I found myself bereft at the chaos that run through the winding streets of China town. The horror

The wonton destruction.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TommyW-Unofficial
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I delight in winding up my 12 year old daughter

She utterly hates Dad jokes. This, naturally, only encourages me

So, yesterday

Me: Hey Princess! Did you hear they found some crazy insect on the moon?

Her: This is a dad joke isn't it? Please get out of my room

Me: No really. They're calling it a lunar-tic

Her: OUT!

πŸ‘︎ 131
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ginolard
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2015
🚨︎ report
What color is the wind?

Blew!

πŸ‘︎ 501
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lodiman77
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2021
🚨︎ report
So two wind turbines are standing in a field when one asks the other β€˜what kind of music do you like?’

The second replies β€˜I’m a big metal fan’

Courtesy of my 10 year old!

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/themeatspin
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2021
🚨︎ report
A man goes up to a wind turbine.

Man: Are you a fan of music

Turbine: Yeah I’m a big metal fan

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Great joke, albeit a bit long winded.

There was once a boy. He was the son of the richest man in the universe. Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, he dwarfed them all. He was a multi-trillionaire. Now, it was this boy's birthday. His father asked him,

"My son. I am the richest man in the universe. I could buy you anything you want for your birthday. A store full of lego, all the video games in the world, anything. What would you like?"

His son replied.

"Oh father. It would make me the happiest boy in the world if you could get me one pink ping pong ball."

His father was rather confused by this request. Out of all the things he could've chosen, his son chose a ping pong ball. Nonetheless, he agreed and gave him a pink ping pong ball. His son was overjoyed and spoke to him.

"My father, you have made me the happiest boy in the world. May I go up to my room and play with my pink ping pong ball?"

"Okay son, go ahead."

The boy then went up to his room and played with his pink ping pong ball. When his father went in the next morning to check on him, the boy was sleeping in his bed and the pink ping pong ball was nowhere to be found.

On the boy's next birthday, his father asked him again.

"My son. I am the richest man in the universe. I could buy you anything you want for your birthday. What would you like?"

His son replied.

"Oh father. It would make me the happiest boy in the world if you could get me one box full of pink ping pong balls."

His father was again, confused by this. Still, he bought a cardboard box and filled it with ping pong balls. He gave it to his son, who said.

"My father, you have made me the happiest boy in the world. May I go up to my room and play with my pink ping pong balls?"

The father nodded, and the son went up to his room to play. The next morning when his father went to check, the boy was sleeping peacefully and there were no pink ping pong balls in sight. Just the empty cardboard box in the middle of the room.

On the boy's next birthday, his father asked him again.

"My son. I am the richest man in the universe. I could buy you anything you want for your birthday. What would you like?"

"Oh father. It would make me the happiest boy in the world if you could get me one truck full of ping pong balls."

Now, by this point, the father was extremely confused. Why did the boy want so many pink ping pong balls and where were they going? He asked.

"My son. You are the most precious thing in the world to me and I can certainly get you this, but may I ask, why do you want

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/phrresehelp
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a teacher that would never break wind in public?

A private tutor

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
I’m currently writing a book about wind, hurricanes and tornados..

It’s only a draft at the minute.

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/justbeatitTTD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Giraffes can never apologize to each other.

It takes them too long to swallow their pride.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SerbianTarHeel
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
🚨︎ report
I made a pun about the wind.

I kinda blows

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Xenonthewizlard
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2021
🚨︎ report
What kind of music do wind turbines like? imgur.com/TJUIW3h
πŸ‘︎ 67
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KipsBay2181
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bird with trapped wind?

A canairy.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/incredibleinkpen
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
🚨︎ report
It's really hard to sail without much wind

Even though everyone says it's a breeze.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/smithsea2
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2021
🚨︎ report
I wanted to share my joke about the wind....

.....but it's only a draft.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
🚨︎ report
I hate the wind so much

It really blows

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tristpa2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2021
🚨︎ report
I asked the Doctor β€˜have you got anything for excessive wind?’

He gave me a kite

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DrunkOnOrange
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
🚨︎ report
I was replaying Wind Waker recently after having binged BNHA, and the idea popped into my head.
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/awesomecat42
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I don't seem to have the enthusiasm to break wind like I used to

In fact, the last few were very half-farted

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xAnxietyPrimex
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2021
🚨︎ report
I don’t know what I did to the wind to piss it off

It always seems to be against me lately

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm starting to write a book about a tornado disaster

It's just a draft at the moment.

πŸ‘︎ 296
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MyCatsAreDumb
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call iron in the wind?

Febreeze.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/menscheese
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Thought process for this one was particularly long winded
πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jrum7000
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Ever heard of wind energy?

I'm a big fan

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dupini97
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend said the the wind was really cold and painful...

I said "hey wind, chill..."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/trapdagangz
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I thought my friends believed I was the clock

But it ends up they were just winding me up.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ricerly
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
🚨︎ report
How did the wind mill introduce itself to the farmer?

Hi, I am a big fan.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lead_the_leader
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
BREAKING NEWS!

Amazon lobsters in Maine attempt to unionize, but wind up in hot water. In an interview, Jeff Bezos simply stated, β€œPass the butter.”

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CitizenSnipz777
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
🚨︎ report
I asked a wind turbine whether it liked "Blowin' in the Wind"

"Of course," it said, "I'm a big fan!"

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BidetTheorist
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2020
🚨︎ report
My favorite summertime allergy song is Blowin' in the Wind...

by Peter Pollen Mary.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
How did the gingerbread man wind up with one leg?

He lost the other in Nom.

πŸ‘︎ 372
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MelkorHimself
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Wind

Nature’s biggest fan

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thechiefheath
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2020
🚨︎ report
What color is the wind?

Blew

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/p_tally
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Two wind turbines are standing in a wind farm..one turns to the other and says β€œwhat’s your favorite kind of music?”

He replied β€œI’m a big metal fan!”

πŸ‘︎ 98
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/maniamadd
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
🚨︎ report
these two wind turbines were standing in the field talking. one says to the other, "what kind of music do you like?" the reply...

"I'm a big metal fan"

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/niftyww
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2021
🚨︎ report
What colour is the wind

Blew

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/joeytherealking
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2021
🚨︎ report
What color is the wind??

Blew!

πŸ‘︎ 15k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ab1113
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the colour of wind?

Blew.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Two wind turbines are standing in a field and one asks the other β€˜what kind of music do you like?’

The other replies β€˜Well, I’m a big metal fan.’

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KBilly4-21
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
What's the color of the wind?

Blew

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chihiro_yoru
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Two wind turbines stood in a field one wind turbine asks the other wind turbine "What type of music do you like?" The other wind turbine replies..

"I'm a huge metal fan"

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the color of the wind?

Blew.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/el-duce
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
One wind turbine asks the other one β€œwhat kind of music do you like?”

The other one says β€œI’m a heavy metal fan.”

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lunarwizard24
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What color is the wind?

Blew

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sillusober
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
🚨︎ report
What color is the wind?

Blew.

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lil-_-nuggs
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What color is the wind?

Blew

πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Oakenshield-
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I went up to a wind turbine. I asked it if it enjoyed music.

It said yeah. I’m a big metal fan.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
🚨︎ report

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