For the last few months, I’ve been noticing that my teenage son periodically breaks into hives.

I have no idea why he hates bees so much.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I shower periodically.
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dankmonseiur69
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2018
🚨︎ report
I periodically come across jokes such as these...
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BearAssault101
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
If you tell people "na" periodically it will just end up making them salty.
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/arcadesdude
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2018
🚨︎ report
I post science puns but only periodically.
πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stone_Miner_1225
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Have you heard of the woman who periodically bursts into a pet shop asking if they have big white bears?

She's been diagnosed with buypolar disorder.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thefizzynator
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2016
🚨︎ report
My dad sends me these reminders periodically...

http://imgur.com/a/sS59b

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Speargat1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2016
🚨︎ report
I need your jokes

My gf is on her period. I have been telling her all day period puns and jokes. I am all out and i need your help

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FellowCat69
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What did God do after creating a 24-hour period of alternating light and darkness of Earth?

He called it a day.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
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Why is the time period from 476 - 800 ad known as Dark Ages?

Because it was the time of knights.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/D3V1L420
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Lazy Christmas morning, my wife is looking at the weather, says there will be periods of rain today.

I say, Damn! Do they make a pad for that? Without a pause, she says: Depends

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/flylink63
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I saw a linguist about my problem with putting periods where. they don’t belong in sentences

I suffer from premature punctuatio!n

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vehiclesales
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
The seating columns at my church are going through a period of awkward changes...

***Pew***berty, in other words.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
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Without periods

The United States is just like the rest of us

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call the time period between the Bronze and Iron Ages where humans learned to cure meat?

The Sausages.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kiltebeest
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
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How often do I like jokes about chemistry?

Periodically.

πŸ‘︎ 149
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrizztoElCazador
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
🚨︎ report
What's your favourite element on the periodic table?

Mine's the element of surprise

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Strong91105
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
How often does a chemist tell a joke about elements?

Periodically

πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
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β€œBro who’s periodic table is this?”

Bromine

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HungTDD
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What's a pirate's favourite element in the periodic table?

Gold. Why would he like argon or carbon

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Schrodingers_liar
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
🚨︎ report
My sister said I looked like a German composer and musician of the Baroque period, especially when wearing my powdered wig... So I changed everything and it changed my life!

I haven't looked Bach since!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Scientists have discovered a new element in the periodic table.

The element will be represented by the letters AH. This is of course the element of surprise.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Unikorn9
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
How did the grammar nazi die?

They got semicolon cancer.

πŸ‘︎ 61
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πŸ‘€︎ u/arcajazz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
🚨︎ report
I asked my wife β€œWhat’s it like having to deal with periods?”

She said β€œI just go with the flow”.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I put an Atlanta hat on my periodic table.

I’m not afraid to brave the elements.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when someone is put on hold for a long period of time?

They gain wait.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I was gonna tell a joke about copper

But i Cu are not interested

πŸ‘︎ 92
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πŸ‘€︎ u/420Rain
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife made a graph to track her periods.

It's a flow chart.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hybridtheory1331
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
A good pun requires periodic timing
πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/atastycooky
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Chemistry Pun
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What virus ended the Jurassic Period?

Dino-SARS

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bisexual girl on her period?

A Bicycle.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/90sWannabe
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Period
πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/D1SGUST1PAT3D
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the period of euphoria after using methamphetamine called?

Aftermeth

Yeah, it's a "bad" joke.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Schwwish
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I don’t hate ALL of the periodic table.

Just elements of it

πŸ‘︎ 104
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Titsonafish
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I hate being bi polar...

It's awesome.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call iron in the wind?

Febreeze.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/menscheese
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?

He was missing the point

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/-Llama58-
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I also enjoy eating lunch on a periodic table
πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Periods aren't bad

Its just women's ovary acting

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Shaurya_Jain
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
🚨︎ report
What do I say to my gf when she's on her periods and is flipping out on every damn thing I say?

Your ovary-acting.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shaanman
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried to name a period of 24 hours.

I had to call it a day.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BuurmanSnoek
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I wanted to post something here for National Periodic Table Day...

But I'm out of my element.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked a zoologist about the gestation period of pachyderms... .

He said he didn't want to talk about the elephant in the womb

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Have you heard they’re making Christmas themed tampons?

They’re for the festive period!

πŸ‘︎ 109
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Strange_An0maly
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
🚨︎ report
From sunrise to sunset, I couldn't remember the name for a 24 hour time period. I finally did.

Then I called it a day.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CIMMGW
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
🚨︎ report
A periodic table
πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/periwinke
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2018
🚨︎ report
Archeologists recently discovered Cleopatra’s tampons.

They turned out to be real period pieces.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BunBunChow
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report

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