Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, there’s a long break in the ledge they can’t cross. β€œSomething for this I have.” Yoda says.

He reaches into his bag and takes out a bunch of regular dinner table forks and a roll of duct tape.

He tapes several forks together to make a bridge and lays it down, allowing the two of them to get across.

When they get back to Yoda’s hovel, they find that some creature has chewed a hole in the fence around Yoda’s garden.

β€œSomething I have for this.” Yoda says again. Once again, he takes a bunch of forks out of his bag and, using duct tape, tapes them in to patch the hole.

Yoda and Luke return to Yoda’s home, where Yoda looks through his bag. He’s used all his forks but one, he discovers.

β€œThat’s ok Master." Luke says, wanting to be helpful. β€œI’ll write us a note reminding us to buy more.”

So he writes the note and uses the very last fork to pin it to the bulletin board.

He looks down at Yoda expecting pride, but instead finds a look of horror.

β€œMaster Yoda!” he asks. β€œWhat did I do wrong?”

Yoda replies sagely, β€œA Jedi uses the forks for no ledge and the fence. Never for a tack!”

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a man who falls off a rocky ledge but holds on long enough to

Cliff Hanger... Or Mr Hanger if your being formal.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
🚨︎ report
A physicist see a man about to jump from a ledge. He yells.

"Don't do it! You have so much potential!"

πŸ‘︎ 80
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hadeon_
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, there’s a long break in the ledge they can’t cross... reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FarPrince
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Betting on the man jumping off a ledge

Two clowns were watching the late evening news. The current news story was about a man up on a ledge and threatening to jump. The station then cut to a commercial.

The first clown said, β€œI bet you $20 he’s going to jump.”

The second clown repliedΒ  β€œOkay, it’s a bet!”

(Back to newscast.) The man jumped.

The second clown, being a good sport, pulled out a twenty dollar bill and handed it to the other clown. β€œOkay. Here’s my $20.”

However, the first clown refused, saying β€œNo, I can’t take it.”

The second clown replied, β€œI insist. I lost the bet fair and square.”

The first clown said, β€œI have a confession to make. I saw the same thing on the 6:00 news and knew he jumped. So it wasn’t really a fair bet.”

But the second clown replied, β€œI know. I saw the same newscast. But I didn’t think he would be stupid enough to jump twice!”

http://bestcleanfunnyjokes.com/betting-on-the-man-jumping-off-a-ledge/

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tfraymond
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
🚨︎ report
A big moron and a little moron were sitting on a ledge, when a gust of wind blew one of them off. Which one fell off?

The big one, because the other was a little moron.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Joesdad65
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2019
🚨︎ report
When it comes to metaphors about knowledge, no ledge is too high to aspire to
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thisguysucks2much
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2019
🚨︎ report
The roof ledge of the library is missing.

That building has knowledge!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dubante_Viro
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What does a hawk call a high ledge?

A falcony!

πŸ‘︎ 77
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/_potaTARDIS_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2015
🚨︎ report
My brother ran up to photograph a cow near a cliff

He said it was 'ledge and dairy.'

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kdlaz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
Talking with my brother: β€œHey remember when we would see how far we could jump off the staircase?”

β€œThat just sounds like leaping off ledges with extra steps”

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ovrlymm
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I was drinking my milkshake on a cliff and thought

Wow this is ledge β€˜n dairy

πŸ‘︎ 14k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/changhaobyu
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Met the inventor of the windowsill the other day.

Absolute ledge.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/clown-homie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Cows standing on a cliff aren't just cool,...

They're ledge-end-dairy.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Boggart75
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I dragged a quart of milk 3,000ft up El Capitan in Yosemite this week

I dragged a quart of milk 3,000ft up El Capitan in Yosemite to tell this LEDGE AND DAIRY joke to my pun loving climbing partner

https://i.imgur.com/vClqWea.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gtluke
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I met the guy that invented the window sill.

Man, what a ledge.

πŸ‘︎ 228
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jedi_Llama154
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2018
🚨︎ report
If someone commits suicide by jumping off a building

did they kill themselves a-ledge-dly?

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Roktyv
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a cow walking on a cliff?

Ledge-n-dairy.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PrimalBarbarian
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
🚨︎ report
I got a mate who loves sitting outside Windows...

What a ledge!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BlueKnight273
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
🚨︎ report
A compass, a cough drop, and a match.

As a Boy Scout, we would camp a lot and go on hikes.

One night, we had to do a night hike, alone, for a merit badge. I had left the campsite about an hour earlier and a terrible storm rolled in. The sky opened up and the ground was quickly saturated. I tried to continue my hike for another few minutes, but it got cold and I was chilled and soaked to the bone, so I decided to try to head back to camp.

Lightning was starting to crackle above me, so I thought I should try to take a shortcut to make my hike back quicker. I pulled out my compass and found my direction, but the rain made it impossible to see more than five feet in front of me.

I was looking down at my compass, not paying any attention to where I was going, and suddenly felt weightless. The feeling didn't last long as I thumped down on slippery earth a second later.

I had fallen onto a ledge on the side of a rather steep cliff, the bottom of which was at least fifty feet down.

I sat there, contemplating on how to get back up this cliff as water rolled over the edge ten feet above me. There was nothing to grab onto to pull myself up. I was stuck there.

After a few minutes, I noticed the little ledge I was standing on was slowly getting smaller. The water was coming down so hard it was eroding the tiny bit of safety I had.

I dug through my pockets, thinking maybe I had something, anything, to help me out of my precarious situation. All I had was my compass, a cough drop, and a match. I was screwed.

So, I sat there, watching the edge of the ledge I was on get closer and closer to my feet, when suddenly I felt something pushing on my back.

I turned slightly and saw a wooden box sticking out of the cliff behind me. It was working its way out of the side, the rain surely helping it along. I tried to move away from it, but the ledge wasn't very wide and the box kept coming out, pushing me farther to the weak and failing edge.

As more of the box came out, to my horror, I realized it was a coffin! I had no idea how old it was, but it looked rather rotten. All I could think of was being pushed off this ledge, and the rotten coffin breaking and dropping a skeleton onto my broken and battered body at the bottom.

The coffin crept closer, my foot began to slip. I grabbed onto a root that was sticking out of the cliffside and dug in my pocket once more.

I hurriedly tore the wrapper off the cough drop and stuck it in my mouth. It stopped the coffin.

This joke has been told to me

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 48
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TipCleMurican
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2014
🚨︎ report
My Dad just walked into my room and said this. I'm still groaning.

He brought me an apple he cut up and put on a plate. I said thanks and reached for it... and he instead put it on this weird ledge that sticks out next to my door.

"Hey, have a snack....

...it's on the house."

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OldTimeyBurglar
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2015
🚨︎ report
Finally Had My Moment

My husband was walking around the house picking things up while I watched the kids. He stopped by a ledge in our living room and said, "Why is your cup on the edge?" I said, "I don't know, I guess it's had a long day." He walked away rolling his eyes and said, "That was the worst. You'll never top that."

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MustacheBus
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2016
🚨︎ report
I met the guy who invented window sills...

What a ledge!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2019
🚨︎ report
I met a window sill for a drink yesterday.

What a ledge.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/insideout97
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I met the guy who invented windowsills the other day

What a ledge

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jwebbs7
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.