I used to be the triangle player in a Jamaican band but I had to quit....
It was always just one ting after another.
Edit: Thanks for all the positive reactions to this joke. Iβm glad I could make a few of you chuckle today.
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Nov 12 2020
My brother had to quit his job as a weightlifter because he wasn't strong enough.
He handed in his too weak notice yesterday.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Nov 13 2020
I just quit my job at the helium factory.
I wonβt be spoken to in that tone.
π︎ 230
π
︎ Dec 26 2020
I've decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because I'm not big enough or strong enough.
I've just handed in my too weak notice.
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Oct 22 2020
I quit being a flat earther,
because no one took me sphereiously.
π︎ 27
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
I quit my job at the concrete plant.
My job was getting harder & harder.
π︎ 227
π
︎ Nov 26 2020
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda-pressing.
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Jul 25 2020
I was asked to play the triangle in our local symphony orchestra! But I quit because . . .
It was just one ting after another.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Nov 30 2020
Why did the Donkey quit his job?
π︎ 24
π
︎ Nov 19 2020
Yup I quit cold turkey last month.
Warmed in the microwave is so much better.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Dec 14 2020
I quit my job at the IRS.
π︎ 48
π
︎ Nov 26 2020
Why did the bacterial scientist quit his job?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Dec 23 2020
What do you call it when all the hens in the henhouse quit on the same day?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 18 2020
Why did the window inspector quit his job?
π︎ 11
π
︎ Dec 07 2020
I quit my elevator job
Had too many ups and downs
π︎ 12
π
︎ Nov 27 2020
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda pressing.
π︎ 110
π
︎ Oct 21 2020
You should quit while you're a head
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Jul 05 2020
I went to college to become a meteorologist but I quit because
too much of the grade was based on class precipitation.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 14 2020
quit loafing around, i have a plane to get to
π︎ 56
π
︎ Sep 30 2020
Why did the skater quit?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 04 2020
My friend quit work by having a multi-layer exploding cake...
When it exploded, everyone in the room left with tiers in their eyes!
π︎ 24
π
︎ Nov 04 2020
I quit drinking for good!
Now I only drink for bad!
π︎ 30
π
︎ Oct 10 2020
I had to quit my job as a deep sea diver instructor.
The pressure was too much.
π︎ 62
π
︎ Aug 11 2020
I quit my job as a postman when they handed me my first letter to deliver.
I looked at it and thought, βThis isnβt for me.β
π︎ 327
π
︎ May 28 2020
I quit my job as a taste tester at the herbal seasonings factory...
... I found the work too Thyme consuming.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Jul 21 2020
Our toilet quit working.
Me: Our toilet quit working.
Wife: What?! We need that to work.
Me: Yeah. It said it was tired of my shit.
Sorry if this is a repost. I just thought of this (on the toilet of course) and I think my wife may leave me over it.
π︎ 26
π
︎ Aug 17 2020
I used to work at a cutlery store, but I quit
π︎ 58
π
︎ Jun 28 2020
How did the pirate quit smoking?
π︎ 38
π
︎ Jul 19 2020
I quit my job as the Pro at the local Miniature Golf course...
... I found the work oft-putting.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jul 22 2020
You'd never believe that Hank Hill quit his job at Strickland to become a drug dealer
He now sells cocaine and cocaine accessories
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jul 28 2020
Why did the programmer quit his job?
because he didn't get arrays.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Jul 20 2020
I walked into my sonβs room and saw him rage quit a video game.
βAre ya whining, son?β
π︎ 4
π
︎ Sep 04 2020
My best friend quit sailing recently
Not long after, he took up drowning
π︎ 15
π
︎ Aug 05 2020
I quit my job today as a sign writer.
I could see the writing was on the wall.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 27 2020
The guy who colors the cloth quit my uncle's factory without warning.
π︎ 19
π
︎ Jun 25 2020
All day long my cat lazes around the house, saying he is hurt. I told him to quit being a hypochondriac
but he just keeps saying "me ow"
π︎ 44
π
︎ Jun 10 2020
Why did the stool quit his election campaign?
He didnβt have any backing !
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 14 2020
Why did the cow farmer quit?
He was tired of smelling dairy air
π︎ 12
π
︎ Jun 16 2020
What is the most effective way to quit being vegan?
π︎ 242
π
︎ Feb 12 2020
This morning, after a long night of binging, I got out of bed and looked in the mirror. I saw my haggard, worn-out body and overcome with emotion I realised that for the sake of my family I had to quit cold turkey.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 07 2020
I quit my job at the helium factory today.
I will not be spoken to in that tone of voice!
π︎ 42
π
︎ Jan 12 2021
I decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because Iβm not big enough or strong enough
Iβve just handed in my Too weak notice.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Jun 13 2020
I quit my job at the helium gas factory today
I refuse to be spoken to in that tone.
π︎ 49
π
︎ Sep 29 2020
Why did the skateboarder quit?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
I quit my job at the helium factory.
I refuse to be spoken to in that tone.
π︎ 65
π
︎ Aug 16 2020
My brother just quit his job as a can crusher
Because it was soda pressing.
π︎ 26
π
︎ Sep 14 2020
I've decided to quit my job as a personal trainer and I don't think I'm quite fit enough for the job.
Therefore I've handed in my 'Too Weak Notice'
π︎ 44
π
︎ Jul 09 2020
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda pressing
π︎ 7
π
︎ Aug 03 2020
Why did the window inspector quit his job?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jul 14 2020
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