Why didnt the skeleton fight the monster?
Did you ear that the shoe-eating monster suddenly passed out last night?
Apparently the shoes he ate were laced.
what monster do golfers fear the most?
Word on the street is, Cookie Monster has tested positive for COVID
It's the Om nom nom nomicron variant.
Why did the monster house like eating renters who acted strangely?
Because they were sus tenants.
I ran into the office this morning and switched the m and n keys on as many keyboards as I could. Some might call me a monster but
The rest are definitely goimg to call ne a nomster.
Villager 1: Flee for your lives! The mad scientist in the castle turned a tiny lizard into a monster that's destroying everything in its path!
Villager 2: Meh, why bother. We're doomed from the gecko.
Why did the sea monster eat most of the fleet of ships that were carrying potatoes?
No one can stop at just one potato ship.
did you hear about the giant monster made of rotting fish?
It's reeking haddock all over town
What’s the name of the cheesy monster from Stranger Things?
Hey guys, I need some more Halloween dad jokes! This one did pretty well when my kids were 3 & 5: Why did the monster go to the barber?
Because they needed a scare cut.
Why is the octopus the tickle monster’s favourite sea creature?
Because it has ten tickles.
A pastor tried to model his sermons after memes of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
After eating the ship, the sea monster said,
I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.
What does the monster put on his bagel?
Somebody asked me who my favorite monster was? I said oh that’s easy, the vampire from Sesame Street.
They told me oh he doesn’t count, but I assure you he does.
How did Cookie Monster feel after eating all the cookies?
What did the sea monster say to the comedian?
Why did the monster go to the German pub?
To get a frank and stein.
Which fabled monster is always in the know?
"Hey son, why did the sea monster eat not just one, but FIVE ships carrying a cargo of potatoes?" Grimacing, he replied, "I don't know dad, why?"
"Because who can stop at just one potato ship?!"
[DAY 61] after over two months of being chased by the scarecrow monster through the grain maze, I finally found the exit and escaped.
I barley made it out alive
I made a horror story about the macaroni monster
I guess it turned out to be a creepypasta :)
What did they serve at the Graveyard Bash where they were all doing the Monster Mash?
So my horror fanatic friend recently asked why none of the Silent Hill monster have eyes?
I told them, well I guess it's because the Hills took them all.
So in a stunning turnabout my 8 year old nailed me with a great dad joke. “What’s the worst smelling monster in mythology?”
Why couldn’t the Cookie Monster make his bed?
He couldn’t find a cookie sheet!
Who is the iconic tsundere monster?
I plugged in a nightlight to deal with the monster under the bed.
Tonight it's reading Pet Sematary.
I will find the monster who rearranged the labels on their spice rack
How can you tell if a metal singer has Cookie Monster vocals, before they go on stage? Check the tuners on their guitar...
9 times out of 10 they are Grovers.
Probably the real monster Eminem was talking about
When you leave the church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster...
That's called A-pasta-cy
I'm proud of that one. I originally posted it to r/cleanjokes
The monster took all the keys off my keyboard.
Now I'm out of control and there's no escape.
Why didn’t the monster laugh at the ghosts joke?
Because he was full of sheet.
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
What did the monster say to his son after he hadn’t seen him for years?
Two monsters were at a party having a good time when one of them noticed a lady monster rolled her eyes at them. The monster asked his monster friend "what should I do?"
The other other monster replied "be a gentleman, roll them back to her."
Did you hear about the monster-sized piece of cheese destroying the city?
What did one sea monster say to the other sea monster when they started their new jobs as sewer inspectors?
It’s going to be a Nessie job, but let’s get Kraken!
Why did the sea monster eat 5 ships loaded with potatoes?
Everybody knows you can't eat just one potato ship.
After eating the ship, the sea monster said,
I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.
Why did the sea monster eat 5 ships carrying potatoes?
Because you can't eat just one potato ship.
What did the sea monster say to the comedian?
I came into the office early and switched as many M and N keys on keyboards as I could. Some might say I'm a monster...
But others will say nomster
After eating the ship, the sea monster said,
I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.
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