Some next gen stats
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πŸ‘€︎ u/unarmedarmenian
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
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Police forces are deflating the stats of seized drugs during the drug war campaign.

Apparently, they didn't do the math but they did the meth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Baldomccoy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
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Spooky Stats from my online lesson today imgur.com/a/O5IJJSW
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πŸ‘€︎ u/usdsquare
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
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I made this cake for my stats teacher who got engaged. Our class is confident the marriage will be for a lifelong interval.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/neat_one
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2019
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Choking Puns, STAT!

A female friend of mine has a sexual fantasy of being choked during sex (which she exposed during a drunken... "moment"), I am a bad person and find great pleasure in exploiting this via subtle public humiliation! SO, what choking puns have we got to offer?! I'd think of my own but I go to say them and I just choke...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeow91
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2017
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We Were Using "R", the Software Environment, in my Stats Class Today

The professor asked us what a pirate's favourite letter was. We all grudgingly answered "R..." in unison. "NAY," he replied. "It's the C!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thewreckage
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2015
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My stats professor is definitely a dad...

Student: "I have a general question."

Professor: "Well I'm only a major but I will try and help!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AveryW
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2013
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My stats teacher just told this

He was grocery shopping with his 4 kids and a guy went by and said

"Daddy sure looks like his hands are full!"

And his youngest daughter, Elaina who is around 7,replied

"Actually, if you look at my dad right now, his hands are clearly empty."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Waffle_Poker
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2015
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Stats teacher is a master dadjoker

Student- S Teacher- T

S: Hey Mr. Frizzle, can I go to the bathroom?
T: What's up with you having to go the bathroom so much lately?
S: I haven't gone to the restroom in like 3 weeks!

T: Oh my god! Run! No one can last that long!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SeismicAltop
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2014
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Apparently, People are 44% less observant than ten years ago.

I read that somewhere.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2019
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What does a placebo say on Halloween?

β€œTrick or Treatment!”

(Told to me by one of my stats students. I’m incredibly proud.)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ookitarepanda
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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A study shows that 60% of studies are fake
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jimmyshouseoffun
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2019
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If Pres. Obama did another AMA, can we title it obAMA?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yemers12
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2016
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We need to change the temperature FAST

ThermoSTAT

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πŸ‘€︎ u/http-ang
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2019
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My AP Statistics Teacher is Clearly a Dad

Teacher: β€œWhat will next week’s test be on?”

Class: β€œConfidence intervals and….”

Teacher: β€œNo, it’ll be on paper.”

Class: β€œUgh…”

Teacher: β€œAnd how long will it be?”

Class: β€œUmm, like, ten questions?”

Teacher: β€œNo, 8.5 by 11 inches.”

Class: β€œGoddamnit.”

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2014
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PSA: don't forget the " took you a year to respond" joke.

Now that 2019 is around the corner, you can achieve ultimate dad stats by sending a message to your contacts near the end of 2018. Then, send "Why did you wait a year to respond ?".

This only works once a year so be prepared.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MegaDankAccount
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2018
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[Request] Fish puns.

I am at the beach with my family for Christmas and I need some high quality fish puns STAT! Thanks ahead of time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bozzy253
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2016
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I rolled a critical hit on my dad joke last night

Wife is sitting on the couch, couple friends are over to plan our upcoming D&D campaign. One friend, named Joe, is rolling stats and getting mediocre results.

I lean over, stare hard at my wife, and say, "Looks like he's just an average Joe..."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zigmata
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2017
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Abraca-dad-bra!

I wanted someone to make me a cappuccino, so I said in a Facebook post announcing, 'Someone make me a cappuccino STAT.' My dad responded with, 'O.K. - you're a cappuccino.'

Proud to be related to that man.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rodeohno
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2014
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A little bit of a mathy joke

I was in a stats course and we were doing some regression. To estimate the parameters, we need to square a bunch of differences and add them up. This is called the "Sum of Squares," so I leaned over to my friend and asked "Why not all of them?"

Fortunately my friends are needs, too.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/De-Vox
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2015
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I work at a door factory. I will be leaving employment there on Tuesday. I need them to "love me" I need puns stat!

Sorry, but all I have is, I need ADOORable puns.

Thank you guys, keep it coming!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ldr_Jag_Man
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2016
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