Why donβt crabs and lobsters donate to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
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︎ Apr 07 2021
Gatorade should run some kind of charity promotion where they raise funds to help preserve endangered species of alligator.
π︎ 5
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︎ Feb 23 2021
I won $6million in the lottery and have decided to donate a quarter of it to charity....
I now have $5.999,999,75c left.
π︎ 18
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︎ Feb 26 2021
why don't oysters give to charity?
because they're shellfish
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︎ Feb 04 2021
What was the mental health hospital's primary charity program?
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︎ Feb 02 2021
I won a $1million in the lottery last night and have decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.
I now have 999.999.75 left.
π︎ 8
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︎ Jan 19 2021
I just received a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my old clothes to the starving people around the world...
I told them, "Anyone who fits into my clothes, certainly isn't starving. "
π︎ 3
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︎ Dec 17 2020
I donated almost 50.000$ to a charity for mute children
They didnβt even say βThank youβ
π︎ 3
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︎ Nov 28 2020
Every day I give a few cents to charity.
I like making small change.
π︎ 12
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︎ Nov 06 2020
Walking through East London, I asked my friend: βWhy is there a bull in that charity shop?β
He replied, βThatβs an Ox, famβ
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︎ Sep 27 2020
I built a business where all proceeds went to Charity.
But I ended up in jail because apparently not telling them my daughterβs name is Charity was a big no no.
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︎ Sep 06 2020
Since quarantine started, Iβve decided to dedicate myself to giving to Charity.
Iβm pretty sure thatβs not her real name but she sure does like those dollar bills.
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︎ Sep 04 2020
I'm planning a charity event for people who can't ejaculate.
Just let me know if you can't come.
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︎ Jun 05 2020
What kind of lemon performs charity work?
π︎ 6
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︎ Jul 25 2020
Do you guys know about that dumb "Sore Us" marathon for charity?
You're supposed to run until you can't anymore or something like that...? I was thinking of trying one out but honestly I don't know how good I'd do I'm an awful runner...
My friend Tyrell tried one last year and said it was the hardest thing he'd ever done...
I still can't believe Tyrannosaurus
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︎ May 11 2020
If I had $1,000,000, Iβd donate a quarter of it to charity.
Then Iβd have $999,999.75.
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Jul 06 2018
There has been some good news today as a plus-size clairvoyant announces they are releasing a charity calendar, with pictures of them in their underwear.
Fans of the psychic say that they are looking forward to seeing a large medium in smalls.
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︎ Jun 08 2020
I won a million dollars playing the lottery and donated a quarter of it to my favorite charity.
What should I do with the remaining $999,999.75?
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︎ Oct 22 2019
Why did the groundhog donate so much to charity?
π︎ 6
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︎ Feb 02 2020
A charity that looks after dogs...
π︎ 4
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︎ Jan 24 2020
I donated chairs to a charity.
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︎ Apr 26 2019
Why doesnβt the lobster give to charity?
π︎ 6
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︎ Nov 05 2019
At an auction at a Tourette's syndrome charity, I won a bid for an origami sculpture of scissors made by Dwayne Johnson. To emphasize the charity's cause, he replaced a bad word with a family-friendly word on his origami scissors.
The Rock's paper scissors said "Shoot."
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︎ Jul 17 2019
I am starting a charity to teach short people maths.
Itβs called making the little things count.
π︎ 54
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︎ Jan 24 2019
I just donated 1000$ to a blind children charity
not like the children are going to see any of it
π︎ 7
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︎ Oct 15 2019
What do you call donating to a trans charity?
A trans-action!
If you want to this is a link to a trans health hotline
https://www.translifeline.org/
π︎ 5
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︎ Oct 07 2019
Can I claim my Indian Bread company as a charity tax deduction?
Itβs a Naan Profit Organization.
π︎ 51
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︎ Jan 02 2019
Iβm working for a charity that provides support for elderly grapes
My job is in raisin awareness.
π︎ 9
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︎ Jul 09 2019
I won a unique item at the Celebrity Origami charity auction.
The auction's goal was to raise money for Tourette syndrome research by selling origami figures made by famous celebrities. To highlight the purpose of the auction, the organization in charge asked all participating celebs to write a replacement of a naughty four-letter word most closely associated with the disorder.
For example, George Clooney's origami penguin said Fudge instead of the F-word.
Margot Robbie's paper flower said Beach instead of the B-word.
I bid on the origami made by Dwayne Johnson.
The Rock's paper scissors said Shoot.
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︎ Jan 15 2019
Why donβt crabs give to charity?
Because they are shellfish
π︎ 62
π
︎ Jan 12 2021
Why donβt crabs give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish
π︎ 18
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︎ Dec 13 2020
Why donβt crabs give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Sep 30 2020
Why don't oysters give to charity?
Because they're shellfish.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Aug 17 2020
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Jul 06 2020
Why don't oysters donate to charity?
Because they're shellfish
π︎ 6
π
︎ Apr 18 2020
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 12 2019
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 02 2019
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 14 2019
Why donβt crabs donate to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish
π︎ 51
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︎ Feb 03 2019
Why don't crabs give to charity?
Because they're shellfish.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Jul 30 2016
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 16 2019
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 15 2019
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because theyβre shellfish.
π︎ 3
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︎ Oct 25 2019
I'm starting a charity to teach short people maths.
It's all about making the little things count.
π︎ 24
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︎ Jan 25 2019
Why don't crabs give to charity?
Because they're shellfish.
π︎ 15
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︎ May 23 2019
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