If I told you I knew a convoluted joke about a golf club, a sheep, a stinging insect, a tree, and that scary clown movie...
Have you heard about hoverflies, the insect that mimics a stinging insect, but doesn't have a stinger?
I was going to spend Friday night studying stinging polyps that spend major part of their lifetime attached to rocks at the bottom of the sea, but a couple pals wanted me to go bar hopping...
With friends like that, who needs anemones?
In ancient Egypt if you held a stinging insect you were thought to be very attractive
Because beauty is in the eye of the beeholder
Why are stinging nettles so good?
Because they're untouchable.
I'm going to start a conservationist website focussing specifically on the joints of stinging insects.
Researchers recently unveiled a device that will lauch stinging insects at high speeds.
Me (in UK): officer, just enquiring, are you a fan of the music of Sting?
Me: the reason why I'm asking is that you are a member of the Police
Officer: please, Don't stand so close to me
My son asked me, "Daddy, why do bees stay in the hive in the winter?" I smiled and answered...
What happened when Sting retired?
He changed his name to Stung.
"Honey, who might bee at the front door?"
Where did Noah put all the bee’s in his Ark?
When Sting finally retires, do you think he’ll change his name to Stung?
Sting’s studio was broken into, thousands of dollars worth of gear stolen
Now the Police have no leads.
What do you call paramedics in a rock concert?
Sting has disappeared, The Police have no lead
A man walks into a pet store and asks for a dozen bees. The clerk carefully counts 13 bees out onto the counter. “That’s one too many!” says the customer.
The clerk replies “It’s a freebie”
My almost 3 year old just dad joked my wife
My wife told my almost three year old son that they would be making Christmas cookies with frosting. My son then said he didn’t like frosting. When my wife asked why, he said it was because the frosting would “sting” him.
Frosting. Frost-sting.
I’m so proud of him.
I have a Russian friend who is a sound technician.
And I have a Czech one too. A Czech one too.
I Don't Understand Why People Have Been Hating On The Police.
Roxanne is a really good song.
A Police officer called Roxanne told me how to social distance,
She said "don't stand, don't stand so close to me"
What do bees go to college for?
Whenever I wash my contact lenses with water it never really cleans them right and it stings when I put them in.
If only there was a solution.
I was tuning a guitar. While doing this one of the stings snapped in half perfectly. I took one half and stretched It out. I managed to get it on. One problem though. As soon as I played it shot straight to the ceiling.
I’d never heard or seen such a high note.
Everytime I wash my contacts in water it makes my eyes sting.
If only there was a solution.
Why beekeeper yelled at his son?
Because he didn't beehive properly.
Bee's that sting people are pointless
What does Sting’s doctor say when he looks at his x-rays?
“Hmm, that’s intra-sting”
Have you heard the one about the bee sting remedy made from Avocados?
..and fish oil?
They call it "AvoCodro's Number"
Got a wicked sting
The devil is in the bee tails
What is it called when bees sting each other?
Did you hear the singer Sting got kidnapped?
News just in: Local police have acquired 1000 bees
They're believed to be used as part of a sting operation
What is Sting's favourite band?
Did you hear about the time the lead singer of the band “The Police” went undercover to catch a criminal?
Did you hear about the nationwide sting operation on those who mix drinks?
Many of them are behind bars now.
What type of bee doesn't sting?
Did you guys hear, the musician Sting was kidnapped...
This one really stings
My girlfriend and I are sitting outside when she sees a bee land about a foot away.
Her: OMG KILL IT KILL IT PLEASE!!!!
Me: why? He's just minding his own bzzzness.
Sting has been kidnapped!!!
The Police don't have a lead.
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