What did the optimistic scientist say when he woke up?
What blood is the most optimistic?
What’s an optimistic vampire’s favorite drink?
I’m very optimistic about the upcoming U.S. elections. I feel as though the country will be able to move forward with a strong, clear vision.
When your latin teacher is optimistic
I’m an optimistic pessimist.
I’m positive things will go wrong.
Why was Humpty Dumpty optimistic for winter?
Why is 0 a optimistic number?
Because 0 is never a negative number.
What did the optimistic potato say to the pessimistic potato?
What does a viking that is trying to be optimistic say?
Could be norse.
(I just thought of this, i genuinely hope it's not a repost.)
I complimented all of my kids today for being so optimistic....
...because every darn glass they leave sitting around the house is at least half full...
Why is the KanJPz an optimistic tank destroyer?
Because if it was pessimistic, it would be called the KantJPz
If pelicans weren't so optimistic...
we would have to start calling them pelican'ts
My Optimistic Dad.
"I can't wait til tomorrow"
Why?
"I get better looking every day!"
I ate an optimist once...
But, I couldn't keep him down.
The pessimist sees a dark tunnel. The optimist sees a light at the end of the tunnel. The realist sees a freight train.
The train driver sees three idiots standing on the tracks.
Dear Optimist, Pessimist and Realist. While you were arguing about the glass of water, I drank it.
Crane flies are optimists.
They're always looking on the bright side.
An Optimist and a Pessimist Walk into a Bar
The optimist orders a drink while the pessimist puts ice on the bruise.
When a Minotaur considers himself an optimist is it that he sees his glass as half-bull?
Pessimist....Things can't get any worse.
Optimist.....Nah!! Of course they can.
i wanna see pessimistic one
What type of blood does an optimist have?
I met a transformer who only had positive thoughts.
He said his name was optimist prime
I’ve been having problems with my vision, so yesterday I went to my optimist.
He said it would get better.
A pessimist has a glass that’s half empty, an optimist has a glass that’s half full.
An optometrist just has a pair of glasses!
The optimist sees the donut whole; the pessimist sees the donut hole.
I tried to get this to a sexual joke, but I will leave it as an exercise for the reader.
How do you know pelicans are optimists?
If they were pessimists we’d call them pelicants.
I went to a party full of optimists and passed out after drinking too much.
I woke up and someone had drawn happiness on my forehead.
An Optimist was Walking Around a Graveyard
He said, “I’m seeing a lot of plus signs here.”
Which Transformer always sees the glass as half full?
An optimist jumps from the Empire State building midway someone asks..
How are you doing?
Optimist: so far so good
"Nobody is ever going to find a prime number larger than me!" - Optimist Prime
What is an optimist's favorite condiment?
At a job interview:
"What are your strengths?"
"I'm an optimist and a positive thinker."
"Can you give me an example?"
"Yes, when do I start?"
Ah physics class... You've done it again
A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State building.
"Don't do it!!" he yelled. "You have so much potential!"
Why was Humpty Dumpty optimistic for winter?
Because he had a great fall.
Why was Humpty Dumpty optimistic for winter?
Because he had a great fall.
Why is Humpty Dumpty so optimistic about the coming Winter?
Because he had a great Fall!
An optimist and a pessimist...
An optimist sees light at the end of a tunnel and thinks it’s an exit.
A pessimist sees light at the end of a tunnel and assumes it is an onrushing train.
The train conductor sees two stupid guys staggering on train tracks.
Optimist Prime and Negativetron.
What blood type do optimists have?
What do you call a Transformer with a half full fuel tank?
A man wanted to jump off a building
A scientist who was there yelled at him: Don't, you have so much potential!
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