I'll never forget when my dad told me, "Find yourself a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you!” A little taken aback, I asked him what he meant. He explained...
“She knows how to make bad decisions and stick by them!"
It's easy to convince ladies not to eat Tide Pods
But its harder to deter gents
My wife was just trying to convince me to spend $1k on a new king size bed...
...I told her I’d have to sleep on it.
My son tried to convince me that Jim Morrison was just an overrated drunk, so I angrily sent him to his room...
Nobody slams the Doors in my house!!
My friend tried to convince me to invest in his sword making business.
He made some excellent points.
how do you convince meat juice out of a bovine?
I’m trying to convince my wife that I want a Segway for my birthday.
But every time I bring it up, she changes the topic.
I don’t know why I couldn’t convince my wife she would like the set of knives I made her for Mother’s Day.
I made several good points.
My friends tried to convince me I was a chemical element with the atomic number 82....
...Thankfully, I'm not so easily lead
When you convince a Jew to convert to Hinduism.
My wife is trying to convince me that soup is better with flavour cubes.
I don’t put a lot of stock in that.
I've been trying to convince my girlfriend to get into to lumberjack cosplay
I haven't convinced her yet but I feel like it could really spruce things up
My wife and I were arguing on an airplane. She was trying to convince me to join the mile high club...
I told her,
"I'm sorry, but I don't give a flying fuck."
I'm going to start a movement that convinces people that vacuum cleaners cause autism in children.
It will be called the Anti-vacs Movement
How did Fah Mulan convince everyone she was a man?
She pretended to be Fah Ping.
I have been trying to convince people on a military history subreddit that I’m French.
I thought I managed to convince my wife that Feng Shui was not for us.
But when I got home, the tables were turned.
How did Fa Mulan convince the soldiers of the Chinese army that she's a man?
She pretended to be Fa Ping.
How do you convince a cyclist to head back home?
My wife kept trying to convince me we go on a vacation to Thailand
In the end I said Phuket.
I’m trying to convince my kids to learn Chinese
I keep telling them that it’s a radical language
I tried to convince my wife that men should always make the coffee, and that this was an edict from God.
"There's a whole section on it," I said.
"Oh yeah?"
"...Hebrews."
My friends keep trying to convince me to steal from the IHOP where I work
But I'm not a big whisk taker
My new neighbor tried to convince me he was originally from Northern Canada...
But I was having Nunavut.
I tried to convince my friend to sing a song with me.
You can convince my son of anything
How did the sperm convince the egg to accept him?
I was trying to convince my Dad to let me have a LAN Party while they're gone.
Me: There would be at the most 16 of us.
Dad: 16! For your first party?
Me: I mean Dad, its a LAN party and nothing stupid would be going on.
Dad: I don't care if it's a Land party or a Sea Party!
He then started laughing and I walked away.
After trying to convince my dad that it's important for me to fix my piano so that I remain cultured...
"You will be fine, just eat some yogurt"
I was trying to convince my SO to wear her glasses.
Her: Meh, I don't know. We'll see.
Me: Not with out your glasses, you won't!
I can't convince him to reddit but he definitely belongs here
Me: Hey, do you need me to pick up anything from the store?
Dad: Yeah, but then bring it to the register, pay, and bring it home.
My dad always told me, “Find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you.”
She knows how to make a bad decision and still stick with it.
My friend is trying to convince me to invest in his sword making business.
He makes some very good points.
My friend is trying to convince me to invest in his sword making business.
He makes some really good points.
My dad always said, “ Find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you.”
“She knows how to make bad decisions and stick by them.”
My friend is trying to convince me to invest in his sword making business.
He makes some very good points.
My friend is trying to convince me to invest in his sword making business .
He makes some excellent points.
My dad always told me to find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo, and try to convince her to marry me.
They know how to make a bad decision, and then stick to it.
My dad always said, “Find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you.”
“She knows how to make bad decisions and stick by them.”
My friend is trying to convince me to invest in his sword business I don’t want too..
But, he makes some really good points
My dad always said “Find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you”
“She knows how to make bad decisions and stick by them”
I spent all day yesterday trying to convince people on a WW2 subreddit that I was French.
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