20 Hilarious Talking Dog Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

I once met a talking dog, and decided to ask "what do you get from a tree's outer layer?"

But it's answer was just a bark

Edit:spelling

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👤︎ u/Nuudom

📅︎ Feb 15 2021

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I was talking to my neighbor's wife and she told me that her dog had bit her husband, so they had to put him down.

Then she asked if I could take out the trash weekly.

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👤︎ u/professorf

📅︎ Feb 19 2021

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Talking sheep dog: that's all 50 sheep!

Farmer: wait, we should only have 46!

Dog: yeah, I rounded em up

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👤︎ u/NotA_Drug_Dealer

📅︎ Sep 01 2020

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My little Sister: What's more amazing than a talking dog?

Me: What?

Her: A spelling bee

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👤︎ u/Bruinsfan011

📅︎ Aug 22 2020

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Two dogs were talking

Dog 1: Knock knock Dog 2: Woof Woof Woof

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👤︎ u/rahulkashyap0000

📅︎ Jul 22 2020

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Somebody was giving me a synopsis of their fan fic that includes a killer clown, a talking dog, and a flying house and at the end they said

"that about sums it-up"

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👤︎ u/wtflagnard

📅︎ Jun 27 2020

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I was once walking my dog along a promenade during a storm. I got chatting to a German tourist. While we were talking, my dog decided to go for a swim. It was clear he was struggling then he got dragged under. The German dived in, pulled him out and did cpr. The dog coughed then came back to life

"That's amazing" I said "how did you know to do that? Are you a vet?" "Vet?" He asked. 'of corse I'm vet. I was in zee sea"

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👤︎ u/RedDogBoyMark

📅︎ Jan 28 2020

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Got my wife twice while talking about our dog

My wife just finished eating some eggo waffles and the dog came in and immediately started licking the syrup off her hands

Her: the dog didn't even see me eat yet he ran straight over to me and began licking my hands.

Me: Yeah, it's like he nose

Her (trying to come up with something to out do my joke): That was quite the paw-n

Me: Was that supposed to be a joke, because it sounded like a faux-paw

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👤︎ u/krigito

📅︎ Dec 03 2015

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My dad was talking about our dog, who has a collar with her name written on it...

...he said she has "collar ID."

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👤︎ u/el_vetica

📅︎ Apr 07 2014

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I was talking about my dog being put down when my husband interjected with a racist dad joke...

Me: Did you know euthanasia is pink? Husband: What do you mean? Youth in Asia are yellow.

Because apparently euthanisia sounds like youth in Asia... Face palm.

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👤︎ u/KhaleesiofDothraki1

📅︎ Jun 23 2014

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Talking about the dog...

You can SPOT a Dalmatian anywhere.

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👤︎ u/tooposhtofunction

📅︎ Sep 26 2014

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What's cooler than a talking dog?

A spelling bee!

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👤︎ u/PhoenixAurum

📅︎ Mar 03 2020

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What's more impressive than a talking dog?

a spelling bee

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👤︎ u/jnnx3

📅︎ Dec 12 2017

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What’s more amazing than a talking dog?

A Spelling Bee

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👤︎ u/Twigsnapper

📅︎ Feb 17 2019

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What's more amazing than a talking dog?

A spelling bee!

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👤︎ u/Bakedschwarzenbach

📅︎ Jun 17 2019

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So I was talking to my dog and I asked how his day was.

He said ruff

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👤︎ u/SatanJoshKelpie22

📅︎ Mar 31 2019

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What’s better than a talking dog?

A spelling bee.

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👤︎ u/RageMonster17

📅︎ Dec 25 2018

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What's more impressive than a talking dog?

A spelling bee

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👤︎ u/aragon10

📅︎ Nov 04 2016

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What's more amazing than a talking dog?

A spelling bee.

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👤︎ u/SteelApple

📅︎ Mar 17 2017

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What's better than a talking dog?

A spelling bee

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👤︎ u/tbrian2287

📅︎ Dec 30 2013

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