Power Tools Puns

Which is why I mixed my drink with a spoon instead.

a BANDsaw

I said, “Don’t be alarmed, this is just a drill!”

A good start!

All hail makita cordless power tools!

One minute I was fine, then BOSCH!

He said I needed some supervision when working with dangerous tools.

Benadryl

I was in a guy's workshop last week waiting for him to come back from the house, and I noticed a jigsaw sitting on the table. Because he was gone awhile (and I was bored), I picked it up and turned it on. Right as I did that he came around the corner and I quickly turned it off and put it down.

Me: "Nobody saw anything."

Him: "Oh I definitely saw that."

Me: "Yeah, but I didn't saw anything."

I said, “what have I told you about leaving the power tools out where the dogs can reach them?”

He looked really confused and said “What? I didn’t leave anything out”

“because the dog is over here sawing some logs!”

Where it’s just gonna be a bunch of dads clicking tongues and pulling power tool triggers

With winter pretty much here my little garage ship has been getting pretty cold. I have poor circulation so my fingers become icicles and I drop tools, which can be very dangerous. So I duct taped some gloves to some German electric power tools. This way I keep my fingers warm while still retaining my Fein motor control.

So a few of us guys and some gals are working at a site for a university show. A couple of the girls wanted to learn how to use power tools, so we taught them. After a few minutes, one of the girls says:

girl: wow this really is a lot of work just for a hole...

to which I reply: THAT'S WHAT IV'E BEEN SAYING!!

everyone laughed, but I sincerely felt bad for that one... thought you guys might get a kick outta it too!

I just got a job at a power tool and machinery supply store, on my first day (Thursday) I was hanging out around the cash sorting exacto-knives and one of my coworkers is assisting a customer with the purchase of a drill. They're comparing two drills online, one is $149.99 and the other is $159.99.

Customer: So what is the difference between the two drills?

Me: About ten dollars.

heh. hehehehehe.

I work selling home improvements supplies/ tools in a department store. My co-worker and I were putting new products on the shelves, and I happened to grab some power sanders, so I remarked to my co -worker that

I found Bernie Sanders' brother, DeWalt Sanders.

(DeWalt is a brand of hand and power tools.)