I used to be the triangle player in a Jamaican band but I had to quit....
It was always just one ting after another.
Edit: Thanks for all the positive reactions to this joke. Iβm glad I could make a few of you chuckle today.
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Nov 12 2020
My brother had to quit his job as a weightlifter because he wasn't strong enough.
He handed in his too weak notice yesterday.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Nov 13 2020
I just quit my job at the helium factory.
I wonβt be spoken to in that tone.
π︎ 226
π
︎ Dec 26 2020
I've decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because I'm not big enough or strong enough.
I've just handed in my too weak notice.
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Oct 22 2020
I quit being a flat earther,
because no one took me sphereiously.
π︎ 32
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︎ Jan 14 2021
I quit my job as a postman when they handed me my first letter to deliver.
I looked at it and thought, βThis isnβt for me.β
π︎ 34
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︎ Jan 16 2021
I still remember my childhood quite fondly, when dad used to roll us down the hill inside car tires.
Those were the Good Years.
π︎ 47
π
︎ Jan 02 2021
My wife said, βI donβt quite understand the science behind human cloning.β
Me: That makes two of us.
π︎ 52
π
︎ Jan 12 2021
I quit my job at the concrete plant.
My job was getting harder & harder.
π︎ 226
π
︎ Nov 26 2020
How to politely tell your Greek friend Robert to be quite.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 29 2021
Told my wife I was quitting my job today to become an electrician
π︎ 65
π
︎ Nov 16 2020
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda-pressing.
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Jul 25 2020
Why did the Donkey quit his job?
π︎ 23
π
︎ Nov 19 2020
I was asked to play the triangle in our local symphony orchestra! But I quit because . . .
It was just one ting after another.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Nov 30 2020
Yup I quit cold turkey last month.
Warmed in the microwave is so much better.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Dec 14 2020
The chances of seeing two together is quite remote.
π︎ 32
π
︎ Nov 21 2020
I quit my job at the IRS.
π︎ 49
π
︎ Nov 26 2020
Why did the bacterial scientist quit his job?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 23 2020
Me: "The cemetery looks quite empty."
My dad: "People must be dying to get in."
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 19 2020
What do you call it when all the hens in the henhouse quit on the same day?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 18 2020
Quite Literally
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Jun 15 2020
You should quit while you're a head
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Jul 05 2020
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda pressing.
π︎ 110
π
︎ Oct 21 2020
Why did the window inspector quit his job?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Dec 07 2020
I quit my elevator job
Had too many ups and downs
π︎ 11
π
︎ Nov 27 2020
I went to college to become a meteorologist but I quit because
too much of the grade was based on class precipitation.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Nov 14 2020
quit loafing around, i have a plane to get to
π︎ 52
π
︎ Sep 30 2020
Why did the skater quit?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 04 2020
I'm quitting my soul sucking corporate job to be a marine biologist.
I've gotta find some porpoise in my life.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Oct 21 2020
I quit drinking for good!
Now I only drink for bad!
π︎ 35
π
︎ Oct 10 2020
My friend quit work by having a multi-layer exploding cake...
When it exploded, everyone in the room left with tiers in their eyes!
π︎ 23
π
︎ Nov 04 2020
I'm quite happy how this play played.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Oct 09 2020
I had to quit my job as a deep sea diver instructor.
The pressure was too much.
π︎ 59
π
︎ Aug 11 2020
I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang,
But eventually it came back to me.
π︎ 29
π
︎ Oct 12 2020
world's in quite a pickle already
π︎ 55
π
︎ Jul 27 2020
I quit my job as a taste tester at the herbal seasonings factory...
... I found the work too Thyme consuming.
π︎ 17
π
︎ Jul 21 2020
I found this quite shocking.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Aug 11 2020
I found the first four Harry Potter books to be quite light hearted.
The fifth one was dead sirius.
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Nov 08 2019
Our toilet quit working.
Me: Our toilet quit working.
Wife: What?! We need that to work.
Me: Yeah. It said it was tired of my shit.
Sorry if this is a repost. I just thought of this (on the toilet of course) and I think my wife may leave me over it.
π︎ 28
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︎ Aug 17 2020
I quit my job at the helium factory today.
I will not be spoken to in that tone of voice!
π︎ 48
π
︎ Jan 12 2021
I decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because Iβm not big enough or strong enough
Iβve just handed in my Too weak notice.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Jun 13 2020
I quit my job at the helium gas factory today
I refuse to be spoken to in that tone.
π︎ 51
π
︎ Sep 29 2020
I remember my childhood quite fondly, when Dad used to roll us down the hill inside car tires.
Those were the Good Years.
π︎ 24
π
︎ Oct 20 2020
Why did the skateboarder quit?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
I quit my job at the helium factory.
I refuse to be spoken to in that tone.
π︎ 67
π
︎ Aug 16 2020
My brother just quit his job as a can crusher
Because it was soda pressing.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Sep 14 2020
I quit my job as a postman when they handed me my first letter to deliver.
I looked at it and thought, βThis isnβt for me.β
π︎ 328
π
︎ May 28 2020
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