A list of puns related to "Marathons"
He's better off in the long run.
because they're always too SLUG-ish
It's called Running With The Breville
No matter how fast it runs, it's always 60 second...
I think that will help me a lot in the long run.
I hear short legs run in their family.
So the wife is looking at the TV guide, and she says "All that's on this week is marathons. There's a Law & Order marathon, a Blue Bloods marathon, a Bones marathon...".
So I say "They should have an Amazing Race marathon".
Granddaughter laughed for half a minute. Wife just groaned.
Now my Psalms are all sweaty.
It will be good for you in the long run
The cop said, “Sir, that’s not how you play the race card.”
Dude was trippin.
It was her crowning achievement
My friends told me it was quite the feet!
By Russian your way to the finish line
Although it will help you in the long run.
At the Finnish line.
The rundead.
I’m trailing in second place, but there’s still time to ketchup
Save them to your Phone and always have witty jokes at the palm of your hand.
3.14 percent of sailors are pi-rates.
5/4 of people admit they’re bad at fractions.
A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot.
A brain walks into a bar and takes a seat. “I’d like some wings and a pint of beer, please,” it says. “Sorry, but I can’t serve you,” the bartender replies. “You’re out of your head.”
A cheeseburger walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Sorry, we don't serve food here.'
A college education now costs $100,000, but it produces three very proud people: the student, his mama, and his pauper.
A couple of cups of yogurt walk into a country club. “We don’t serve your kind here,” the bartender says. “Why not?” one yogurt asks. “We’re cultured.”
A friend of mine didn’t pay his exorcist. He got repossessed.
A friend of mine is known for sweeping girls off their feet. He’s an extremely aggressive janitor.
A guy walks into a bar, and there’s a horse serving drinks. The horse asks, “What are you staring at? Haven’t you ever seen a horse tending bar before?” The guy says, “It’s not that. I just never thought the parrot would sell the place.”
A guy walks into a bar...and he was disqualified from the limbo contest.
A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head. The bartender says, “What’s with the paper towel?” The pirate says, “Arrr! I’ve got a Bounty on me head!”
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police ask him what happened, the shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
Armed robbers—some say they’re a drain on society, but you’ve got to give it to them.
Barbers…you have to take your hat off to them.
Can February March? No, but April May!
Cooking out this weekend? Don’t forget the pickle. It’s kind of a big dill.
Dad, can you put my shoes on? No, I don't think they'll fit me.
Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn't know it was on fire.
Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!
Dad: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Son: No. What happened? Dad: The teacher woke him up.
Daughter: I have a lot of friends named Nathan. There’s Nathan Miller, Nathan Radcliff, Nathan Lewis… Me: When they are together, do you call them the United Nathans?
Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems.
Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head!
Did you hear about the aquatic sea mammals that escape
... keep reading on reddit ➡Because he was deadicated.
This is a running joke
Meim Crampf
The Chinese refuse to acknowledge Ty won.
Now everyone's mad it runs fast.
He had a winning streak
Trained.
... so that runners know when they pass the last one that it's the final stretch 😊
He's better off in the long run.
He's better off in the long run.
"You've run a marathon before?" she asked, with an air of admiration.
"No," I replied, "but I've thought about it."
All I remember is that it’s been a long running joke in my family
.
Sooner or later it will catch up to him.
They just take the money and run.
The Chinese authorities refuse to recognize Ty Won.
The cop said, “Sir, that’s not how you play the race card.”
Hey why the long race?
It will help you in the long run.
They get a Hufflelump
Cop: "Stop playing the race card."
It runs in the family
The Chinese refuse to recognize Ty won.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.