Magnolia stellata Puns

I'm in the process of finalizing the plan for the aquatic portion of my paludarium and just wanted to get some thoughts on it from people with experience keeping fish. I'm pretty sure I covered everything aside from a few specific water parameters but let me know if there's something I missed.

Full enclosure plan (the terrestrial portion is not finalized). I'll be drilling holes for bulkheads in the back of the tank for the canister filter and the waterfall will be in the back right corner. The pump will sit right next to or in front of the filter outflow.

The rocks will not necessarily be in those positions. I'm just using them to prop up that piece of wood for now.

Equipment: Yes, I know my equipment is extremely overpowered for the volume of water.

• Tank: 36” x 18” x 36” Exo Terra
• Lighting: Fluval Plant Spectrum 3.0
• Canister Filter: Oase Biomaster Thermo 250
• Waterfall Pump: Oase OptiMax 250

Environment: I got the gallon measurement from measuring the dimensions of the water area and converting the in^(3) into gallons. I will most likely set the water heater to about 77°F because I'd rather it be closer to the cooler side and lucky 7's. The substrate will be about 2" deep.

• Volume: 6 - 7 gallons
• Temperature: 75°F - 80°F
• Sunrise: 6:00AM - 8:00AM
• Sunset: 6:00PM - 8:00PM
• Hardscape: Ghostwood, Lava Rock
• Substrate: CaribSea Eco-Complete (Black), Magnolia Leaves, Seed Pods

Water Parameters: I got these numbers from testing my tap water multiple times and researching the water parameters for the fish and plants I plan on keeping. Although I understand the basics of water parameters (nitrogen cycle, water hardness, etc), I don't know much about how to get to my desired water hardness and how my pH may change after cycling. Will I have a hard time achieving my desired parameters given my tap water parameters? What will I need to do? Do I need to do anything?

• Tap Water Parameters
  • pH: 7.4 - 7.6
  • °KH: 6 (~110 ppm)
  • °GH: 12 (~215 ppm)
  • Ammonia: 0.25 - 0.5 ppm
  • Nitrites: 0 ppm
  • Nitrates: 4 - 8 ppm
• Desired Water Parameters
  • pH: 7.0 - 7.5
  • °KH: 10 - 30

Do your worst!

Turns out I hit the jackpot. Using my phone GPS, here's a list of every species of native wild-growing tree (or at least species with tree potential) within 250ft of my house. That is, this list does not include any exotic species or anything planted or transplanted. There are 37 species within 250ft.

Quercus alba - white oak
Q. stellata - post oak
Q. montana - chestnut oak
Q. rubra - northern red oak
Q. falcata - southern red oak
Q. velutina - black oak
Q. coccinea - scarlet oak
Q. marilandica - blackjack oak
Q. nigra - water oak

Carya tomentosa - mockernut hickory
C. glabra - pignut hickory
C. ovalis - red hickory
C. pallida - sand hickory

Pinus palustris - longleaf pine
P. echinata - shortleaf pine
P. virginiana - Virginia pine
P. taeda - loblolly pine

Prunus serotina - black cherry
P. alabamensis - Alabama cherry

Rhus glabra - smooth sumac
R. copallinum - winged sumac

Juniperus virginiana - eastern red cedar
Oxydendrum arboreum - sourwood
Vaccineum arborea - farkleberry
Fagus grandifolia - American beech
Liriodendron tulipifera - tulip poplar
Liquidambar styraciflua - American sweetgum
Diospyros virginiana - American persimmon
Aralia spinosa - Devil's walkingstick
Ilex opaca - American holly
Sassafras albidum - sassafras
Cornus florida - flowering dogwood
Amelanchier arborea - downy serviceberry
Crataegus collina - spotted hawthorn
Acer rubrum - red maple
Nyssa sylvatica - black tupelo
Asimina parviflora - smallflower pawpaw

If we go to 1000ft, which includes a small pond and creek, then we can include the following to bring the total up to 52 species:

Acer floridanum - southern sugar maple
Alnus serrulata - hazel alder
Carpinus caroliniana - American hornbeam
Magnolia virginiana - sweetbay magnolia
Symplocos tinctoria - sweetleaf
Rhododendron canascens - Piedmont azalea
Kalmia latifolia - mountain laurel
Halesia carolina - Carolina silverbell
Baccharis halimifolia - groundsel tree
Crataegus spathulata - littlehip hawthorn
Fraxinus pennsylvanica - green ash
Ilex verticillata - common winterberry
Chionanthus virginicus - fringe tree
Hamamelis virginiana - common witch hazel
Sambucus canadensis - elderberry

Within a mile we get to 64 species:

Acer negundo - boxelder
Juglans nigra - black walnut
Aesculus pavia - red buckeye
Populus heterophylla - swamp cottonwood
Magnolia tripetala - umbrella magnolia
Platanus occidentalis - Americ

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.