43 Hilarious CO Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

Ima start spelling weed oui’d cos I can’t say no to it

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👤︎ u/shpam-

📅︎ Feb 21 2021

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Just had my first day on the job as a co-pilot of the Millenium falcon...

It went well but I made some Wookiee mistakes.

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👤︎ u/cozykush44

📅︎ Apr 11 2021

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What did sine and cos say to each other?

Nothing. They just waved.

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👤︎ u/rhshi14

📅︎ Feb 17 2021

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We know the Panama has had its problems, and the Suez had that ship stuck recently, but my co-worker must know of another problematic waterway. Every day he yells out...

‘Far Canal. I hate this place’.

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👤︎ u/AndrewMacSydney

📅︎ Mar 29 2021

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I once got into an argument with a co-worker, who slammed the door so hard when he left, it broke the latch.

Which sucked, because I thought we needed the closure...

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👤︎ u/Vin135mm

📅︎ Feb 24 2021

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I asked my co-worker, "Bro, you want this pamphlet?"

He said, "Brochure."

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👤︎ u/chihiro_yoru

📅︎ Jan 21 2021

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My co-workers and I would suffer from wrist pain when we would drive through a mountain on our way to work together

We were diagnosed with carpool tunnel syndrome

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👤︎ u/I_Only_Have_One_Hand

📅︎ Jan 23 2021

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None of my Co-workers are left handed.

We get along all right.

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👤︎ u/ffjuice

📅︎ Jan 12 2021

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I have a co-worker who claimed for years that he hates Christmas. He finally broke down and told me he secretly loves it, he just has a reputation to maintain.

He finally came out of the Santa Claus-et.

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👤︎ u/barthm1

📅︎ Dec 12 2020

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What is the most co-dependent of all the pastas?

Cannelloni

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👤︎ u/PiousZenLufa

📅︎ Nov 30 2020

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A roofer was decapitated today while telling a dirty joke to his co-worker

I'm not sure what the joke was, but somebody should get his head out of the gutter.

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👤︎ u/kcsmurf112

📅︎ Oct 10 2020

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My son and his co-worker are janitors who moved in together.

They’re broommates who sweep together.

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👤︎ u/andersonfmly

📅︎ Nov 07 2020

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From my co worker: What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto

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👤︎ u/ghostlyGary

📅︎ Nov 10 2020

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I tried to convince one of my co workers to buy the first round of drinks after our shift...

He said no, but it was worth a shot.

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👤︎ u/KingmanEXE

📅︎ Oct 23 2020

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I imagine when Microsoft's co-founder Mr.Gates gets a suit tailored, they must fit him perfectly.

They have to fit the Bill.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Oct 14 2020

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As my impeccably dressed co-worker has aged, incontinence has set in.

He went from dapper Dan to diaper Dan.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Aug 07 2020

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LPT: If you don't want to buy sandwiches to your co-workers, just buy them with mistakes: Other kind of bread, other size...

Sorry, wrong sub

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👤︎ u/Potato23860

📅︎ Jul 16 2020

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My co-worker Nicholas is rarely late for work meetings, but it often shows up within 2 minutes of the meeting start time

I guess he likes to show up in the nick of time.

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👤︎ u/sarcasticpremed

📅︎ Sep 07 2020

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Soccer cos play

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👤︎ u/DueTry9

📅︎ Jun 23 2020

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Restaurant in Loveland, CO

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👤︎ u/cmahlen

📅︎ Jun 11 2020

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Gave my co-worker a can and asked him to open it. After he opened it I said that he was a can opener.

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👤︎ u/ATMiceli

📅︎ Jun 22 2020

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Co-worker got a new drill and another co-worker responded, "Oh man, he's got a gun!"

The followed response, "Guys calm down, it's just a drill."

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👤︎ u/LilPeabnut

📅︎ Dec 05 2019

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At the company picnic, my co-worker said he had some juicy gossip. He loaded up his plate but tripped on the way to my table...

He spilled the beans!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Aug 03 2020

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A pregnant co-worker walked into the office the other day. I took a look at her baby bump and said “it’s becoming apparent that you’re becoming a parent”.

Stay safe everyone and try to keep smiling

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👤︎ u/Ascott1963

📅︎ Mar 26 2020

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What starts with a CO ends with a CK and hurts when you don’t expect it?

A comeback

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👤︎ u/ennogera

📅︎ Apr 01 2020

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Last year I made a video with my co workers.

I made Covid 19

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👤︎ u/Imasterbaitwthp_ness

📅︎ May 30 2020

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Did you hear about the group of hulk cos-players at comic con?

They held a challenge to see how could get angrier then them.

It was out-rage-us!

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👤︎ u/Jinko387

📅︎ May 02 2020

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My co workers are like my Christmas lights...

Half of them don’t work and the other half aren’t that bright.

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👤︎ u/g00secs

📅︎ Nov 29 2017

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My co-worker told me The Weekend is coming to Vancouver this year.

I told her the weekend comes to Vancouver every 5 days.

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👤︎ u/zedubya

📅︎ Feb 27 2020

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Being a co-driver can really get tiresome

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👤︎ u/OuterMe

📅︎ Jul 21 2019

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I teach elementary special Ed, and my co-teacher and I joke back and forth all day. This is our most recent best.

Co-teacher: "Students name" came in and said he lost his throat.

Me: Oh no! Did he check where he last remembered having it?

Co-teacher: He couldn't say.

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👤︎ u/penigmatic

📅︎ Dec 23 2019

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My co-worker asked me if I like Eminem...

I said "no, I'm more of a Skittles guy."

"No I'm talking about the rapper."

"Why would I want to eat the wrapper?" I asked.

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👤︎ u/333iamhalfevil

📅︎ Sep 11 2019

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I need help! I am co-captain of a team to raise money for cancer. My team needs a name. I need to mix some element of cancer with Alice in Wonderland. I need a pun, and I figured this subreddit is the best place to go. Thanks

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👤︎ u/ethanfp

📅︎ Apr 26 2018

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COS thats a pun

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👤︎ u/BlackRelish12

📅︎ Nov 06 2018

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My wrists hurt whenever I drive to work with my co-workers and we go through a tunnel.

I think it's carpool tunnel syndrome.

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👤︎ u/kickypie

📅︎ Oct 18 2019

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Golden Shower Bath and Kitchen Co.

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👤︎ u/wattayagonnado

📅︎ Jun 07 2019

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Cos why not?

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👤︎ u/CriticalGeode

📅︎ May 23 2019

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Co-worker makes these, thought you guys would enjoy them

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👤︎ u/MrMurse

📅︎ Nov 15 2018

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Seen in Loveland, CO

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👤︎ u/mexican_viking13

📅︎ Apr 28 2019

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Are you a surd cos you're irrational

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👤︎ u/jusmune_

📅︎ May 26 2019

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A co-worker told be that seagulls will explode if you feed them Akka-seltzer

I told him he’s just gullible.

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👤︎ u/AndrewGlinski

📅︎ Sep 08 2019

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Got a co-worker with this one as he was heading home after a 24hr shift.

I work in the investigations section of a military police department, and aside from our normal office hours, we have 24hr shifts that cycle through the office, so that there's an investigator present and on-duty 24/7/365.

My co-worker was wrapping up some paperwork this morning, and coming off of his 24 hr shift, and almost dead to the world. At the time, a pair of other investigators in my office were discussing some case that had happened a day or two prior that involved an emancipated juvenile.

I was just logging into my workstation to check my e-mail and I turned to my co-worker and asked, "Hey, so when a juvenile gets emancipated, and he announces it - proclaims it, if you will - what would they call that?"

He stares at me with a blank, uncomprehending expression and I continue, "An emancipation...proclamation? Maybe?"

The annoyed groans of someone who's been up for 24 hours are so satisfying.

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👤︎ u/Droidball

📅︎ Jul 08 2015

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Guys beware of sin²x +cos²x if you see it in your house

After all, it can commit IDENTITY theft

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👤︎ u/YOUmang

📅︎ Sep 20 2019

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