Peruke Puns

I understand that they became popular when some kings wanted to hide their baldness, but is there a reason for the long, curly white look? I've never really seen natural hair that looked like that. What were they trying to emulate?

Om vi säger att man ska ta ett nytt pass, så kommer man till polisen och har en ful peruk på sig, skulle polisen våga be en ta av peruken? Eller skulle man få ta bilden i peruken?

The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.

Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.

The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:

"What's sarong with that?"

I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).

His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.

--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)

--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.

I would have a daughter

But Bill kept the Windows

Just dropping this here as it was a great help to me in the past. It's maybe about 3 years old at this stage though so feel free to remove anywhere that's closed down, or better yet, feel free to add in anything that's popped up in recent times. Few months time we'll be able to enjoy them all to their fullest ❤

Dinner (formal)

Mulberry Garden

Forrest Avenue

Locks

The Pig's Ear

Pearl Brasserie

The Saddle Rooms

The Merrion

Dax

The Cliff House

Mr Fox

The Grayson

Chapter One

Patrick Guilbaud's

L'Ecrivan

Wilde

Heron and Grey

Shanahans

Dinner (upper casual)

Woollen Mills

Coppinger Row

Bastible

Pichet

The Green Hen

The Winding Stair

Bloom Brasserie

Ananda

Ely

Rassam

Osteria Lucio's

The Ivy

Marco Pierre Whites

Trocadero

Shelbourne Social

Farm

Fire

Brasserie 8A

Bresson

Sophie's

Roberta's

Hartley's

Deville's

Toscana's

Ouzos

1909

Rustic Stone

Dinner (casual)

Fallon & Byrne (Basement)

Bunsen

Featherblade

Skinflint

Fish Shop

Jo Burger

Port House Pinto X

Acapulco

Musashi

Galliot and Gray

Cirillo’s

The Market Bar

That's Amore

Wagamamas

Milano's

FXB

Elephant and Castle

Zizzi’s

BYOB

The Vintage Kitchen

The Little Kitchen

Keshk

Zakura

Dada

Basil

Seagrass

Zakura

Mario’s

Damascus Gate

Jerusalem Cafe

Kerela Kitchen

Date

Peruke & Periwig

Red Bank Wine Bar

VCC

Blind Pig

Bow Lane

Chelsea Drugstore

The Stags Head (Tue ukelele night)

House

Brunch

Tang by Yogism (Dawson St)

Bibi's

Grove Rd

Two Fifty Square

Eathos (Sat)

Taco Taco

San Lorenzo's

Yogism

777

The Fumbally (Sat)

Angelina's

Sophie's

Herb Street

Farmer Browns

Quiet Drink

The Green Hen

The Cellar

L’gueuleton

Busy Casual Bar

PMacs

Blackbird

Dice

Crowbar

Garage Bar

MVP

Mary's

Mc Sorleys

Slattery’s

Hogan’s

Beer Garden

The Bernard Shaw

Pyg

The Living Room

Odessa rooftop

Madigan Square Garden (Horse Show House)

Watch a Match

The Butcher Bar

Gleeson’s

Kiely’s

Horse Show House

Coffee

Roasted Brown, 3FE, Cloud Picker & Two Fifty Square stockers, Illy

Clement & Pekoe

Grove Rd

Kaph

Vice

Brother Hubbard/Sister Sadie

Industry

Indigo & Cloth

Coffee Angel

The Fumbally

Le Cêntre Ville

The Happy Pear

Lunch

The Fumbally

Blazing Salads

Industry & Co

Staple Foods

True story; it even happened last night. My 5-year-old son walks up behind me and out of the blue says, "hey."

I turn to him and say, "yeah, kiddo? What's up?"

He responds, "it's dead grass."

I'm really confused and trying to figure out what's wrong and what he wants from me. "What? There's dead grass? What's wrong with that?"

.

.

.

He says, totally straight-faced, "hay is dead grass," and runs off.

And then you will all be sorry.

No it doesn't.

Now it’s syncing.

He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"

I will find you. You have my Word.

She said how do you know he was headed to work?

“thank you for your cervix.”

Made me smile

Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...

But now I stand corrected.

Wait. Sorry, wrong sub.

Theoretical Fizz-ics

Because you can’t ‘C’ in the dark

Wookie mistake.

I said, “That makes two of us.”

so I had to ground him.

He's doing better currently.

And conducting himself properly.