Bean puns, my favorite
πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
🚨︎ report
Why shouldn't you put more than 239 beans in a soup?

Because adding just one more would make it too farty. Straight from my 7 year old daughter.

Edit: Thank you so much for the awards and upvotes. I showed my daughter how many people saw and appreciated her humor and she's extatic. I know she probably didn't come up with the joke herself but this was one of the first times she really got me with a good one and I thought I'd share it with some fellow dads and others.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/oak05
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Beans on toast
πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wetlettuce42
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2021
🚨︎ report
A couple of coffee beans were having a comedy show, just between friends...

It was a light roast!

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cameForTheGum
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Why does Sherlock Holmes love Mexican restaurants?

They give him good case ideas.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Eternal_Punshine
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2021
🚨︎ report
Pint o Beans
πŸ‘︎ 52
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ReddicaPolitician
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2021
🚨︎ report
Someone offered me a bowl of beans.

I think I’ll pass.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SlickHeadSinger
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2021
🚨︎ report
Lightening never strikes coffee beans

Unless they are ground

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pathrado
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2021
🚨︎ report
My buddy said he's been living on tins of baked beans all month.

That can't be good for his back.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/incredibleinkpen
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the man put his glasses in a can of beans?

To get Heinzsight.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDukeOfSpiffing
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do the Irish always put 239 beans in their soup?

Because anymore would be too farty.

Happy St. Paddy's Day!

πŸ‘︎ 79
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hallsguide
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2021
🚨︎ report
I made this She's got of lumps and bumps but I'm overall happy she's finnished kings, queens, and non-binary beans I present to you, my Les-bee-ian πŸ˜‚πŸβ€οΈπŸ§‘πŸ€πŸ’—
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xxCandy_floofxx
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
🚨︎ report
How did the father coffee bean punish his son when he did something wrong?

By grounding him

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LesionIsMyDaddy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
🚨︎ report
Jack: How’s it going? Beans: Pretty good

Jack and the beans talk

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jnr_jinx
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What happened to the Baked Beans that went around Australia?

They ended up in Cairns!

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
🚨︎ report
This morning I had fried eggs, fried bread, fried potatoes and refried beans....

Happy Fry-day.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
🚨︎ report
[OC] Intimidation.
πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rotsen3427
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2021
🚨︎ report
They're finally spilling the beans
πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/liamo000
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
🚨︎ report
If the process of decaffeinating coffee beans means being doused in formaldehyde...

Does that make them Coffinated?

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/beardwithablog
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
Keep it safe from him.
πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tway_UX
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
🚨︎ report
I killed an entire container of garbanzo bean spread.

It was hummuside.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
🚨︎ report
I just got fired, and as severance, my company gave me a bag of used coffee.

They said it was grounds for termination.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jvlpdillon
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
🚨︎ report
its all beans????
πŸ‘︎ 598
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the difference of a dog and a can of baked beans?

Well you see, the resemblance is un-canny.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Backthrasher
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
🚨︎ report
What's the best tool for grinding beans for iced coffee?

A brrrrr grinder

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/copy_run_start
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Mr. Bean said it best

when he said...

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/teeim
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Hmm
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AM10_
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
🚨︎ report
Okay guys. Who spilled the bean?
πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DutchHeIs
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Why was the bean upset with his partner's gift to him?

She gave him her peas.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kevographic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
🚨︎ report
2 female beans are in love.

Lesbeans.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/niiigggaaa
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
My son came up with this gem just now during his birthday dinner:

What kind of beans do you find in a measuring cup?
Pint-o beans!

πŸ‘︎ 146
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SleepHurts
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2021
🚨︎ report
Always has bean.
πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Asif366
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Wait, its all beans?
πŸ‘︎ 211
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/funky555
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
🚨︎ report
I just spilt baked beans everywhere.

In Heinz-sight, that was a bad idea

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Salt_E_Plum
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of beans do cannibals eat?

Human beans.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rpdaca
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the Irishman make beans with 239 beans?

Cause 1 more would be 240 (read in an Irish accent, sounds like too farty)

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/frijolita_bonita
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
β€œThere’s Bean an Accident” β€” Tee Shirt I Designed
πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/magicswitchboard
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Cops should feed beans on very tiny plates to the suspects they're interrogating.

That way they're always gonna end up spilling the beans.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cryingcactuso
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does my son grow like a bean?

Because he edamame.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SirFrankPork
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Black Beans Matter
πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/David_Jonathan0
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
How many beans do you need to make the perfect bean soup?

239.

Because one more would be too farty.

πŸ‘︎ 188
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Crash_86
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a friend named Jack who can talk to vegetables

Jack and the beans talk!!!

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pathrado
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
🚨︎ report
My friend Jack claims he can communicate with vegetables.

Jack and the beans talk!

πŸ‘︎ 652
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2021
🚨︎ report
2 puns were hidden from this page. Show all.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.