I wrote down the names of all the people I hate on a piece of paper, but my roommate used it roll up a joint.
Now heβs high on the list of people I never want to talk to again.
π︎ 20k
π
︎ Dec 03 2020
I had a happy childhood. My dad used to put me in tires and roll me down hills
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︎ Jan 09 2021
When I was first learning Photoshop I got a bit creative. I could hear my friends roll their eyes.
π︎ 6
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︎ Jan 26 2021
I still remember my childhood quite fondly, when dad used to roll us down the hill inside car tires.
Those were the Good Years.
π︎ 46
π
︎ Jan 02 2021
I bought a roll on deodorant, the instructions said "remove cap and push up bottom"...
I walk kinda funny now but my farts smell great!
π︎ 42
π
︎ Jan 02 2021
Why Did The Toilet Paper Roll Down The Hill?
π︎ 21
π
︎ Jan 19 2021
My friend wasn't happy with his new car, so I said "Dude, just roll with it".
π︎ 4
π
︎ Dec 22 2020
I made a meme on r/golf. It slow rolls a dadjoke. Please enjoy.
Link to post
Please know the scorecard isn't mine. I shamelessly stole that from google search.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 07 2021
The first company to rename their dinner rolls "gravy mops" is really going to clean up.
π︎ 2
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︎ Dec 26 2020
So I went to my local astrology group and was asked to take roll call. And wouldnβt you know it?
All the signs were there.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 08 2021
How do you make a sausage roll
π︎ 19
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
π︎ 91
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︎ Oct 13 2020
Eye roll upto the brain
π︎ 195
π
︎ Oct 03 2020
What language do impersonators of the King of Rock n' Roll sing in?
π︎ 8
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︎ Nov 22 2020
Do any of you have experience making Moroccan Rolls?
I found a recipe in a magazine but I wasn't sure about it because the recipe calls for thyme and a bunch of other spices. I had them all, but unfortunately they were all expired. I decided to make them anyways, took them to a party, and they ended up all being eaten, everyone thought they were delicious.
I guess what they say is true.
People love that old thyme Moroccan roll.
π︎ 17
π
︎ Dec 02 2020
Whatβs the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?
π︎ 654
π
︎ Sep 05 2020
Synonym rolls...
Just like grammar used to make.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Nov 30 2020
Purr Riff A Roll
π︎ 128
π
︎ Aug 29 2020
Did you hear about the guy shooting paper towel rolls in the wild?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 09 2020
yes , synonym rolls
π︎ 80
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︎ Aug 21 2020
The other day I saw a large number of bread rolls moving rhythmically to music.
They were doing it in a-bun-dance.
π︎ 22
π
︎ Oct 31 2020
Someone: "If you need 144 rolls of toilet paper for a 14 day quarantine you probably should've been seeing a doctor long before COVID-19"
My response: "144? That's a gross"
π︎ 14k
π
︎ Mar 16 2020
I donβt often roll joints...
But when I do itβs usually my ankle
π︎ 12
π
︎ Sep 15 2020
I had a great childhood, I remember my dad would put me in a tire & roll me down the hill all summer.
π︎ 85
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︎ May 31 2020
I was reminded of the timeβs when I was a child the other day. My dad is to stick us in tires and roll us down the hills in the back yard....
Those were the GOODYEARS.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 09 2020
I love synonym rolls.
They're just like cinnamon rolls. Only spelled different.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jul 26 2020
Why did the baker switch to dog shaped rolls?
He always wanted a purebred.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jun 22 2020
Grammar made the best synonym rolls
π︎ 56
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︎ Jun 18 2020
Synonym rolls only make your vocabulary fat!
π︎ 45
π
︎ Apr 08 2020
Some think dad jokes make just roll your eyes. But they are actually awesome. And here is why.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Aug 02 2020
I donβt always roll a joint but when I do...
π︎ 198
π
︎ Mar 20 2020
What do you call the same thing as a cinnamon roll?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 29 2020
I told my wife a dad joke and she gave me two eye rolls...
Normally, she rolls only one eye. π΅
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 07 2020
I bought a roll of over priced Velcro yesterday
π︎ 41
π
︎ Apr 15 2020
Thereβs this coin wrapper that can roll any coin: pennies, nickels, dimes etc. Just roll it up to a marked spot and voila, a perfect roll.
My favorite wrapper is the fifty cent piece
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 29 2020
When you roll in from a night out but you're tyred so you just sit down in the garden slumped against the wall
π︎ 4
π
︎ May 19 2020
I ran out of toilet roll so am reduced to wiping my butt with lettuce leaves.....
I fear it's just the tip of the iceberg.
π︎ 12
π
︎ Mar 19 2020
A really want a Vietnamese roll.
But they Bahn Mi from going outside.
π︎ 22
π
︎ Apr 29 2020
I am on a roll, I mean what are circles...
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 26 2020
You know, I had such a happy childhood. My dad used to put me in tyres and roll me down the hill.
π︎ 184
π
︎ Oct 30 2020
I remember my childhood quite fondly, when Dad used to roll us down the hill inside car tires.
Those were the Good Years.
π︎ 24
π
︎ Oct 20 2020
I never roll my eyes at people.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 09 2020
Mmm.. Synonym rolls
..The way old Grammar used to make them.
π︎ 45
π
︎ Jul 31 2020
I had a happy childhood, dad would roll me down the hill in a tire
π︎ 19
π
︎ Aug 10 2020
I wrote down the names of everyone I hate on a piece of paper, and my roommate used that to roll his joint.
Heβs now high on the list of people I never want to see again.
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Jun 04 2019
Why did the toilet roll go down the hill?
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jul 12 2020
How do you make an egg roll?
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jun 29 2020
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