They know shorthand
They were taking minutes.
Hospital visitation hours are 6 PM to 7 PM.
I’m sorry but the punchline is too crude for this sub.
It was a blatant case of clock blocking.
That's only because no one has seen his dark side.
The P was silent.
Eyewitnesses say it was Priti in tents.
I'm getting sick of Yellen hollerin' at us
Because of all their business affairs
Because he was Blinken.
After all, the Republicans can't say no to A. Blinken!
The “state” is denial
If the two Secretaries of State have a stare down contest, ours is Blinken.
She wasn't McEnany sense.
She multitasks as a Rubber maid
They were just following the chicken!
It was a bad heir day!
Life in General
The therapist looks up from his paperwork, looks at the man, and says, "I'm busy at the moment, so I'll deal with you later."
She came into my office with a box of highlighters for me and as a dad, I felt compelled to say "thanks, this will be the highlight of my day"
She sighed, groaned, and left, questioning her life choice to work here. :(
Bill Clinton came two terms with the presidency.
I was trying to reach a guy with the last name Yip. When I called the front desk, I asked for him, and it went like:
Me: Mr. Yip, please
Her: Ok, Y-I-P?
Me: I don't know, why do you?
Her: ....huh?
Me: Yes, Y-I-P.
Her: Transferring...
I was amused, at least.
... that would be unpresidented.
Madeleine Albright, Albright, Albright.
I offered to help her, but she said she was fine.
It was light.
He kept taking all the minutes.
[dictated but not bread]
Before I was born my parents lived in Philadelphia. My mom was about 7 months along when they were referred by a friend of a friend to this pediatrician who was top notch. They were on their way for the first visit to the new doctors and they were running late. They walked into a crowded waiting room and went to the front glass and checked in. The secretary started yelling at my mother and father saying this is Dr. so and so, he is a top class physician, people wait years to get on his waiting list, AND YOU'RE LATE!
And my father goes "OF COURSE SHES LATE THATS HOW YOU END UP AT A PEDIATRICIAN'S OFFICE!"
Even the secretary cracked a smile as everyone else groaned and laughed.
So I was going to go home sick and they need to talk to a parent to make sure it's ok(even though I'm 18 which is dumb.) so I get my dad on the phone and here's what happened.
Secretary: "hello this is dad?"
My dad: "Hi dad this is Joe."
Me and the secretary died laughing and I had to assure her that my dad isn't usually that dumb.
Him: "It's private."
Me: "No, it's okay, you can tell me."
But one man, born with extra sensitive smelling, has been providing free exams to the public to eradicate this new threat. Dr. Theodore Nose of UCH Hospital has a long line of patients waiting every morning, wanting the incredible accuracy of this man.
And as his secretary says...
No one's nose knows noses like Nose's nose knows noses.
I'm a teacher, and due to recent storms we've had a few short-lived blackouts.
Today in class the electricity was being fixed by the company and they had to shut the lights off for a few minutes.
Secretary (comes in the room): were there any problems with the lights off?
Me (I've got this, I'm ready!): No, we were delighted.
The secretary left, paused outside and then came back in with the worst glare possible. Yes!!!
Thank you guys, I was prepared.
Edit: Front page!!! Awesome! This is the highlight of my day! Keep your puns coming, I love them all (and I'm secretly practicing them for the proper opportunity).
Thank you so much /user/x9x9x9x9x9 for the gold! It made everything that much better.
Keep your puns coming you guys (especially teachers!).
Egyptian Transport Secretary: We need a new bus
My secretary looked extra beautiful in that light and atmosphere!
The Secretary of da' Fence!
I work at a catholic hospital and they were handing out a book called "Bless You". I asked if it was a hospital guide to sneezing one secretary laughed and everyone else groaned.
I was his secretary for a short while and I understood every word.
