

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👤︎ u/trtzbass
📅︎ Jul 13 2018
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Paul Ryan Puns

Paul Ryan is running for president. But after this, he'll be Paul Cryan.

His favorite color is Paul Cyan

He is Paul Tryan to become president

This post will make him Paul Diean

He read history about the Paul Mayan

On a plane, he is Paul Flyan

In Russia, he is Paul Spyan

He goes to the Maul Ryan

To go Paul Buyan

His favorite spice is Paul Cayenne

When he stares, heis Paul Eyean

For breakfast, he is Paul Fryan

On stilts, he is Paul Giant

When in trouble, he starts Paul Liean

When he watches memes, he is Lol Ryan.

His favorite is Paul Nyan

For dessert, he has Paul Piean

At this point, Im Paul Sighan

When he has rope, he is Paul Tiean

When curious, he is Paul Whyan

Or Paul Pryan

His new game is Ball Ryan

On the phone, he is Call Ryan

His daughter plays with Doll Ryan

When he trips, he is Fall Ryan

His house is the Ryan Hall

Again on stilts, he is Tall Ryan

His house has a Wall Ryan

Down south, you are Yall Ryan

When he makes bread, it is Paul Rysan

On a horse, he is Paul Ridan

In a fight, he is Brawl Ryan

When he loses he is Crawl Ryan

Or dead

When moving he uses a U-Haul Ryan

In the bathroom, he is Stall Ryan

I had a list with A LOT more. Help in diese comments!

EDIT: If he wins the election, he's Mr. President

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📅︎ Jun 02 2015
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Uncle-joked my niece in Mexico...

We went to the Mayan ruins near Tulum instead of the beachfront .

My 8 year old niece when asked if she was enjoying the day: "It's pretty boring. I wish we could go the beach."

Me: "Sorry that we 'ruined' your day."

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📅︎ Dec 01 2014
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