I would cheat the Golden Globes. Hell, I would even manipulate the Academy Awards. But I would NEVER
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nyjets4life6
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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I tried to cheat during my jog by taking a shortcut through some bushes, but I didn’t realize it was poison ivy...

That was a rash decision.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
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A lion will not cheat on his wife,

But a Tiger Wood!

πŸ‘︎ 393
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ashthewarrior7
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2018
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What's a cat called when it cheats on it's mate?

A cheetah.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ“…︎ May 30 2019
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What is it called when a statistician cheats on his SO?

Fail to reject Ho

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shotaro-Hidari
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
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What's a cannibal's favourite cheat meal?

Donor kebab.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JamalalAtete
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2019
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A man cheats on his girlfriend Lorraine with a girl name Clearly. Lorraine suddenly dies.

At the funeral the man sings 'I can see Clearly now that Lorraine is gone'.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brock_a_boo22
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2019
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What do you call it when a duck cheats?

Fowl play

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Future_Tyrant
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
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Where do guys usually go to cheat?

A fair.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
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Which bird cheats on thier spouse.

CUCKoo

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fcukmylyfe
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
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Don't cheat on your partner with coffee beans

They could be used as grounds for divorce

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/souffle-etc
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2018
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Bowling cheat strikes again!
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
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Science teacher: No one cheat on this test...

I got my Ion you

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arch3typ3_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2019
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What type of pasta cheats to win an award for its Broadway musical?

Rigatoni

πŸ‘︎ 61
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clifwith1f
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2017
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How do Tusken Raiders cheat on their taxes?

They always single file, to hide their numbers.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tomdelfino
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2017
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Dad: Son, never cheat at a limbo contest...

...that's the lowest thing you can do.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/amuzmint
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2017
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Where do pharmacists go to cheat on their spouses?

Ashley Medicine

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ultra-saurus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2016
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Cheat sheet for Dads on Halloween

What is a Vampire favorite fruit?

  • Neckterines

What kind of dogs do Vampires like best?

  • Blood hounds

How does a ghost cry?

  • Boo Hoo

What does a skeleton always say before he eats?

  • Bone Appetite

What kind of key should you always take to a haunted house?

  • Skeleton Key

Why do Vampires need mouthwash?

  • Because they have bat breath

What kinds of street do Zombies like?

  • Dead ends.

What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?

  • Frost Bite

What did the black cat call the mouse on roller skates?

  • Meals on wheels

What does a vampire never at a restaurant?

  • A stake sandwich

What is it like to be kissed by a vampire?

  • It's a pain in the neck.

Why did the witch stand in front of the podium?

  • To give a Screech

What does a ghosts have for dessert?

  • I-Scream

What is a skeletons favorite instrument?

  • A trombone

What kind of dog does a mad scientist have?

  • A Lab

Be honest, how many did you get? What is your dad score?

EDIT: can't get spoiler tags to work...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gnolaum
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2014
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A lion never cheats on their wife

But a Tiger Wood.

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JascosRS
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2018
🚨︎ report
A man cheats on his girlfriend Lorraine with a woman named Clearly.

Lorraine dies suddenly. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, "I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sizzleshawty
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2017
🚨︎ report

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