Unbuckled Puns

But everytime I go into the bathroom and take my clothes off, I turn the shower on.

Setup:

  I didn't have enough speed to get past a flat area that we reached, and we were on our last run of the day. I had to unbuckle one of my boots and pushed myself to the slope. My dad was worried that we were running late and they would send ski patrol to guide us down. (We got on the lift last minute)

  The joke:

  dad: "what are you doing?"

  me: "I was getting close to the wooded area (there was a fork) and I didn't want to run into a tree"

  dad: "well hurry up and let's skedaddle ski-daddle"

  I didn't get the joke until I was going back downhill, so he didn't hear how hard I groaned.

...to find his house with the lights dimmed down and candles surrounding the bed in the bedroom. He finds his wife there, laying abroad with sexy panties and a pink bra, and her bangs covering her left eye. She smiles. "Tonight," she says. "Is going to be the sexiest and most passionate night of your life, sweetie." The husband smiles as his wife gets up and unties his tie for him, and unbuckles his pants. He can't wait. "Lets try role playing." she says. "I'll be your slutty little daughter, and you'll be my father who needs to teach me... discipline..." He grins widely, liking where this is going. His wife grabs him and pulls him down to the bed. She whispers in his ear. "I'm so horny..." The husband enjoys this and decides to follow along with the role playing. He then whispers back in her ear. "Hi, horny. I'm dad."