Verizon Puns

It’s probably a good thing considering they’re both well-known carriers.

They cell phones.

(Uk version) Why do companies like EE and O2 ban women called Maureen’s from stores?

Because MO BUY ALL (mobile) phones.

I work in a phone shop so I may have found these funnier than I should have

Me: So why is there and iPhone 7,8, and 10, but no iPhone 9?

Him: 7 ate 9

My dad and I walk into the Verizon store because my mom's iPhone mysteriously stopped working. The clerk working at the front desk came up to us an asked us a few questions about the phone. He asked my dad, "Have you ever introduced the phone to water?" To which my dad quickly responded to with "Yes, I said, phone, this is water. Water, this is phone. " the clerk didn't get why my dad and I started laughing.

As he was logging in to the computer he said it was taking forever to catchup. He then said it must have been full of mustard. When I got done laughing he continued to explain the joke anyways.

So that they can have two "Monopoly"s

• Me: I'm picking up pizza, are you hungry?
• Dad: No, I'm Dad.
• Me: You're hilarious
• Dad: Wrong again Matthew, I'm Dad!
• I Walked right into it

Me: "What about this shopping center? Its got a Waffle House, a sushi place, a burger place and a Verizon wireless. "

Wife: "What would we get at the Verizon store? "

Me: "Not alot. They charge by the byte."

Groans were had, but I couldn't stop smiling for the rest of lunch.

Dad - So your brother is really hoping to get a job at Verizon or AT&T. Me - Really why is that? Dad - Sell Phones.