What's a pirates favorite toy to play with?
π︎ 19
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︎ May 12 2021
Why should you never play Hacky Sack with Bigfoot
You'll get you sack-squashed.
π︎ 15
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︎ Apr 17 2021
Why shouldn't you play Uno with Mexicans?
They get all the green cards.
π︎ 5
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︎ May 07 2021
my crush came over to play with legos
it was a good way to build a relationship
π︎ 13
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︎ Apr 06 2021
What toy can a blind person never play with at the park?
π︎ 21
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︎ Apr 02 2021
I play Chess regularly with my friend, but last time he suddenly said " let's make this interesting "...
..so we stopped and went home.
π︎ 5k
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︎ Aug 04 2020
Why did the drummer play with vegetables?
He needed some fresh beets . . .
π︎ 19
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︎ Feb 04 2021
My friends won't let me play football with them after I suffered a charley-horse
They said I cramp their style
π︎ 7
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︎ Feb 07 2021
Why shouldnβt you play poker with a plumber?
A good flush will beat a full house every time.
π︎ 12
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︎ Jan 12 2021
My wife plays soccer with her hands.
π︎ 40
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︎ Oct 18 2020
This year, my friend decided to play his string instrument with a neck and a deep round back enclosing a hollow cavity, with a sound hole in the body at the voting booths...
He was arrested for ear poll-lute-tion.
π︎ 4
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︎ Jan 24 2021
Where do shortened versions of movies go to play with each other?
π︎ 2
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︎ Jan 18 2021
You know the problem with watching someone play a racing game?
π︎ 3
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︎ Dec 27 2020
Conversation with my 2y old son: What will happen if the moon falls down? Me: Hmm. Maybe we can play football with it?
Son: Nah. The moon has no legs.
π︎ 56
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︎ Nov 15 2020
I have a friend in Prague who I play chess with.
π︎ 13
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︎ Nov 15 2020
A character you canβt play in a game was sliced with a sword multiple times.
π︎ 14
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︎ Sep 04 2020
I like to play this game with my daughter it's called "hide and seek."
She hides, and then I see how high I can count (out loud) before she gets annoyed and comes out to complain about the game.
π︎ 26
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︎ Jul 21 2020
When I'm reading, I hate the silence, but music with words is too distracting., so I always play music without it.
It's instrumental to my comprehension.
π︎ 8
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︎ Oct 12 2020
A 21 year old that loves to play with play-doh
is a clear case of playdohphilia
π︎ 11
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︎ Sep 16 2020
I'm sorry, I just had to play with my food
π︎ 44
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︎ May 20 2020
I was racking up to play pool with my son, and he said, βDo you wanna break?β
I said, βWe havenβt even started. How lazy are you?β
π︎ 73
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︎ May 14 2020
Germans are so childish, they always play with their food.
π︎ 10
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︎ Aug 11 2020
Just finished playing billiards with my buddy in the Middle East when I decided to play a prank on him.
βIraqβ, I said. Then Iran.
π︎ 4
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︎ Aug 06 2020
I like to play Yahtzee with criminals
π︎ 9
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︎ Jul 10 2020
My friends and I like to get together and play polo with our Rams, Challengers, Chargers and Darts...
Dodge ball can become dangerous, but it's fun.
π︎ 2
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︎ Jul 30 2020
What is Captain Morganβs fav board game to play with his family?
π︎ 2
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︎ Jul 13 2020
Why wouldnβt that kid play catch with Santa Claus?
π︎ 45
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︎ Feb 08 2020
So proud of my daughter! Weβre watching the dog desperately trying to get the cat to play with her. Me: βDog canβt hang because sheβs a dump truck and and the cat is a Ferrari. Daughter:
Donβt you mean a βFur-rariβ?
π︎ 17
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︎ May 09 2020
My friend said he couldn't play with us because he had to write a "600 words reflection" so I did one for him
π︎ 10
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︎ May 08 2020
My dog keeps biting my watch when I play with him
Good thing he doesnβt eat it, that would be time consuming
π︎ 6
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︎ May 02 2020
Girlfriend told me to play with boomerangs, i told her to throw that idea out of the window
π︎ 9
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︎ Apr 21 2020
Why didn't the lamb want to play with their friends?
He was a little sheep-ish.
π︎ 11
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︎ Mar 06 2020
I can't get my son to play any fighting games with me.
I think he's afraid of tekken me on.
π︎ 12
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︎ Apr 10 2020
I tried to play guitar with my friend, but he wouldnβt stop showing off how much better he is.
He really struck a chord with me.
π︎ 33
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︎ Feb 02 2020
My daughter found a candy wrapper to play with.
π︎ 4
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︎ Apr 13 2020
For Dads that play Fortnite with their kids: What does Peely say when heβs sick?
Iβm not βpeelingβ so well. :-)
π︎ 5
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︎ Mar 08 2020
What game can you play with a wombat?
π︎ 6
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︎ Jan 20 2020
Two days ago, I wanted to play hide and seek with kids but couldn't
Good players are hard to find.
π︎ 48
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︎ Dec 16 2019
My German neighbor: Here are some old toy trucks your kids can play with.
π︎ 6
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︎ Feb 26 2020
I went to the park today to play frisbee with my dog.
It was shit, I need a flatter dog.
π︎ 60
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︎ Sep 23 2019
What do you get when you play tug of war with a pig?
π︎ 33
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︎ Sep 09 2019
Never play chess with an Australian
You'll never know if "you're in check, mate" or if "you're in checkmate"
π︎ 20
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︎ Sep 08 2019
I have a European friend that I play chess with.
π︎ 11
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︎ May 23 2020
I have a European friend who I play chess with
... Or as I like to call him, my Czech mate
π︎ 9
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︎ May 21 2020
What sport do you play with a wombat?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Jan 31 2020
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