An American wants to enter a nightclub

Together with some friends from abroad, an Afghan, an Albanian, and Algerian, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguan, an Argintine, an Armenian, and Austrailian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Taiwanese, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turkish, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/leemhuis
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
🚨︎ report
Imagine Americans switched from Pound to Kilograms overnight

There would be mass confusion

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anukrit_Subedi
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2021
🚨︎ report
An American, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German where all attending a Zoom meeting. The Supervisor asked β€œcan you see me ok?”

To which they answered β€œyes” β€œoui” β€œsi” β€œja”.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you also know Michael Jackson was part Native American?

He was a quarter Cherok-HEE-HEE!

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PhoenixAurum
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2021
🚨︎ report
what do you call an american bee?

a usb

πŸ‘︎ 626
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chickenman2359
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do Americans think cow tipping is hard.

It is difficult to calculate 20% in Imperial System

>!This is a play on the word "tipping", which means....(A)Pushing a cow over.............(B)Tipping a generous amount of 20% after dinner!<

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Esmeralda_i
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
🚨︎ report
How many South Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A Brazilian!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Ancient South American owls always worked together secretly.

They were Inca hoots.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kartenhouse
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2021
🚨︎ report
The native american legends has a mythical creature similar to the unicorns of Europe.

The Unimaize.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pnaeacks
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife asked for a divorce today, saying I was too un-American.

I saw it coming from a kilometer away.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Did the Native Americans hunt bear?

No, they hunted with clothes on.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wimpykidfan37
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
What American President had the highest approval rating among pirates?

F.D. Arrrrrrrr!!!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MyLatestInvention
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
🚨︎ report
american schools are some of the only places you can have first hand experiences with Quadrilaterals and quad-collaterals
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blahblorb
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2021
🚨︎ report
A very patriotic friend who I thought loved everything American just told me he preferred Eurpoean spellings

He's finally shown me his true colours.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Retrohero5
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
🚨︎ report
If you were to second guess your decision to book time at a Native American community,

That would be called a reservation reservation reservation

Credit to Brian Regan

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/3pinephrine
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between a Shepard and an American Shepard?

The American Shepard barks American.

(Grandad to my son, had him laughing out loud)

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DaHedgehog27
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2021
🚨︎ report
My American Roblox freezer died today...

0Β°F

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Emil_Jorgensen05
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
🚨︎ report
An anthropologist was cataloging south american folk remedies with the assistance a local tribal elder who indicated the leaves of a particular fern were the best cure for constipation. The anthropologist had doubts.

But the elder insisted "with fronds like these, you don't need enemas."

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s the difference between a computer and an American?

The American doesn’t have any troubleshooting

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blueslidepark94
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
🚨︎ report
Despite waging war in Afghanistan, most Americans can't name its capital.

It's kinda hard.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tamer_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
🚨︎ report
an American IT specialist was beaten even though he had a gun with him

He had troubleshooting

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GSterian
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2021
🚨︎ report
This is what being American is all about. Second Amendment Lights.
πŸ‘︎ 107
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDorkKnight53
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
Who goes on adventures with Lara Croft but is also pretty good at American Football?

Tomb Raidy

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stgm_at
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
Camomile is a drink for Americans

Camokilometer is the preferred choice in England

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tawdry-eloquence
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the American pass out in a Canadian bar?

He saw an ad that read "Drink Canada Dry", so he thought he would give it a try.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/elster000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2021
🚨︎ report
An American man went to Germany for a vacation.

As he arrived, he decided to go fishing, so he did. But tragedy struck and his boat hit a rock, making a hole. The man, as anyone would do, called the coast guard and yelled "IM SINKING IM SINKING!"

the German Coast Guard casually replied, "what are you sinking about?"

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pidgeon-eater-69
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
🚨︎ report
As an American, it's disappointing that so few people wear vests

Especially since our founding fathers made it a point to guarantee us the right to bare arms

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/confibulator
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
An American is working out

β€œThis workout is intense!” He huffs to his friend. β€œMy heart is pounding!”

β€œHuh?” Says the friend.

β€œOh, sorry, I forgot you’re European. My heart is β€˜kilogramming’.” He replies.

πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheCVisNih
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call second thoughts about plans to visit a Native American sanctuary?

A reservation reservation reservation

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xtilexx
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2021
🚨︎ report
The Cuban main violinist's string snapped during a performance. Luckily, he got offered another violin by his American friend.

That day, another Fiddle Catastrophe was prevented.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_CockLord
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
🚨︎ report
American geologists found the largest deposits of oil.

And some unknown Arab country above it.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FullMoon-Horror
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call an American living in Russia during the winter?

Edward Snowden

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Peachho
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
🚨︎ report
What is something witches can say about themselves that most americans can not?

"I drive a stick"

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Darksides
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
Due to freezing conditions in New York, the mens American Naturist Society....

.....has seen the size of their members shrink dramatically.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Why was the Native American bartender fired?

He kept charging $24 for a Manhattan

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hutimuti
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that Americans eat more bananas than monkeys every year?

Which makes sense, because I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.

πŸ‘︎ 98
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nadajoe
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife is kicking me out because she's fed up with my South American animal puns...

'OK,' I said, 'Alpaca my bags.'

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Why won’t Americans switch from pounds to kilos?

It would cause mass confusion

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fuckleberyfinn
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call an american car that crashed into a body of water?

A Fjord fusion!

I'll see my way out

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Skorge963
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
🚨︎ report
We Tried Getting Americans to Start Measuring Weight in Kilograms Instead of Pounds

But they were very cagey about it.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/adhoc42
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight

There would be mass confusion.

πŸ‘︎ 90
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SlovenianGregor
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight

There would be mass confusion

πŸ‘︎ 233
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Alluxin_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report

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