27 Hilarious Salt I Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

I started to eat my mashed potatoes with a lot of butter and salt.

It’s just butter that way

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👤︎ u/TbhJustAnotherGuy

📅︎ Jun 30 2022

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Sometimes I mix salt with water, then with mustard

It is an attempt to summon the musical legend, Saline Dijon

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👤︎ u/kavisiegel

📅︎ Apr 13 2022

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I almost got ran over by a salt spreader truck early this morning.

Watch where you going I shouted after him through gritted teeth.

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👤︎ u/Steves1982

📅︎ Feb 09 2022

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My friend didn't notice I put salt in his water...

He's Sodium

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👤︎ u/sccl97

📅︎ Sep 13 2021

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I love salt jokes...

They’re just sodium funny

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👤︎ u/Cold_Adhesive

📅︎ Apr 12 2021

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I'm on a very low salt diet and geeze I swear McDonald's makes it hard.

There fries are just sodium good!!

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👤︎ u/NeferyCauxus

📅︎ Jul 15 2021

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I just told a blind person to pass the salt on the beach....

He said he didn't sea salt.

Its 12:16 right now give me a break

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👤︎ u/Bluedaite_

📅︎ Jun 28 2021

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My friend added ketchup, mustard, pepper and salt to his hot dog. Upon his first bite he got a piece stuck in his windpipe, while I happily munched my hotdog with no problems...

The real choke is in the condiments.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Jul 22 2021

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True story: As kids, my sister and I were fighting over the TV remote and it got heated. The remote flew across the room and a couple AAA batteries fell out. My sister threw one at me, and I grabbed a nearby salt shaker and threw it at her.

My mother, who was watching this go down, just laughs and says, "Assault and battery!"

She then left the room, cackling.

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👤︎ u/danieltkessler

📅︎ Mar 07 2021

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I was supposed to go to a salt n pepa concert next week

Unfortunately, due to the coronavirus they had to push it

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👤︎ u/GuyM3

📅︎ Jul 27 2020

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I heard a salt joke the other day.

It was sodium.

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👤︎ u/soloazn

📅︎ Feb 25 2021

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I work in a kitchen and my colleague threw a satchet of salt at me and said

You’ve just been a-salted

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👤︎ u/Cordite96

📅︎ Sep 23 2020

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I lived in Salt Lake Utah

That makes me a SLUT resident

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👤︎ u/Slymood

📅︎ Aug 27 2020

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Hey son, today I told your science teacher a joke about salt, and she said...

"That's sodium funny!"

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👤︎ u/Myusernameisfish

📅︎ Jul 24 2020

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I’d like to tell a joke about salt...

Na.

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👤︎ u/rogan2929

📅︎ Apr 12 2019

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I eat a lot of salt, but the WHO suggests consuming 2,000 mg of sodium daily.

I don't know what a band knows about health, but I take it with a grain of salt.

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👤︎ u/berriobvious

📅︎ Sep 09 2019

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I tried cleaning the house, ended up with a bunch of salt water damage.

Thats the last time I use Tide

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👤︎ u/robertdowneysoft

📅︎ Aug 02 2018

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When I was in basic training we couldn't have salt or pepper.

Those were reserved for the seasoned veterans.

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👤︎ u/wmyspr

📅︎ Mar 23 2019

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I there was tea that was made of salt

It would probably be salt-tea

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👤︎ u/SamaNyaTa1004

📅︎ Mar 23 2019

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I accidentally knocked over the salt shaker near my Dad

He said "Help. I've been assaulted".

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👤︎ u/HarrisonSchmitt

📅︎ Aug 24 2014

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My friend and I argued whether or not you can make tea out with salt

They insisted I was being dumb but, I think they were just being salt-tea.

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👤︎ u/Crimsonate-F3

📅︎ Sep 02 2018

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As we were eating dinner last night, I held up the salt shaker and my knife and asked my family, "Do you know what this is?"

Assault with a deadly weapon!

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter

📅︎ Aug 24 2017

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I dropped salt on myself while at the grocery store

My wife says: You've just been assaulted!

Me: Groan....

But at the same time, I'm so proud! :)

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👤︎ u/choralmaster

📅︎ Jul 27 2016

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I tried to take everything with a grain of salt...

But my doctor told me to cut back on the sodium!

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👤︎ u/sforwood

📅︎ Apr 28 2016

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I named my salt and pepper shakers Hans and Frans...

they are here to spice you up!

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👤︎ u/defmid26

📅︎ Sep 20 2016

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I was supposed to go to a salt an pepa concert last week

Unfortunately, due to lockdown, they had to push it

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👤︎ u/GuyM3

📅︎ Sep 04 2020

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I love telling jokes about salt.

They're sodium funny!

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👤︎ u/PhamallamaDingDong

📅︎ May 23 2017

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