A blonde goes into a church and asks the minister, "How much does it cost to rent a church singing group?"He said,"Do you mean a choir?"

She said "Fine... How much does it cost to acquire a church singing group?"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 13k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/shdchko
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 05 2020
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I donโ€™t mean to brag, but I just put a puzzle together in 1 day...

and the box said 2-4 years!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/BusyPooping
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 24 2020
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Pre- means before. Post- means after. To use both prefixes together,

...would be preposterous

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 17k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/amar610
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 19 2020
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My maths teacher called me average yesterday. How MEAN...
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/shivraj234
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 13 2020
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Well I mean I would be mad...
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 11k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/xxDr-Beckyxx
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 10 2020
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I mean technically
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 49
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/its_boogeyman
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 28 2020
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Does anyone know what LGBTQ means?

No one is giving me a straight answer

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 38
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/NathyDre
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 10 2020
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Every time I ask my son what a new phrase means, he tells me to google it.

Kids these days have a lot of slang for a killer clown movie.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/J3fbr0nd0
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 05 2020
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I don't know what the word "stubborn" means

But I won't stop until I figure it out.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Scarvius
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 24 2020
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Know what it means when the mods remove some of your posts?

That they've taken a fence!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/GoodChadAndUgly
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 12 2020
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Iโ€™ve been asking people what LGBTQ means

Nobody will give me a straight answer.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 300
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/kingdragon2430
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 13 2020
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I didn't mean to take too much of my anxiety medication

It was Xanax-ident

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 19
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Subscribe_to_Sam24
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 01 2020
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Itโ€™s not that my high school math teacher was mean...

He was just average.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/mndaver24
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 04 2020
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There are two possibilities for words that mean "final part" or "smaller amount".

The possibilities are: end, less.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ryanooooo
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 08 2020
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My son told me that when it rains it means God is crying.

I agreed with him and told him it was probably because of something he did.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/skullchin
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 31 2020
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Do you know what it means if you have a headache?

It means you have a head.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Anime_fan_21
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 05 2020
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How did the mean turtle cross the road?

Slowly but surly

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/DarthLukas71
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 27 2020
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What did the otter tell the mean beaver?

Dam, you otter beavery kind.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/hkzhr
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 02 2020
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I saw the post about not wanting 2020 to end as it would mean that 2021...

but I am just worried that two years later, nothing will change and it will be still be the same as 2022...

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/AesSedai99
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 23 2020
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Today I saw my wife walk by with her sexiest underwear on, which could mean just one thing.

Itโ€™s laundry day.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 117
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 17 2020
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I mean... yes
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 186
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/more_smiles
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 10 2020
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This pandemic means I'm having to walk everywhere...

Getting tired of this car owner virus

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/listenup78
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 22 2020
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Learnt an interesting fact today..... If you spell "Absolutely Nothing" backwards, you get "Gnihton Yletulosba" which actually means.....

......Absolutely Nothing!!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 18
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ball5deeper
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 11 2020
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I donโ€™t mean to toot my own horn

But sometimes I have trouble getting into the driverโ€™s seat.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 748
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ftpcolonslashslash
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 02 2020
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My 9 month pregnant wife is ready to have our child any day now, but they just wonโ€™t come. Sheโ€™s tried everything she can at this point. Sex, walking, dancing, spicy foods, etc... So when I asked her what I could do to help she said โ€œany means necessary.โ€

To which I replied โ€œNo it doesnโ€™t.โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 31
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/FreshStartGo
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 06 2020
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I know a lady who means well, but is very annoying telling people how to mark their trails...

Sheโ€™s a caring cairn Karen.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/PlatinumCalf
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 10 2020
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Why does โ€œladdiesโ€ mean men but โ€œladiesโ€ means women?

Because โ€œladiesโ€ is missing a D.

Iโ€™ll show myself out now.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 73
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Reckoner65
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 10 2020
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What does love mean?

Zero in tennis, and everything in life.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/yellgames01
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 11 2020
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Itโ€™s 1066 and you know what that means?

I shouldnโ€™t have bought my watch second hand.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Nymphomanius
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 18 2020
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The average person is really mean
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 20k
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/o0oo00oo0o
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 13 2019
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People are always telling me that โ€œmeanโ€ and โ€œrudeโ€ have the same definitions. So I ask them,

โ€œWhat do you rude?โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/MisterBicorniclopse
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 09 2020
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When a feline turns 13 they're 65 in cat years, so that means they are eligible for MediCare.

Or is it MediCat?

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/MelkorHimself
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 24 2020
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mozart is from the classical era and bach is from the baroque era, which means mozart was respecting his fellow ancestor.
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 15
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/oniongoddess
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 10 2020
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My neighbor asked โ€œwhat was with your yard?โ€ I said โ€œyou mean our yardโ€
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 34
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/snolles1773
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 17 2020
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Since this is a โ€œNanaโ€ tree (common name for Juniperus Procumens Green Mountain Juniper bonsai), it was suggested I have a โ€œbaโ€. Therefore, since the stock ticker for Boeing is BA, I bought a toy 787. That means there is now a โ€œbananaโ€ on the counter.
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 14
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/LaceyGayGuy
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 30 2020
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Groups of more than six will be banned under new Corona rules. So we all know what this means...

Sneezy is getting kicked out the seven dwarfs.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/wolfyfancylads
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 11 2020
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I can't figure out what IDK means....

no one else seems to know either.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/j0hnk50
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 09 2020
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When I was in the Army, the drill Sergeant once shouted at me, WHAT DOES SURRENDER MEAN ?!!

..dunno, I give up.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/HugoZHackenbush2
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 27 2020
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I make a mean Tex Mex...

Statistically it's average.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/KaPauw
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 02 2020
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I mean hes a bread turtle
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 68
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/bloodywolfeyes
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 31 2020
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Is it a good restaurant? How can you ask me that? I mean...
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 55
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ElvisGrizzly
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 10 2020
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I got a parking ticket for being parked illegally the other day and Iโ€™ve no idea why. I mean...

The sign clearly said, โ€œFine for parkingโ€.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 45
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/madazzahatter
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 20 2020
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So what if I donโ€™t know what apocalypse means?

Itโ€™s not the end of the world!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 20
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/kickypie
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 06 2020
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