.....Ga Ga !!!,
πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2021
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Do you know what really sucks?

Vampires

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dannn88
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2021
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I'm going to start a bed company called nothing really mattress.

Queen size only.

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/5parky
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2021
🚨︎ report
What do computers eat?

Micro chips!

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gyrolad
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2022
🚨︎ report
I asked my wife what time my dentist appointment is.

She replied: Tooth hurty

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/robdog1537
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2021
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Don’t waste your money on store bought itch relief cream.

The best itch relief is made from scratch.

πŸ‘︎ 209
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NikkoE82
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2021
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What kind of workout does a vampire hate?

CrossFit.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spawnthink
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
That’s a moray
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/whicky1978
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2021
🚨︎ report
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that’s amore.

When an eel bites your hand, and that's not what you planned, That's a moray.

When paternity tests, lead to ratings success, that’s a Maury.

When our habits are strange, and our customs deranged, That's our mores.

When your horse munches straw, And the bales total four, That's some more hay.

When Othello's poor wife Becomes stabbed with a knife, That's a Moor, eh?

When a Japanese knight Uses his sword in a fight, That's Samurai.

When your sheep go to graze In a damp marshy place, That's a moor, eh?

When your boat comes home fine And you tie up her line, That's a moor, eh?

When you ace your last tests Like you did all the rest, That's some more "A"s!

In New Zealand you see An aborigine, That's a Maori.

Alley Oop's homeland has A space gun with pizzazz, That's a Moo Ray.

A comedian ham, With the name Amsterdam, That's a Morey.

When your chocolate graham, Is so full and so crammed, That s'more, eh.

When you've had quite enough, Of this dumb rhyming stuff, That's "No more!", eh?

But Canadians protest, underrepresented in jest, what’s one more, eh?

β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”-

(Repost of mine from over a year ago. Sorry. I remembered it while stoned and it was funny again. Credit to u/weizguy74 for the Maury line.)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ComeAbout
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2021
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What is a necrophile's favourite song?

Some body to love.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sphingen
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dog magician

A labra-kadabra- dor

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/seatheous
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
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To determine the gender of a parrot you have to stick your finger in the cage. If he bites you, he's a male...

If she bites you, she's a female.

πŸ‘︎ 81
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
🚨︎ report
I decided to sell my vacuum...

It was only collecting dust.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kameemo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a poisonous moose?

Venomoose.

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EyeballKid143923
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
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A new strain of head lice was discovered that is resistant to drugs.

The problem has left scientists scratching their heads.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2018
🚨︎ report
I am scared about going to the dentist knowing how expencive it can be

I just have to brace myself and get it over with.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Knerteren
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2015
🚨︎ report
My new dentist called me and said that he needs to make another mold of my teeth.

He made a terrible first impression.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2019
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Orthodontists are going on strike

Orthodontists are going on strike.

Brace yourselves!

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stefano9
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
🚨︎ report
The toothbrush was invented in Arkansas...

Anywhere else and it would be called a teethbrush!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FrogOWar16
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2017
🚨︎ report
The URL for Just for Laughs is hahaha.com, but it should be hahahaha.com because that's just four laughs, dot com.
πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cashtronauts
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2015
🚨︎ report

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