What should be the 2017 Oscars La la Land - Moonlight controversy renamed as?

DilEmma

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πŸ‘€︎ u/engineerwho_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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Danson in the Moonlight youtube.com/watch?v=M0els…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trchappybob
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
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The difference between being under the moonlight and out in the sun...

...is just night and day

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlexMV14
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
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I have a friend who's a surgeon that moonlights as a comedian

He likes to leave everyone in stitches.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/norrisrw
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
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What do you call a British accountant who moonlights as a sex worker?

Tally ho!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KnickersInAKnit
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2018
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I met a milkman that moonlights as a Mexican wrestler...

They called him a Lechedor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SineMetu777
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2017
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I think my chiropractor moonlights as a comedian.

She really cracks me up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/warchiello
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2018
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Danson in the Moonlight vine.co/v/ebOQPWiXvvv
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trchappybob
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2015
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Why do exorcists moonlight as lawyers?

Because possession is nine tenths of the law.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2015
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There was a lumberjack who moonlighted as a serial killer. He used wood chippers to dispose of the bodies, which is why he was so prolific.

Every once in a while, these guys come out of the woodwork.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
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In addition to fixing customers shoes, the local cobbler moonlighted as a shoe salesman...

He often found old used shoes in thrift stores and re-soled them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
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I started moonlighting at a late night bakery

I knead a lot of dough

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kshiau
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2018
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What does Lil’ Jon and Beethoven have in common?

Both are famous for saying β€œWhat?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2019
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What do you call an alligator in a vest?

An Investigator

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2017
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Village Idiot Puns

Way back when I was a kid, for my school's Renaissance Faire-esque fundraiser, I went around wearing a sign that read "Vilage Idiot". When guests asked why, I'd reply, "I wasn't always the village idiot...

  • β€œI used to be a tailor... but it didn't quite suit me... It was only a so-so job.”
  • β€œI once was a lumberjack... but I couldn't hack it... so they gave me the axe.”
  • β€œI was a fisherman too... I just couldn't live off my net income.”
  • β€œI thought about being a witch for a spell.”
  • β€œI tried being a chef... but I just didn't have enough thyme for it.”
  • β€œI was a musician once... but I didn't accomplish anything noteworthy.”
  • β€œFor awhile I was a doctor... but I didn't have the patience to keep it up.”
  • β€œI once was a accountant... but I lost interest. The job was too taxing.”
  • β€œI tried moonlighting as a nun... but I confess, they didn't like my altar ego... or my bad habits.”
  • β€œMore recently, I was a baker... but I couldn't make enough dough at it... Guess I wasn't bred for the job.”
  • β€œHeck, I was even king for a day... but I didn't have any crowning achievements.”

...And so now, here I am: village idiot, just like my father was. Ah... my father, he was the best village idiot we ever had. It's hard living in his shadow sometimes. You see, my father was a complete idiot! ...I'm just a half-wit.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ason42
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2016
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What do you call a single breast out at night?

🎡mammary, all alone in the moonlight...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gwtkof
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2017
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(X-Post from /r/Jokes) Two dad jokes for the price of one!

What do you call a fitness instructor who moonlights as an action hero?

Jason Stay-thin

What do you call a music artist who works out and is a bit of a creep?

Slim Shady

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RagingDraugr
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2017
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