Why is Jesus considered the richest saint?

He made the most prophets.

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πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
I was surprised to learn my family had never heard of the patron Saint of e-mails

So I had to tell them about Saint Francis of A CC

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hatchitt
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Who is the patron saint of copying people in emails?

St. Francis of a CC

πŸ‘︎ 75
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarDarBinks124
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Picture Perfect Puns

Ancient Scot Richard's Warriors: Dick's Picts

Loki - Trick pics (from my brother)

Pictures of an Adam Sandler movie: "Click" pics.

Pictures of a Kaitlin Olson character: The Mick's pics

Screenahots of these comments: Wit pics

Leaky faucet: drip pics

X1 Cumberbatch photos: Benedict pics

X2 Pope photos: Benedict pics (also works)

X3 Turncoat snaps: Benedict pics

X4 "Wong" image: Benedict pics

Legal command: Writ pics

Pictures of twigs: Stick pics

A Christmas Story scene: lick pics

Pictures of a Winter Saint: Nick pics

Syringe photos: prick pics (from a friend)

Sporting goods store images: Dick's pics.

Dan Harmon cartoon character: Rick's pics.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AndySkibba
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Saints Locke room

I walk into the saints locker room with a canister They ask β€œwhat is it” I say β€œFor Brees” (Awful I know)

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sendmetitpics69
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
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Can you believe that they are still together after all of the crap they have been through?

Your buttcheeks

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TwitcherDeath07
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
🚨︎ report
I told my son I believe everyone goes to heaven until the resurrection of the saints

He said, "Why just the saints? There's like 31 other football teams."

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Horton780
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call the night before Saint Lawrence’s Day?

Yves Saint Laurent

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Which of the saints could predict the future?

Saint Cristobal

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_thechancellor_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Go to the animal shelter for a dog and you're a saint.

Go to the women's shelter for a new girlfriend and everyone loses their mind.

πŸ‘︎ 98
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
🚨︎ report
An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, ...

an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Taiwanese, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turkish, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean all go to a nightclub...

The doorman stops the

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 106
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chainz4Dayz
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
At the pearly gates, Saint Peter asks new arrivals what they did for a living...

The first person says β€œI was a doctor, I saved lives.” St. Peter lets him in.

The second person says β€œI was a teacher, I educated and inspired hundreds of children”. St Peter lets him in.

The third says β€œI was a musician, I brought joy and beautiful music to many people.”

St. Peter says β€œok, but you’ll have to go around back and come in through the kitchen.”

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/02K30C1
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Saint Patrick’s Day cancelled due to COVID-19

We are very sorry to announce that Saint Patrick’s Day has been cancelled this year due to COVID-19. We are doing our best to keep the leprechauns in quarantine but as you know, they are very tricky and do not like feeling trapped. Everyone please stay safe.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Littlepips
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Why doesn’t Santa wear any underwear?

...because he’s Saint Knicker-less!

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/monkfish-online
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Who is the patron saint of homeless dogs and cats?

St. Ray

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Jolly Ole Saint Nicholas...
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Unkempt_ROUS
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Today I found out who the patron saint of silence is.

It is St.Fu.

πŸ‘︎ 298
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2018
🚨︎ report
(X post) An artillery captain was made a saint by the Catholic Church.

One could say he was cannonized,

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
🚨︎ report
The patron saint of beleaguered IT support workers should be named Turner O'Finnanegan
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mc_tammer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2017
🚨︎ report
I've been named the patron saint of Chipotle...

Call me Guaca-holy.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheCopperDimes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Important information

Aruba - Cherry Pie $3.45

Bahamas - Apple Pie $2.75

Jamaica - Key Lime Pie $3.34

Saint Croix - Lemon Pie $4.21

These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MobileBrowns
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that one of the saints from the New Testament had a pet dinosaur?

People started calling him Jurassic Mark.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mkaic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Santa Clause is a Saint Nickname.
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ViewtifulMoe
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2015
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less!

πŸ‘︎ 91
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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Ssdgm-
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call the patron saint of gross soups?

St.ew

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jdrawer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2016
🚨︎ report
I nominate Tim Vine as our patron saint. youtube.com/watch?v=00dFz…
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ayedfy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2013
🚨︎ report
So 3 nuns die and go to Heaven and are at the pearly gates...

After dying in a fatal car crash, 3 nuns end up at the pearly gates and the saint there tells them "Since you're so pure of heart and free of sin you can all go into the Kingdom of Heaven if you answer 3 questions. I'm going to ask you one question each."

The saint turns to the first nun and asks: "Who were the first two humans God created?"

She says: "Adam and Eve!"

She gets into Heaven.

The saint turns to the second nun and asks: "What was the one thing Adam and Eve were told not to do in the Garden of Eden?"

She says: "They weren't allowed to eat the fruit of knowledge!"

She gets into Heaven.

The saint turns to the last nun - the mother superior - and says "Since you're the mother superior my last question is going to be difficult to answer, but if you answer correctly you can get into Heaven. So my question for you is: What was the first thing Eve said to Adam when they realized they were naked?"

Now she has to think a little and as she thinks she's close to conceding, uttering "Gee, that's a hard one..."

The saint lets her right into Heaven.

The End.

πŸ‘︎ 283
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thora-suan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2018
🚨︎ report
My son asked me what I think about Mormons

Are you asking if they're devils or saints? Well this day I say the latter!

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/voip_geek
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a fat jolly man with no pocket change?

Saint Nickel-Less

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sgt_PoopyMan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a fake stone in Ireland? A Sham Rock!

Happy Saint Patrick's Day!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Conrad273
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Nuts

What is the difference between Beer nuts and Deer nuts? Beer nuts are about $1.98 and deer nuts are under a buck

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Garyfromtucson
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2018
🚨︎ report
Knock knock. Who’s there? Owen. Owen who?

Owen the saints, go marching in, Owen the saints go marching in ...

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/musichorn
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
🚨︎ report
My dad gets the internet.

So I was talking to my friend on Skype, and my dad walks up,

"Hey, (friend's name), be careful. Teddifus has a cold and I think he coughed on the screen. You might get a computer virus."

Gold.

πŸ‘︎ 191
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TeddifusCorn
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2014
🚨︎ report
Who is the patron saint of email?

Saint Francis of a cc

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TabCompletion
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Who is the patron saint of copying people into emails?

St. Francis of a CC

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/theprogrammerx
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Who is the Patron Saint of copying people into emails?

St. Francis of a CC

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JDGeek
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
🚨︎ report
An artillery captain was made a saint in the Catholic Church.

One could say he was cannonized.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Who is the patron saint of emails?

St. Francis of a CC.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Skiftonoid
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2018
🚨︎ report
Who is the patron saint of email?

St Francis of a CC.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/timotab
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2016
🚨︎ report
An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American, an Andorran

An Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turk, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean all go to a bar..

The doorman stops them and says sorry I can’t let you in without a T

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 139
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Frase32
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report
A bar joke for y'all

An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turk, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean

All go to a bar

The doorm

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Zarni1410
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
🚨︎ report
An Afghan...

...an Albanian, an Algerian, an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Jap, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Taiwanese, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turkish, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean all go to a nightclub.

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 92
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2017
🚨︎ report

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